There comes a time in every blogger’s life when they need to talk about themselves.
This time is like…all the time, honestly. Considering a blog generally equals = AN ENTIRE INTERNET SHAPED KINGDOM TO TALK ABOUT YOU AND YOUR OPINIONS. But hush. Technicalities. Today I want to talk specifically about meeeeee, your favourite book dragon, and my life and what I’m currently up to.
I also haven’t done an #AmCurrently post since, erm…February…2016. It’s possible I avoid talking about me BECAUSE I HAVE NO LIFE. But I’ll do my best, like the true warrior I am inside.
As I mentioned in my last monthly recap, I’M MOVING HOUSE.
In fact, as you read this, I am most likely in a car somewhere traipsing across Australia while aggressively listening to audiobooks to block out the fact that I hate travelling. I GET CAR SICK, OKAY? And I hate holidays, road trips, volcanic explosions, etc. etc. I like my warm hobbit hole, my daily routine…my WiFi.
Needless to say, moving house + being a rabid bookworm is a horrible decision really. I have 14 boxes of books. I’m sure I gave away or sold at least 50 too?!??? And then right as I finished sticky-taping up the last book — BOOM — the postman arrived with more books. Bless him. *
And I’m not going to lie: putting books in boxes, dismantling shelves, and trying to choose which books I’ll need to read on the way up is VERY VERY VERY HARD. I am an anxious grape, as I have mentioned, and have a diagnosed disorder (amongst other things) so moving house has been about as distressing as those gorgeous soaps people make that look like cakes, bUT NO THEY ARE SOAP. And you want badly to eat one. But no Cait. No. they. are. soap. And if that’s not distressing to us all, I don’t know what is.
I did have packing assistance from some professional packers.
Not totally sure I’d recommend this service because the smallest packer kept overloading boxes with books and the taller packer kept DECORATING THE BOXES WITH MY BOOKSTAGRAM PROPS. I can’t even. This was right after she made a “fairy garden” and unwrapped my lucky stars because “ARE THESE PRESENTS, CAIT?!” is a question that could only be answered by seeing for yourself, apparently.
I shall also be leaving my smol army (of nieces and a nephew) behind. Which is, obviously, the saddest thing.
And it’s about 2,000kms away. Here is a visual in case you’re from Jupiter and don’t know earth’s geography.
I’m the little dragon holding and evil glowing ball. I might destroy the world at some point. Or I might eat it. Options.
But there are some POSITIVES about moving: I bought a new bookshelf (!!!!!) and I’m going to have a kind of granny-flat / studio-room, which I plan to fill entirely with books and origami and dragon hatchlings. I may also turn into a granny. And I will have more time to write. I’m also bribing myself to stay sane with the promise of buying 3 hardcovers when I arrive. (I’m thinking preorders of Our Dark Duet, Eliza And Her Monsters, and The Gentleman’s Guide To Vice And Virtue??! Sounds good?!)
Is a room tour in order when I get there? LET ME KNOW IN THE COMMENTS. **
Also my parental gave me a small suitcase and mumbled something about “don’t forget to pack some clothes for the road trip” and I misheard and just filled it with books because #priorities.
* I’m actually concerned about the local delivery man and postie…like what are they going to do with all this free time that they’re not spending carting books to my house?????
** Blatant and shameless comment bribery. I can’t even with you, Cait.
Guess what happens on the 27th?! IT’S MY 6TH * BLOGVERSARY!
“But, um, Cait,” you say, tentatively as you poke your head in the oven to check your cupcakes aren’t burning because reading my blog always drives you to either distraction, spontaneous combustion, or forced cake-baking. “Cait, don’t you generally do a big celebration with lots of giveaways and an overabundance of all caps?”
First of all, excuse you. All caps are never in over abundance.
And secondly, YES I’M SORRYYYYYYYY. **
After I’m all moved, I’ll do a proper giveaway and celebratory post! However I do want to do a Q&A post! Except the only questions you probably want to ask me is is my aLL CAP KEY STUCK ON FOR GOODNESS SAKES TURN IT OFF, CAIT. And also maybe you want to inquire if I actually have a face. (Spoiler: I don’t. I’m a stack of books on legs.)
However if you do have questions (ABOUT ANYTHING!!) let me have at ’em! Queries about writing, blogging, bookstagram, or questions about meeeee and if I have hair, or my opinion on bread, or if I know where left socks disappear to.
I’ll answer them helpfully.
There’s a google form to submit questions below but if it doesn’t show up, link is here!
Until then I’m just going to eat cake.
I’d share but yet…
* Wow. I suddenly feel really old in blogging years. I can literally feel my bones turning grey and my hair developing rheumatism.
** Okay. I see what you mean.
- How my books are just multiplying while I sleep. And this is a marvellous feat in itself because I barely ever sleep. But seriously, I stay in my Hobbit hole all the time??? WHERE ARE YOU ALL EVEN COMING FROM???
- My 2yo niece keeps micromanaging my life. Like if I’m fixing her a snack, she’s walking behind me going “BUT GET A BOWL CAIT. BUT CUT THE APPLE CAIT. WHERE IS MY BISCUIT CAIT.” Like I don’t know how to fix a snack, omg. She makes up for it by complimenting me though. Every time she sees me she says, “I like your shirt, Cait.” And if that doesn’t melt my cold dead heart, what will.
- Speaking of nieces, there’s a family resemblance, don’t you think? I think so.
- People keep asking me for writing tips and I dON’T KNOW HOW. No seriously. How do you write. I have no idea. There is no way for me to blank faster on any tips I’ve learned than to be asked “can you tell me how to outline???” DUDE. I CAN’T. Hats off to all of you blogs about writing advice. I’m about as coherent as a dead turtle in soup trying to make a bid for freedom.
- You know how people say “things are better shared with someone you love”?? They obviously didn’t mean cake.
- There are only SIX books on my “best of 2017 shelf”. That seems pitiful considering it’s already nearly June???? 2017, please step up your game. However, they are:
I can’t even with how much I love them though. CAN’T EVEN.
- I’ve officially read 111 books this year! Because I’m stress-reading and have no life!!
- I was interviewed on Bookstr which was pretty exciting!! They gave me a pretty lovely write up on how #FABULOUS I am, which I was sooo not expecting and it kind of made my day. Plus 3K shares on facebook?!?????? Dude. I’m famous. I don’t even know why but I accept.
- Contemporary novels are WAY harder to write than fantasy. Pfft to whoever says fantasy is hard. HAHAAHHA. No. You try writing a contemporary when you homeschooled, have never been to hospital, aren’t romantic, a wild night equals losing your book amongst your bed covers and having to search for it, and 86% of your humour is derived from Lemony Snicket and tumblr memes. Someone pls remove me from being an author before I damage something.
- I’ve also been thinking about…how the more followers I get, the less people think I’M A REAL PERSON. Which is nonsense. I don’t have a face, but I’m still real and I have feelings. I have at least 3 of them. Maybe even 4 on a good day, like Tuesdays. Having a lot of followers shouldn’t equal people assuming they can be rude. I care about you all just as much as I did when there were 5 of you.
- Why don’t people like pineapple on pizza???? I…do?? #EqualLoveForPineapples
- My bullet journal is sTILL not writing itself. I’m so done with its rudeness. And it’s also getting monstrously thick, even though I’ve done like 10 pages all up…because I keep using scrapbook paper to hide the fact I can’t art. Or write. What is handwriting. How does one do it.
Me: *zentangles half a thing*
Me: *gets tired halfway thru and abandons ship*
Me: *tries to do a rainbow page with watercolour pencils*
Me: *goes to paint it and realises they were not watercolour pencils*
Me: Ok that’s my art quota filled for the next 65 years.
- Writing is all fun and games until your family asks to read it. It is 6000 x easier to query and sign with an agent and work with professionals than it is to pry a book out of my cold dead paws and hand it over to my family to read. I LOVE YA, FAMILY, BUT THE PRESSURE. DO I LOOK LIKE A RICE COOKER TO YOU? NO. GOD SAVE THE QUEEN AND ALSO ME, THANKS.
My writing life has been INSANE this year.
I’ve been escapism-writing because THIS YEAR HAS BEEN STRESSFUL. So far I’ve written: 8 outlines and 3 novels for a collective of 500,000 words. How? We don’t know.
And I’m so so so so excited for a project I just finished outlining. I’ve mentioned it here and there in monthly recap posts but it’s basically the BIGGEST project I’ve ever tackled. It’s an adult fantasy 5-book series about two con artist brothers who decide to rob 5 countries to distract everyone from going to war. Which goes about as well as you’d think with MEEEEE being the author. [insert evil author glee here] It’s huge, peoples. It’s huge. The 5th book outline was 40,000 words and I think my brain removed itself to Guadeloupe to recover. It’s sassy and full of heist plots and it’s super super dark and I’ve never been more proud of something since I learned how to say “gnat” without pronouncing the “g”.
NOW I NEED TO WRITE IT SO SO BADLY. I’M 99% SURE IT IS THE KIND OF PROJECT THAT WILL NEVER SELL. BUT I’M SO SO PROUD OF IT AND I DON’T EVEN CARE.
And I 100% believe it’s okay to write things for yourself. Because, well, WHO KNOWS if a miracle might happen and you become a bestseller and HBO turns it into the next Game of Thrones 6-season show. But also: everything you do improves your writing. And also helps you to discover just how mean you can be to your characters.
Spoiler: I can be very mean.
I’m considering doing a full post to tell you about so let me know if you’d like that too. SO MUCH COMMENT BRIBERY TODAY. WOW, CAIT.
OTHER PROJECTS I’M HALF WORKING ON:
- I’m editing my contemporary Goldilocks retelling. It’s going about as well as pouring honey on my head and running into a wall.
- Possibly working on another contemporary. This one about a boy who nearly dies, only to return to his hometown and discover his BFF wrote a book starring him, but killed him off at the end and she’s now famous for it and this is severely awkward.
- Half toying with the idea of an immortal who is 50000% sick of being a teen. I mentioned this idea in my recent IDEA BRAIN EXPLOSION POST and it’s caught me so bad.
- Slightly despairing because these are all the ideas I have to write:
I need a holiday from myself.
And before you ask whether I’m a writing machine, or never sleep, or how do I find time? The answer is: exactly.
But the important part? Writing makes me happy [insert me strangling part of brain that is screaming about lies] and excited. SO SO EXCITED. I can’t even with how excited I get about my projects. So I know I’m doing something write. HA HA GET IT? RIGHT = WRITE???
Yes I’ll show myself out.
Hiatus? Just a smidge.
I may have posts scheduled??? But I will be sparse online until I’m moved in. Feel free to comment, email, message — ALL THE THINGS. I’ll get back to you! I’LL MISS YOU, ARGENTINA. Try not to burn down the moon while I’m going because firstly: rude. And secondly: that’s my job.
woah enormous post, oKAY SO I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THAT LIFELY UPDATE. and let me know if you move house often??! also to the writers: do you have any upcoming projects that you’re BUSTING OUT OF YOUR BRAINS with excitement for? what has been everyone’s top reads of 2017??? and is soap shaped like cakes a tragic insult: yes or no?