The world is full of magnificent wild creatures like emperor penguins, jaguars, and book bloggers.
Most people know how to approach emperor penguins (you dance I guess, I’ve seen Happy Feet) and jaguars (you put herbs in your hair and other seasonings and pre-prepare yourself because you’re about to get eaten, mate). But book bloggers??? People get SO CONFUSED about how to treat us. It’s not that hard. But yet you rarely come across a book blogger who doesn’t have a frustrated story of being treated badly.
Therefore it’s time for a handy guide.
Before we go on though, a little FAQ about book bloggers in general:
✧ Do book bloggers bite? Yes.
✧ Can you poke them with a stick and survive? No they will bite the stick and then bite you.
✧ What happens if you put them in direct sunlight? This is actually ok. They will take book photos.
✧ Can I tap the glass? No. What’s wrong with you.
✧ What do they eat? You can throw small delicious cakes at them. No lettuce. If not vegan, they may eat the hearts of those who mock YA books.
✧ Do they have odd habits? They sometimes tunnel under piles of books and rest there indefinitely.
✧ Do they make good friends/companions/pets? Yes, they actually do, they are very intelligent and loyal and kind, and also: if you leave your pantry open they will eat all your cereal
1. WHEN YOU SEE ONE IN THE WILD, REMEMBER (A) THEY HAVE A NAME, AND (B) THEY ARE A PERSON.
This means that, no, we are not a faceless platform or company. We are a very smol person behind a phone or laptop, probably covered in toast crumbs, most likely typing frantically 2 seconds before we meant to post. And we have feelings. A lot of them. That is why we blog.
It’s also not hard to find a blogger’s name! Most of us will have an “About Page”. Or at the bottom of a post there will be a signature. Or check our social medias! It makes a 10000% difference to be talked to BY NAME. It means you actually care who you’re talking to.
FUN FACT: Someone’s it’s ok to get names wrong. For instance, I’ve received an email addressed to NICK FURY before and I’m ok with that.
UNFUN FACT: Just saying “Hello” (with no name following) if you’re randomly emailing a blogger is a HUGE red flag. It says you’ve never so much as looked at our blog. At all. When I get emails like this and I’m already saying “byyyyyyyeeeee”.
2. NEVER TELL A BLOGGER WHAT THEY “SHOULD” BE DOING.
Because the fact of the day is (a) we aren’t paid, (b) we do this FOR FUN which means we can do what we want, and (c) look if someone tells me to do something, my interest in doing it goes down by 87%.
3. SERIOUSLY THO…WE AREN’T PAID.
That means our time is absolutely golden and valuable and RARE. We squeeze blogging in amongst our dayjobs or school or other things we want to do in free time.
And no, getting free books isn’t payment. I mean (very roughly) you might spend 3-4 hours reading, then 1 hour writing a post, then 1 hour formatting the post and finding gifs and taking photos and making graphics and emailing publicists and promoting the post…dude, that was just 6 HOURS WORK FOR A BOOK MAYBE WORTH $15. If you get given a product (like a book) to advertise, then that’s what you’re doing! Advertising a free product! It’s not paid!
(Also this DOESN’T MEAN we are ever ungrateful to receive free books! I’m just simply talking about payment.)
UNFUN FACT: I have had publicists (freelance? IDK) inquire if I’d promote a book for them. I’ve had to say no because the book didn’t interest me or I’m too busy etc etc. And then they’ve gone on and asked me to round up other book bloggers to do the promotions. This makes me SO MAD. I am BUSY. That is YOUR JOB THAT YOU ARE LITERALLY HIRED FOR. Unless you want to pay me to suddenly be a publicist for a day?! DO NOT DO THIS.
4. WE DO THIS BECAUSE WE LOVE IT. WE SERIOUSLY DON’T OWE ANYONE ANYTHING.
This is freeing. Be freed by this, you little sprite. Any part of blogging you don’t like? DON’T DO IT. Any part you do like? DO IT AS MUCH AS YOU WANT.
Personally? I don’t like blog tours (unless I really know/like the author already)! I also don’t like organising blog events because it stresses me out. And I LOVE tags and memes, no matter if others say they’re cliche!! So I just go ahead and live my life my way. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
FUN FACT: This means we don’t owe people reviews or promo posts if it doesn’t work for us. This is our platform that we built????? I do not see the part where I OWE it to random people to now use my hard-worked-for-platform to promote them unless I want to.
5. SUPPORT BLOGGERS!! AS MUCH AS YOU CAN!!
This is what we THRIVE on ok. All of us! Big or small, it means a lot to us to have our readers’ love and support. Here are some examples:
✧ interact with us by leaving a comment or tweeting!
✧ don’t be shy shhh seriously we love talking to you
✧ share their posts
✧ feed them pie
✧ comment on each other’s work (something I try to do! If you comment here –> I always try to visit you back!)
✧ don’t be scared to congratulate each other for milestones (a little “hey congrats on your blogversary!” is lovely for anyone!)
✧ you’re not annoying or “too small” to talk to
6. DON’T GET MAD AT THEM ABOUT GIVEAWAYS!
This peeves me SO MUCH when people roll out their: “OH BLOGGERS DON’T CARE ABOUT INTERNATIONAL READERS. THEY’RE SO SELFISH.”
Dude, we are so not rich!?
I would love to giveaway more books or send my friends an ARC I don’t want. I cannot freaking afford it. (I can only afford books because I freelance blog for a bookstore and get review-copies from publishers!!!) So no, I haven’t forgotten INT readers. I feel constantly guilty for not being inclusive…but bloggers are not being mean when they do this!! This is all out of pocket.
7. BE RESPECTFUL OF BLOGGERS’ SPACE.
This one I’m struggling with because I am an author now. And I feel like I should get the heck out of the blogger world in case I see negative reviews of my book or people feel stifled reading my work because I’M LURKING. I don’t mean to lurk!! But I love blogging! I am in the midst of a messy divorce with myself apparently!!
But seriously, censorship? Can we not. Authors shouldn’t tell bloggers what to think/say about their book.
Bloggers shouldn’t do this to EACH OTHER too. I have had people message me completely randomly to say: (1) I am trash for owning a book they didn’t like, (2) I should rearrange my opinion about a book because I’m wrong, (3) I am problematic for not having read a certain diverse book yet.
I wish I was jokinggggg but I’m not.
8. DON’T ASSUME YOU KNOW A BLOGGER!
We don’t HAVE to be super personal on our blogs. And I chaff at this because there’s a lot of identity and diversity policing that goes on. This genuinely happens to me:
Me: This book has problematic autism rep.
Other Blogger: Well you’re wrong!! mY COUSIN is autistic and I loved this book!!
Me: Well...I am autistic…and this is problematic rep. And having an autistic cousin doesn’t make you an expert on what autistics feel.
Other Blogger: [blocks me]
I’M SO TIRED SOMETIMES. I shouldn’t have to list my credentials to avoid getting attacked. ALSO this goes for all bloggers! We don’t need to state our finances. Or ages. Or how much time we do/don’t read. Don’t assume a blogger is/isn’t part of a minority. Don’t assume anyone has an easy or perfect life either!!
The overall thing to do when approaching a blogger in the wild?! RESPECT THEM.
So simple!! Yet so forgotten sometimes!!
If you want to work with bloggers, TREAT US LIKE PEOPLE. And don’t make friendships just to get something out of it. Make friends with bloggers because we’re awesome and passionate and have a fun hobby absolutely dedicated to sharing books. Which is pretty epic!!
ok tell me your blogger “horror stories”!? annoying emails you’ve been sent? trolls you’ve had to deal with?? do you get enough cake?? have you had people assume things about you? let us rant therapeutically.
PS. My blog is no longer sending out emails…wHIcH is a technically difficulty that is breaking my hEART. (Bloglovin’ subscriptions are still working though!) So if you happen to be subscribed through email, can you let me know if you are/are not getting emailed my posts like normal?? (I always post Saturday/Monday/Tuesday.)
Can I just say it is still sinking in that a real life author talks to me!?!? I loved ATPN, and it makes me so happy to chat with you!
Also, this post was YES! I don’t even use my real name with blogging (Rhiana is an alias 😂) and some still think they get me. I SHARE WHAT I WANT TO SHARE WITH WHOM I WANT TO SHARE. PROBABLY NOT YOU. (seriously, I’m quite private)
Rhi xxx
P.S. I have a book review coming up and I literally CANT WAIT!
Rhiana recently posted…october journal // out of this world
Omg you are the SWEETEST 😂💛💛It’s so lovely chatting with you too!!
It isn’t hard to find our names on our blogs though, right?! It takes like 2 seconds of clicking and reading and shows so much respect!
THANK YOU SO MUCH!
Yes! All you have to do is go to our about page or even just a recent post! Not too hard 🤷♀️
A much needed post! Seriously I never understood why people don’t bother to look for a name when sending emails. Like that takes two seconds and makes all the difference!
And no, no one feeds me cakes! What am I doing wrong?! Although my new flat mate gives me cookies sometimes so that’s a start 😍
And I hate all the assumptions people are constantly making and why they can’t accept that people have different opinions. Like I know especially with mental health rep it can be pretty hard, I usually see it with eating disorders as that is what I know most about, and two people can have very different reactions to the rep in the book. And both are valid if the person personally struggled with it (3rd cousin doesn’t count!) but for some reason it’s always only one that people think can be right. And if it’s handled with respect (and I don’t think anyone who has personal experience with the topic would say it’s good rep if it wasn’t handled with respect) then it is bound to represent some more then others. People don’t have all the same experiences! Can’t we stop to tell each other that we’re wrong?
And listen if it isn’t something we personally deal with instead of attacking?
Fortunately my blog is still so small so I don’t really get trolls or people trying to correct my opinions.
But I see it all around and it’s a reason why I’m not more in twitter and why I haven’t posted any discussion yet. It freaks me out a bit. I don’t have the energy to fight with people on the internet.
This was supposed to be a light hearted comment .. I don’t think I managed that 😅
Great post as always! 🧡🖤
Oh and I didn’t get an email but now I know why and I’ll check regularly for new posts ☺️
Yes yes exactly!! Like I almost instantly delete emails that start with just “hello” and no name, because I know they don’t even care. And they’re usually like “review my adult spy thriller”….grrr. THREE SECONDS looking at my blog will tell you I’m YA!! I definitely think you deserve more cakes too though. How is it that we bloggers do not get more cakes than everyone else!?? We have needs here omg.
And yes yes I totally agree about rep and interpretations! A lot of people think there is ONE interpretation and ONE way to write something. But it’s not true! Like I’ve hated a book’s anxiety rep before (having an anxiety disorder myself) but then read a review where a friend (Also with anxiety) absolutely LOVED it. We have to remember we’re not a hive mind. We can fit one label but have different experiences. (Something I need to remind myself when writing reviews too!!) Although I do reckon we need to be cautious calling something “good rep” if we have zero experience. 😂Although again, I AM guilty of having said that in reviews, so I need to phrase it like “the rep seemed good to me” or something like that.
Discussions are scary. But MOSTLY people are nice!! Which is a relief.😂💛
I’m glad you enjoyed this!! (And hopefully I’ll fix the email issue soon gah.)
I relate to this very hard. It particularly frustrates me when I get direct messages on my social media (Instagram, Twitter, goodreads) from an author or someone promoting their book that they want me to read. It’s usually an automatic no if that happens, honestly. I’ll be friendlier and more polite if they take the time to email me via my blog and learn my name (and I said yes to Heart of Mist because I liked it and Helen did this!). Whew, respect, it’s a thing! 🙂
Rebecca Gough recently posted…Wildcard – Review (spoiler free)
Absolutely me too!! It’s not THAT hard to ask to be treated like a person and not get an automated message??? It builds interest/trust straight away. I feel WAY more inclined to say yes to someone who actually seems to care about talking to me!!
Respect is such a … wild thing, apparently. 😭😂
no bad stories, because i tell them i’m a pharmacist first. so i get visuals of all the rashes instead of being poked.
I hope you continue to not have any weird/bad stories then haha. *sends you cake anyway*
Seriously it really irks me when people just send me an email stating that “I am sending you a free copy to read” without even talking my permission! And yes, most of the time there is no name with HI. I don’t know who come they are so busy to even find a name and instead believe us to be so free to read their books without even knowing about that at all.
And it irks me more when people directly message me on social media accounts. Ans oh, especially on Goodreads. I have specifically mentioned my blog address everywhere so why don’t they spend some time over there and try to actually look that “I am not accepting review requests at the moment”
Ahh, all this is really frustrating and you have put it all there so well 🙂
Ugh if they can’t even bother to find our names…like what is this?! And to find my email address you have to CLEARLY see my “not open to review requests” sign and the amount of people who ignore it. Like it makes it awkward for me, because I don’t like saying no!!
I’ve also had someone ask me to buy their book and then promote it.😂 I mean, I get it. Author life is hard (I know!) but omg that is such bad form.😂
I’m glad you enjoyed this post though and we can all have a therapeutic rant together!
*hugs and offers cake* You sound like you need these right now.
I haven’t really had to deal with many of these issues, but that’s probably because I’m not specifically a book blogger; I’m a blogger who happens to talk frequently about books. I’m sorry you have to deal with them, though. People are frustrating, and sometimes the internet brings out the worst in them. 😛
(Also, though . . . did you really get an email addressed to Nick Fury? Really? Did the rest of the email imply the person knew who you were? I’m super curious now.)
*eats all the cake and shares some with you too* 😂😂
People are frustrating bleh. I guess they feel like I’m a “company” or something buT I’M NOT I’M JUST A PERSON HERE!! Floundering away with a hobby I enjoy!
And YES. I truly did get a post addressed to Nick Fury.😂 They did do it as a joke, but it definitely got my attention because I’d said something about Nick Fury in a recent post so I knew they’d read my blog. Like that was an immediate tick in the box!
I can’t belive there are publisher who asked me to round up other book bloggers to do the promotions. :O *gasp*
*pat your back*
Great post Cait! I love this! Totally relatable 😀
Hana Bilqisthi recently posted…The Wrong Side of Right by Jenn Marie Throne
I know right?! It was actually a publicist though and I think maybe a freelance one so not with one of the BIG houses. But it’s happened to me a couple of times and I’m still so confused!😂😂
Fantastic post! I’m lucky enough that I haven’t run into these issues yet (probably because my blog is on the smaller side), but ohhhhhh they sound SO frustrating. It’s baffling how entitled people think they are to other people’s time, especially their unpaid time. 😡
Btw, hope your email situation gets fixed! Heard about it through Twitter as well. Never fun to sort out! 🙁
It is endlessly frustrating right?! 😭And I hope you never have to experience them though!! *sends you extra cake anyway because you still deserve it*
(I’m emailing with the Jetpack support team so now to tinker around and hope I don’t accidentally destroy my whole blog. 😭😭)
Fingers crossed but I won’t hold my breath (and I do appreciate extra cake lol).
😱 Good luck!!
I’M NOT GETTING YOUR EMAILED POSTS AND I’M SO UPSET. I just learned about your jetpack problem yesterday and I found out I missed lots of your posts. HOW CAN LIFE DEPRIVE ME OF YOUR AWESOMENESS??? This is not okay. I don’t even have time to catch up because school is slowly tearing my soul into shreds. (I have two major exams tomorrow and I obvs shouldn’t be online but I couldn’t resist)
So I will just say this: I LOVE THIS POST SO MUCH. I have probably said that a lot of times but I think this might be my most favorite PaperFury post. BOOK BLOGGERS DESERVE THIS KIND OF CONTENT AND APPRECIATION TBH.
Actually I always feel pressured when authors send me their books and ask me to review them. I want to support authors especially if they’re self-published but sometimes the books just don’t get my attention and I DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW TO DECLINE. It annoys me too when it’s obvious that some authors/publishers don’t even make an effort to get to know me and my blog first before requesting.
I DON’T GET ENOUGH CAKE TOO. OR CHOCOLATES. WHAT IS THIS INJUSTICE. I’m glad to be a part of this community though. My life has changed a lot when I started blogging and I have to thank you for everything. You’ve been my number one inspiration with reading and blogging and I’m so thankful. THANK YOU SO MUCH CAIT.
I gained a lot of blogger friends too and they’re just too precious for me. I LOVE THE BOOK BLOGGING COMMUNITY SO MUCH.
BLAME JETPACK. I’M SO UPSET. 😭😭I didn’t even like DO anything?! I’m just chugging along here as normal and then suddenly it stopped emailing me so I’m like??? That is quite odd. And then I realised it wasn’t emailing anyone so. *throws several things*
But omg good luck with the exams. *Sends encouraging cake*
And knowing how to decline is HARD tho. I’ve been blogging for like 7 years and I still freak out about how to say no. 😂 And I hate feeling like I’m just here to be used?! Like I built this platform and made tons of friends and am putting out content that I like…for me! I want to support/promote books, but I don’t want to feel like a *thing* to use, if that makes sense.😂 You deserve more cake. YOU DO.
I’ve never been given cake! How sad.
Morgane @ Bookworms Eat Brains recently posted…Favourite Book Quotes
my blog is tiny, yet somehow I still get plenty of emails asking me to review a books, and then getting upset with me when I say I’m not interested. The worst one I’ve gotten went on and on about how they were giving me this “exciting privilege” and they took the time to email me when they could have emailed someone else. um ,yeah, feel free to ask anyone but me. lol people are fun.
Luckily I haven’t had too many of these? I get a lot of unsolicited emails from authors asking me to review my books, but I haven’t had any that haven’t referred to me by name! I often have to turn review requests down because of Uni and people have been pretty good about that. It does irk me that most of the emails I get are for books in genres that I specifically say I don’t take, like I got a request to review a non-fiction book and it’s like if you had taken more than two seconds to check out my blog, you would realise that I’m a fiction blogger! I feel a bit bad about not being able to do giveaways but I’m a student and can’t really afford it, but I haven’t had anyone hound me about that. I don’t know if it’s just that I’m a relatively small blogger that I haven’t had to deal with most of this or what, but I’m grateful!
Jo recently posted…Top Ten Tuesday #181
I just now realized that I’m not receiving e-mails for the blog as usual and I’m devastated – but on the plus side I had a very entertaining train ride, because I used it to catch up on what I missed on here 😁
YES! Everybody who interacts with a blogger should read this post! I get a lot of weird emails. Someone recently called me Mr. Read, which isn’t my name but probably should be. A self-published author once offered me $5 to post a 5-star review of his book. I get so many emails from children! They all contain essay questions that are obviously copy/pasted from homework. People are weird.
Aj @ Read All The Things! recently posted…Mini Reviews: Psycho || The Snowman
This post is SO GREAT! I think there needs to %100000000 more respect for bloggers in general. People don’t respect the opinions of others anymore and it’s so annoying. This is the whole point of a blog. For bloggers to share THEIR experience with certain things (ie books.) I personally love reading your book reviews because they are quite comical, and I feel you give a really good description of what books are about. I’m trying to read more diverse books, and I so appreciate you give her honest opinion on whether there was good rep or not.
Also, small blog horror story. Sometimes I post short stories I have written on my blog. So one time I shared the link on Facebook, and this dude commented and basically told me how it should have ended -_- So that’s always fun. Also have had people tell me my opinion is wrong. HAHAHA IT’S FINE.
Sadly, I am not receiving email updates for the blog 🙁
Moya recently posted…Breathe Writers Conference
People can have different opinions obviously. They can like a book or dislike a book but they should express their opinions at least in a respectful manner. Like no need to hate bloggers for liking/ disliking books.
Also bloggers shouldn’t feel like they just NEED to do something just because other people are doing it.
Also can’t people just be respectful and supportive??!
Great post’ Cait!! 💞
Aditi @Dreamy Reads recently posted…Shipping: Why I can hate it sometimes and makes me run away from it (ft. a small list of why it makes me happy sometimes)
Great post, Cait. I even read it to my hubs. 🙂 I haven’t had many terrible experiences but I’ve had an author hound me and I’ve had an author make digs at my review. So authors behaving badly. Hmm. And I’ve had a few people on GR attack me. What I like most is your last statement….treat book bloggers with respect. If we all treated each other with respect the world would be a much friendlier place, no?
Aww I’m so sorry to hear about all the rude people 😞😞 Because I’m not a blogger, I sadly can’t identify, but I hope people start treating you with the respect you’ve earned!!
This list was really good tho, and I learned a lot!! Have a fabulous day Cait!!!!
I absolutely love this post, Cait, and I am going to shout about it from the rooftops! I thought it was going to be one of your comedy posts at first, but then I found myself nodding along!
There is a freelance publicist who wants all bloggers to reply to every single email, even if it’s to say no. Which I think is a waste of my and their time. I think they should only care about the yeses. I tend to only reply to bulk emails if it’s to say yes, I don’t reply to say no. Yet this publicist will chase and chase for an answer. And then chase and chase for a review. It’s tiring. I don’t know how many times I’ve sent them a link to my review policy stating that I don’t review to a deadline. I’ve pretty much decided I’m just not going to work with them any more.
I get sick of the emails from people that just say “hello”, but also those one that go, “I found your blog, URL” rather than “I found your blog, Paper Fury”. Just an obvious, quick cut and paste job, and it just shows a distinct lack of respect to me. Look at my blog, look up my name, use my blog’s name. It’s not hard.
And another one that isn’t strictly blogger related, it can happen to anyone with a Goodreads account. When I am reading a book I discover is problematic and decide to DNF, and give reasons/when I’ve read the whole book, but it’s problematic, so leave a negative review/put a book I’ve heard is problematic on my “will never read” shelf with a note to self as to why…. the bloody trolls come out. Like, I’ve clearly stated why I DNF’d/thought it was problematic/what I heard was problematic about it. Why are you telling me I’m wrong? Or that I’m a crappy reader? Or I’m not getting the depth or the nuance? And generally insult me as a person because I didn’t finish/didn’t like/won’t read a book you did? It’s bloody pathetic, and it’s draining, and, at times, actually hurtful. I know they say “don’t engage the trolls”, but I think, well, maybe I didn’t explain myself clearly enough, and go into it further. But they don’t want to listen. Look at my DNF “review” for Cold Iron, and the comments that follow, especially “Aurora”‘s comment. It’s just plain rude. I started the book, I found it problematic, I decided not to continue, I give reasons for not continuing – mostly for myself in case I forget – and I get abuse for it. Especially as a book blogger, where I try my hardest to be fair, and to see the nuance and complexity. And what makes it worse is I know I’m not wrong; I DNF’d, but I spoke to someone who carried on, and they were finding numerous issues with it throughout. I pride myself on being a fair and just book blogger, and I’m being called sanctimonious and that I have an inability to understand nuance. This isn’t a job, but it is something I’m hugely passionate about, and being dragged… it’s just really upsetting.
Sorry for the torrent of crap there, ha. You didn’t need all that detail. But it’s just so bloody unfair! But yes, a wonderful post, Cait! I love it! I may even, if you don’t mind, link to your post in my review policy? Thanks for the post!
Wow. What a perspective that needed to be shared, Cait! Thank you for your transparency. You have a way of calling people out on their sh*$ that is kind and hilarious, yet serious and forthright. I admire you!!
One of the most annoying yet frequent conversations I have:
Me: I run a book blog.
Person: I don’t read blogs.
Me: *internally* And I don’t like talking to people. Yet here we are.
Excellent points, Cait. I had no idea some of those were even a thing (who even has time for hate mail?), but I definitely agree that bloggers make good friends!
Azelyn Klein recently posted…The Horror in Fiction
Okay so this post lowkey made me want to cry?? I loved it so much. So much of this needed to be said (in your humorous voice, of course). I’m a smol blogger so I don’t experience TOO much friction … and yet???? I still do. I see it happen to other bloggers also and I just … it’s sad, frend. Thanks for this post! (And the laughs, lol)
If I was addressed as Nick Fury, I probably wouldn’t even correct them. I’d just go with it.
People who think book bloggers (especially well-known ones) owe them something are the WORST. Why would they just want to use them instead of being friends with them??? Being friends with book bloggers is tons of fun and I’d much rather comment and gush about books then demanding they promote something for me and getting mad when they don’t. Who are these people??
Oof, diversity policing is so tricky, especially online, because you literally have NO CLUE how someone identifies unless they tell you. People need to take a breath and consider what they’re saying and if they know the person they’re talking to before they start spouting off. I’ve seen big blowouts over this especially when it comes to how people identify in the LGBTQ+ community. How is blogger A supposed to know that blogger B is bisexual if blogger B decides not to come out online? I reaaaallllyyy wish we could have civilized conversations about diverse books without everyone trashing everyone else. Maybe one day? 😛
Kate @ The Magic Violinist recently posted…The Furry Friend Tag (Because You Need More Pictures of Scout in Your Life)
I’m not a book blogger but I totally related to some of the points!
A publicist emailed me about a product that they wanted me to promote on the blog but they didn’t even bother using my name when it’s THERE IN MY WEBSITE NAME!
Lol.
It’s like basic courtesy is thrown out the window just because interactions are over the internet. I’m sorry you had to go through some terrible people who think they know better than you 🙁
Maria John Writes recently posted…Create a Science Fiction Book Cover For Free in Ten Minutes
I don’t get too many trolls, luckily, but one thing I get from time to time is emails from authors or agents/publishers looking for a review that refuse to address me by name. Either the email won’t have a name at all or it will address me as The Hermit Librarian. *sigh* It says right on my ABOUT page what my name is. Saying The Hermit Librarian doesn’t annoy me SO much, but it irks me that they don’t take the time to even LOOK at my page. ALSO ALSO, on my ABOUT page? It says when and/or if I’m even taking reviews! Please respect that! It’s in bold type, for crying out loud! There’s a big difference between my reaching out for a review if I feel I have the time and being slogged upon by unsolicited requests.
Harker DeFilippis recently posted…A Rockstar Book Tour Release Day Blitz: Court of Secrets by Dyan Chick
::Raises hand:: I am not getting emails, so sad. And I am signed up on two different email addresses because I love you that much, so. Sorry about your technical difficulties! Good news is, I always pop on here every few days just in case I missed anything 😀
Anyway, this post could not be any more true and I LOVE IT. I seriously know people who have experienced EVERY one of these (and a lot of them, I have too!) I had a person unfollow me on all social media after I refused to take Nevernight off my TBR. Actually, I didn’t even refuse I just… didn’t say anything? (Because no?) I have had people TELL me (not ask, tell) to BUY their book and review it. Like okay Susan, that isn’t how any of this works. The international giveaway thing kills me because like- I already feel bad enough! But then it makes me feel defensive, too- kind of want to yell “right, let me skip paying my water bill this month so I can send ARCs to Antarctica, sounds reasonable”. Disclaimer: Most people are lovely. But still hah.
I love your point about doing what makes YOU happy with your blog. I tried so hard for so long to please everyone else. Now I just do what I want and it is SO freeing! Who cares if it’s at least 90% word vomit and The 100 GIFs?
Shannon @ It Starts at Midnight recently posted…Unreasonably Long Books I Actually Love
People have given you grief for owning a book they didn’t like?? That is so not cool! I’m pretty sure it’s not your responsibility to only associate with things random people approve of??
But anyway. Forget that. Sometimes I just look at your photos and I’m like “duuude that girl has a legit WALL OF BOOKS” and I’m pretty sure you could ACTUALLY build a castle out of them. Let me know if you figure that out because a castle of books would be basically the best.
Also I just want to add that it’s not that person’s responsibility to cater to anybody else’s opinions, either. I don’t want to be that person who hears about something that happens to a person I like (in this situation, that would be you) and automatically take sides against the “offender”. All clear? *nods*
This was a MUCH NEEDED post Cait. I loved it. Yes, please look at our names. We have real names. No, don’t tell us how to write a review. Most authors are supercool with good and bad reviews but some really blow the top. Once I had an author explain to me some facts in her book that I had quoted in a little negative sense. I didn’t change any aspect of the review since that should’ve come to me as a reader while reading and not after another additional explanation, right? I’ve seen some authors behaving really rude (Reemember the Jeann story? That was so horrible). Also agree! This is our platform so if a book does not give a right vibes we can choose not to put it out there (Unless it is a sponsored post but we all know having that as a book blogger is like sighting a dinosaur)
First of all, your header picture is so, so, so, so, so pretty, I’m in love.
Second of all, YES YES YES YES YES. This is such an important post, thank you for writing this and for sharing this. It always makes me a bit mad when I receive an email and clearly see that the person hasn’t even taken the time to look at my blog AT ALL. It’s pretty easy to see what kind of books we review and it is even easier to find out about our name – it’s polite and it just feels nice to be properly addressed in an email, too. And it especially frustrates me when people send emails when I clearly state that I am just not available at the moment.
I admit that I know I can get a bit sad about giveaways, but I do internally – seriously it’s just useless to scream at people AND like you perfectly said, people are not rich and I 200% get that. Shipping costs for all over the world are really WAY TOO BIG sometimes and I completely understand that people can’t afford that at all times. I do appreciate when there are some initiatives to use book depository to send a book to a wider audience, though, but that being said, people are always already SO NICE TO JUST DO A GIVEAWAY and that love alone makes me SO HAPPY to see, really!! that alone is already amazing, to have a generous community like that.
AND YES! Support book bloggers! We work hard, are not paid and we work really hard anyway!!! That matters a lot to me and I do my best to drop comments and little marshmallow-ey loves as much as I can to everyone I can because it matters <3
WONDERFUL POST <3
Marie @ Drizzle & Hurricane Books recently posted…Shattering Stigmas – Navigating Mental Illness and Culture
This post is obviously the best thing I’ve read all day.
And yes to all of it too.
I’m not actually sure if I put people’s names in my emails? But I only email bloggers I know well (to invite them to guest post or join in something) so I guess we’ve moved past the stage of needing to address by name. If I ever need to write to someone I don’t know particularly well, I’ll make doubly sure to include their name. 😛
Actually, I did once get an email from a fellow who was very polite, but didn’t address me by name and who asked to post on my blog. Like, no? This is a personal blog where I talk about my personal writing/life etc. Which you do not know about. And then he finished with “I look forward to working with you”. Nope, nope, nope. I mean the whole thing seemed a bit fishy anyway and I was scared it might be spam, so I never replied. But yeah…it was annoying. I invite people to guest post, not the other way round, please don’t sound so entitled! Thankfully, I think that’s the only time its happened.
That autism thing sounds so annoying. I don’t really do book reviews, but I have seen those sorts of things happening on Goodreads before and it sounds terrible. You know your experiences best and just because you (or the person attacking you ) don’t agree with a representation doesn’t mean its wrong, why can’t people understand these basic things?
Thankfully, most people are nice. Specially you, Cait 🙂
Chelsea R.H. recently posted…{Wattle Fire} Know The Novel and The Language of Worlds!
I don’t have my email address on my blog, but that’s very much because of how I view my blog and how I choose to blog. I want to be in control of who can contact me because I am a shy, paranoid bean. Before I had Twitter I was judged for not having a Twitter (it’s part of the reason I avoided Twitter for so long). I’ve also been judged for not requesting ARCs and not working to build up my stats. Although, I don’t think any of those other bloggers intended to come across as rude and judgemental. This is the internet. Sometimes tone is hard, and we come across as a bit more abrupt than we mean to.
Ivyclad Ideas recently posted…Inktober Week Two Wrap-up
I never get enough cake 🙁 haha but please feed me cake and pie and cereal!! What a great post! I love all the bullets but especially the giveaways and the not getting paid for this! Its my own money and I don’t want to spend $20 to ship this book out of the country when I could ship it for $3 within the continental US!! blah!!
Great post 🙂 this was fun to read!
Brittany recently posted…I’m back from my accidental mini hiatus!
Why are your blog posts always literally the best? Always.
*standing ovation*
Also to all these 3-4 hours to read a book bloggers… I thought I read fast, but compared to my blogger friends I read slow like the turtle. It takes me probably twice that for most books. Regardless, that’s not even minimum wage to read the book, let alone review and post, if you count cover price of the book as “payment.” BE NICE TO THE BLOGGERS. Also, cake.
There’s never enough cake. Ever.
Can I just say yes?? YOU ARE STANDING UP FOR US BOOK BLOGGERS AND I THANK YOU. Sadly I don’t get enough cake, but my mom is an excellent cake-baker so I’m always glad to get some. XD THOSE FAQ WERE THE BEST. XD XD <3
Wow, that is a minefield Cait. I didn’t realise all that kind of stuff happened or people treat bloggers so not nicely! Whoah. 🙁
The internet is wonderful, but also very strange and scary too….
So far in my round about a year of blogging my biggest problem has been trying to get people to comment without throwing myself at their feet, grabbing their ankles and begging them until they do! At first there was the excuse that it was actually kinda hard to find where to comment but it’s right under the post title now! Of course, being a blogger myself and experiencing this has made me clamp down on my own shyness and comment more on other’s blogs! I know how much comments can mean to someone now!
Very informative, and fun-in-parts post… Thanks for sharing… A writer friend posted this on Twitter. Saw it from there. Have a great week/weekend!!
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web developer Calgary recently posted…Top 6 Branding Trends in 2018
Oh Cait, you are QUEEN!! I literally laughed out load in my OFFICE (!!!) when I read “What happens if you put them in direct sunlight? This is actually ok. They will take book photos.” — I was hysterical! 😂😂😂 Thankfully, I haven’t had much bad experience for being a book blogger. Just the weird sounding “ooohs” and “aaahhhs” when I say that I am one. I mean, I don’t know how to treat them oohs and ahhs- are they affirming what I do or are they degrading it? Haha! I am not getting enough cake, that one is for sure!