The most dastardly calamity a bookworm faces is death by TBR.
Bookworms don’t want an extra day in the weekend for reading — bookworms want IMMORTALITY because their TBR is the size of the Galapagos Islands. This is the truth. I SEE IT IN YOUR EYES.
As a nice and helpful blogger what I really should do is give you a list of ways to stay alive despite your TBR giving you the death glare and growing without permission. BUT I AM NOT A NICE BLOGGER. I am an evil overlord in progress. I am about to list a gazillion YA 2016 releases you know you need so very badly. Trying to afford them is a woeful downside. You’ll probably have to sell your furniture or your sister or a spleen or two. (I’m aware you only have one. It doesn’t have to be just your spleen is what I’m saying…)
DON’T SAY YOU WEREN’T WARNED OF THIS POST’S EVIL INTENTIONS.
Today’s Top Ten Tuesday prompt is “Top Ten Most Anticipated Releases For The Second Half Of The Year“ because I already tortured you with lists of books earlier this year. So here are MORE. And I’m not going to list the obvious ones. I mean, HECK YES WE’RE ALL WAITING FOR GEMINA AND HEARTLESS. So let’s explode your TBR with the less known delightful gems. Get ready to sell your spleen.
ALSO THERE WILL BE MORE THAN 10 BECAUSE I’M LOKI AND DO WHAT I WANT.
As proved by last week’s TTT…fantasy is my favourite thing of ever. So obviously this section has the most terribly wondrous excitement from me.
- NEVERNIGHT: This is about assassins and it actually sounds like THERE WILL BE ASSASSINING. So that’s good news. (Wait…did I just say that…) [August]
- THE ARCHITECT OF SONG: I am such a wild rabid fan of AG Howard’s splintered series so do I want her new (New Adult, by the way)? HECK YES. It promises ghostly companions (!!!) and a deaf protagonist (!!!) (which sound a lot like my wattpad story honestly, so I’m 100% down for this). [August]
- THREE DARK CROWNS: This is about sisters who are queens who are fighting for one crown. I LOVE THAT. Sibling rivalry! Always relatable! Always…in good…fun? [September]
- SCYTHE: I mostly want this because NEAL SHUSTERMAN GOODNESS, but also because it’s about the grim reaper having apprentices basically. Who can say no to that? [November]
- MAGIC BITTER MAGIC SWEET: It’s about MAGICAL BAKING!!! This speaks to me on a spiritual level already. Finally someone is giving cake the magical recognition it deserves! [June]
- THE QUEEN OF BLOOD: Despite a horrendous cover — this sounds really epic. The blurb promises spirits that hate humans (#relatable) and also royalty and magical wars and just all the good ol’ stuff. [September]
- A SHADOW BRIGHT AND BURNING: This features a girl who can burst into flames set in Victorian London with demons. YAY GOOD TIMES. [September]
- TIMEKEEPER: It’s an alternate Victorian London controlled by two clock towers. Doesn’t that sound exciting? EXCITING. Plus the protagonist is a mechanic and the blurb says it’s for vans of VE Schwab. Sign me up like NINE TIMES, PLEASE. [November]
I’m actually kind of glad the retellings haven’t completely vanished. I WOULD MISS THEM. I do so love a delectable retelling. Especially for underloved fairy tales!
- FROST: It’s pitched as “Cinder meets The Walking Dead” and I want it. [October]
- SPINDLE: A retelling of Sleeping Beauty! We so do not have enough of those! (Or…any?) [October]
- VASSA IN THE NIGHT: Russian! Folklore! Retelling! That is all I need to say, isn’t it?! RUSSIA. Plus witches and creeptastic talking dolls and I really have no idea why you’re still here and not eating the cover. Go on now. [September]
- KINGDOM OF ASH AND BRIARS: The blurb promises supernatural warfare and a girl who is a shapeshifter. She disguises herself as a guy to get into the army and also as a fairy godmother. SIMULTANEOUSLY? WE CANNOT KNOW. Oh. And the blurb says it “pays homage to Mulan”. #need [September]
I’m not the world’s keenest contemporary reader. BUT I DO LIKE IT ON OCCASION and these sound particularly like my sort of thing.
- ENTER TITLE HERE: This is about a WRITER. I AM A WRITER. Do you see why I need this?! [August]
- THE MEMORY BOOK: This is about a girl losing her memory from a rare genetic condition. AKA THIS IS MY BIOGRAPHY. (I’m kidding. I don’t have a rare genetic condition…I just have no memory. Who even are you again?) [July]
- THE SECRET SCIENCE OF MAGIC: This could actually be magical realism BUT I CAN’T TELL. So here I’ll stuff it. It’s about an anxious math prodigy — do you need hear anymore?! [September]
- TELL ME SOMETHING REAL: This is about three sisters and I adore sisterly books. And also the protagonist is a pianist and there’s a mystery sickness???? Whatever. I’m in. [August]
- THIS IS OUR STORY: Girl detective investigating a hunting trip where 5 boys left and 4 came back and 1 is definitely dead? YAY MURDER, JOHN! [November]
- THE FEMALE OF THE SPECIES: This one also promises murder (as all god thrillers do) and also PUPPIES because the protagonist works in a shelter. This can only be good. [September]
- THE ROW: Because I quite like this author and who can say no to a book about death’s row and family secrets? Also the blurb doesn’t even mention a love-interest so FINGERS CROSSED we can always hope. [October]
- THIEVING WEASELS: It’s a con artist book. A CON ARTIST BOOK. Grifters and con artists and a family of criminals. YOU HAVE NO IDEA OF MY LEVELS OF NEED. [August]
SOME IDIOT (aka: me) STARTED LOOKING AT 2017 RELEASES AND OH DEAR, LET ME WAIL. I need them, like, yesterday. 2017 is going to slay with books. I PROMISE YOU THAT. Now suffer with me.
- UNTITLED BY JODIE MEADOWS: All I’m going to say is “DRAGON TRAFFICKING” and now you know you need it 10000%.
- GILDED CAGE: A magical London where you have to be enslaved for 10 years to magicians?! PLUS: sister and brother duo. Need need need neeeeeeed.
- THE PRINCE’S BANE: Sirens and pirates and things and this is written by A BLOGGER (of whom I’ve beta read other of her writing and can 1000% guarantee she is exceptional).
- LONG MAY SHE REIGN: A shy nerdy scientist SUDDENLY BECOMES QUEEN after the entire court is assassinated. My excitement levels for this is probably unhealthy. BUT I DON’T CARE.
- EVEN THE DARKEST STARS: Set in a fictional Himalayan kingdom!! How entirely spectacular does that sound, right?!?!?!??
- DAUGHTER OF THE PIRATE KING: Piiiiiiiirates. PIRATES! PIRATES! I mean, buried treasure and battles of wits are promised, but whatever. Piiiiiiiirates.
- THE BONE WITCH: I loved the author’s previous book and omg the blurb starts with a sister “accidentally” raising her brother from the dead. Fun times.
- THE CRUEL PRINCE: I love love love Holly Black and I’VE READ ALL HER BOOKS SO FAR AND AM IN WANTING. Hence 2017 cannot come fast enough basically. I have needs for dark faerie princes that stab things and all that. #ISwearImNormal