Just in case you were having a good day, I’m here to write a post full of no-good-very-bad-torturous-stressful-decisions.
And I’d like to say YOU’RE WELCOME, in advance, for all the upcoming crying.
Because it’s time to do a fun little “this or that” tag, which I’m partially adapting from a bookstagram monthly challenge hosted by @book_junkee and partially making up as I go along because who needs logic lol lol not us. I’m going to make you pick “between two poisons”, so to speak. Plus a few hard ones because both-options-are-so-fun. And you can vote on the polls! #EXCITING
And totally feel free to snabble this for your own blog! I’d say “steal” but I LITERALLY JUST GAVE YOU PERMISSION. But you can steal it if you want to wear a pirate hat and feel nefarious. I won’t criticise you.
1. SERIES OR STANDALONE
Now at first glance this doesn’t seem like a huge decisions — but I’m saying you can only CHOOSE ONE FOREVER. (Hypothetically.) Well here comes the rice cooking pressure pot.
Some series get awful as they go along and you’re quietly yelling “jUST STOP” and waving your hands around. But then some standalones are so so not enough????
MY PICK: Ughhhhh I’m already TORTURED and we’ve only just started (gee @ me, great post why don’t ya). I will pick series though because most of my top favourite books are series. But I aCHE.
2. MAGIC EARNED OR MAGIC BORN
Do they START with all the powers of the known universe squashed in their little skull or do they have to collect power as they scream through their adventure??? I used to roll my eyes at the Chosen One trope, but there are some chosen ones I kind of freaking adore. Like Kell from A Darker Shade of Magic. But they can get so so annoying…um excuse me while I cough at Celeana from Throne of Glass and Alina from the Grisha books. (I’M SORRY.)
MY PICK: I go with magic earned. (I’M SORRY, KELL.) I just prefer to see people who want their powers and work at them instead of whining about the HARDSHIP of being so SPECIAL. (Someone give me magic powers. I will show you!) *
* NOTE: PROBABLY DO NOT DO THIS IF YOU DON’T WANT ME TO ACCIDENTALLY VAULT OUR PLANET INTO THE SUN BECAUSE I NEVER READ THE INSTRUCTION MANUAL.
3. ENEMIES-TO-LOVERS OR FRIENDS-TO-LOVERS
Ahhh okay this is hard! I actually love both these tropes. (Fun reminder: tropes aren’t necessarily bad!) I always feel like “friends-to-lovers” are ships that will last?! But “enemies-to-lovers” usually contains SNARKY BANTER. And I love banter almost as much as I love cake. Woooah what a confession.
MY PICK: I’m not kidding THIS IS HARD. But because I’m forcing myself to choose (who wrote this frikkin’ post)…I’ll go enemies-to-lovers.
4. HILARIOUS BANTER OR EMOTIONAL RUIN
Because what is a book if it doesn’t hurt, hmm? My most FAVOURITE books in all the world are always the ones that stab me in the feels once. Or twice. Or in the case of Sally Green and the Half Bad trilogy — 19 TIMES PER PAGE. THANKS FOR NOTHING JUST GO I’M A WRECK.
But I literally just finished saying how much I like banter. I am distressed here.
MY PICK: I’m going to go the emotional ruin???? Even though I love banter so much???? Because the books that stay with me forever always make me angst a little. Or a lot. Or forever, you know, normal stuff.
5. LOVE TRIANGLE OR INSTA LOVE
I kind of hate them both. I literally sigh and turn into a bucket full of cringe whenever a love triangle comes frolicking out of the woodwork. cAN YOU CHILDREN JUST NOT MAKE UP YOUR MINDS. THIS IS NOT AN ICE CREAM BUFFET. However, instalove feels like (a) lazy writing, and (b) it’s so unconvincing?! Two people “destined” for each other in 3 chapters sort of makes my eyeballs roll inside out.
MY PICK: Love triangle. HA. It’s not even close. I will die on a triangle over instalove. (And actually I like Cassandra Clare and Maggie Stiefvater’s triangles?? But they are the exception.)
6. KEYBOARD-SMASH FANTASY NAMES OR ALL NAMES START WITH SAME LETTER
I’m actually not sure which is more confusing at this point?! Characters named Alioueu’ri Kytia (I legit just hit my keyboard ha!) or everyone’s names starting with A or M or something. It messes me up every. single. time. I once read a book with characters named Sal and Sam and THAT’S JUST SO NOT FAR OK. No one reads a full name sheesh. I just read the first two letters of a word and frolic on.
MY PICK: ughhhhhhh. I’m actually going for the keyboard smash names. At least I can vaguely remember the collection of letters??
* Just to clarify: my issue is when the WHOLE CAST has really typical names. Like I in my debut, I have a “Joey” (pretty normal) but also an “August” (not so normal). BALANCE.
7. MEAN PARENTS OR DEAD PARENTS
Both are super cliche these days. Do I write both? Yes I do! I’m so sorry! GIVE ME CAKE AND I’LL DO BETTER. Ahem. But least to say parents are a great source of angst and tension in YA books, because teens are still (usually) pretty dependant on them. But you also have to sort of…you know…scoot them out the way so the teen can still have an adventure. Apparently. Let’s not let parents be too helpful or anything. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
MY PICK: I prefer writing mean parents but reading dead parents. IF YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE YOUR POISON.
8. SUPERMODEL LOOKS OR CONSTANTLY SAYS HOW “PLAIN” THEY ARE
I’m just smacking us in the face with HORRIBLE TROPES, aren’t I?! I’m so so over both of these, ha! I do not understand how books have so many ripped and extraordinarily good looking teens. Um, raise your hand if you spent your teenage years looking like an upside-down avocado skin??? Because: me. Also you sort of have to work out to have a super fit body. I’M JUST SAYING.
But I find it equally irritating when the girl is like: “I’m so boring with my boring brown hair and my boring brown eyes.” LIKE WHY IS THAT BORING??? FFFFSSPFPF. It’s just underlining this idea that blue-eyed/blonde are more “beautiful” but they are just as nice as anything else?? Let’s settle down, white people.
MY PICK: I almost pick supermodel!? Because at least they don’t WHINE ABOUT IT. I just have to go through reading them being called “hot” 50 times a minute. Sobbing.
9. FACE ON COVER VS TYPOGRAPHY ON COVER
This one is mean because my honest answer is BOTH. I mean !! I used to be all “ugh @ covers with faces” because I like to imagine people myself, thanks. But then YA book covers just got better. They’re seriously beyond gorgeous and sometimes my own face falls in love with them, ok??? This is natural. So dull stock cover photos of faces = ugh. But covers like Tyler Johnson Was Here, The Winner’s Curse, The Wicker King, Blue Lily Lily Blue???! LOVE.
But I also adore typography so much. I’m just going to cry ok. This is a horrible decision.
MY PICK: Booooth. Okay I’m cheating! I have to choose. Um…typography. But yettttt…
10. VILLAIN TURNING A LITTLE GOOD OR HERO TURNING A LITTLE BAD
I swear these are THE TROPES OF MY HEART. If you even remotely hint that a book has these in them…boom. I am there. I am living there. I have bought snacks and blankets so I never have to leave. I just love how it complicates everything?! Plus it’s such a good exploration of what “good” vs “bad” really means and all the grey area.
Heck um…I have to pick now…dangit.
MY PICK: Probably villain-turning-a-little-good like Kaz Precious Terrifying Brekker. But then Julian Blackthorn (from Lady Midnight) being super good but doing super sinister things …omgggg. I just need both here.