It’s time to play Never Have I Ever…the author edition! Which means, we talk about both grammar and murder.
The normal author things, you know? 🤗 I’m pretty sure these are the two top most dealt with topics of authors worldwide anyway. And I love these types of tags! It’s interesting to know what kind of “writer stereotypes” we fall into. I usually hit a lot! My biggest author fail is not drinking coffee and rarely writing late at night. I make up for it by knowing far too much about how much blood you can lose. (A LOT. 10/10 DON’T RECOMMEND THOUGH.)
I also got this tag from Chelsea @ An Ordinary Pen’s blog, so go see her answers too!
started a novel that I didn’t finish
✓ ugh yes as of last year I have. I used to be so avid about starting what I finished, no matter what. Because you can always fix something in edits. You can’t fix what doesn’t exist!! But then 2019 came and it was just a year that felt like the equivalent of having raw soggy egg noodles tipped into your eyes. 🤗 I started two books and couldn’t finish them. (I want to go back someday though!)
written a story completely by hand
✗ this is a solid no. I can’t even write things on the shopping list without having a catastrophe. I wrote “potato flower” the other day and am ashamed.
changed tenses midway through a story
✓ only on accident! Like a phrase here or there. Recently I’ve switched to writing in past tense (I MISS PRESENT TENSE THOUGH) and it took me a while to get back into it.
not researched anything before starting a story
✓ um this is just my everyday 😂 I don’t do a lot of detailed research before doing a first draft, because otherwise I get bogged down on details I won’t even need. I do precursory research though. Recently I was googling eyes changing colour naturally (it happens!!) and the kind of birds most often kept as pets (google actually genuinely suggested a raw chicken and I just…have so many questions about this honestly).
changed my protagonist’s name halfway through a draft
✓ OH YES. Remember how I mentioned 2019 was cursed with unfinished drafts? I couldn’t name anyone!! I kept changing their names from chapter to chapter! It was a disaster on two legs! (Also fun fact: I can plot a whole book out and still not have the character names sorted. Names are HARD.)
written a story in a month or less
✓ back in my youth, I could write 30K a day ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 60K in 2 days. And even my “slow drafting” is still under a month. So least to say SOLID YES. (Although I am sad, but I can’t do that kind of intense focus anymore.)
fallen asleep while writing
✗ but I’m falling asleep writing this blog post tbh…not because it’s boring!! I am so tired. sO SO TIRED. I last slept in 1994 and this fact is catching up to me.
corrected someone’s grammar irl/online
✓ yes but only my family’s. I wouldn’t correct a stranger’s grammar! Half because, like, general politeness and people get tired and make mistakes. But also because sometimes English isn’t everyone’s first language?! Also WHO ACTUALLY CARES. If someone comments/messages me and the first thing they do is “correct” me, then there is zero chance of me feeling like connecting with them. 😒
yelled in all caps at myself in the middle of a novel
✗ no but I do that while writing outlines! during an actual novel, I’ve never left notes or anything. Just tear stains. 😌
used “I’m writing” as an excuse
✓ in fact I use this as an excuse when I am NOT writing too. It’s just a blanket excuse. Someone looks at me and I say, “Can’t. I’m writing.” Then I continue eating my snack and staring dead-eyed at a wall. Which is essentially writing anyway, so it’s fine.
killed a character that was based on someone I know in real life
✗ NO. I never never base characters on people I know! Maybe people I’ve seen (August’s style in A Thousand Perfect Notes is based off someone I saw at a library once) and of course I get influenced by habits and quirks of people in real life. But I don’t write real people into my books. 😫 It’s awkward enough to KNOW real humans, let alone write about them.
used pop culture references in a story
✓ Absolutely! I actually get confused when people actively try not to let their story be “dated”. It will be dated. It just will. Just mentioning instagram will date your story in 10 years. Also I kind of like picking up a novel written in the early 2000s and enjoying the older references. Your book is a product of YOUR TIME no matter what you do.
written between the hours of 1am and 6am
✗ I think I have to forfeit my writer-loyalty-card. 👀 I feel like most authors have followed a golden burst of inspiration into the wee hours of a morning? But I always go to bed at a normal time. (Do I sleep? No. I have insomnia. But at least my whingeing is muffled by pillows.)
drank an entire pot of coffee while writing
✗ I haven’t even drunk coffee while writing. At all. 😂 I am AWFUL at this author stereotype.
written down dreams to use in potential novels
✓ Sort of?? I’ve not written them down, but I’ve been inspired by dreams before and let it work into stories!
published an unedited story on the internet/blog/wattpad
✗ Death first, thank you.
forgotten to save my work/draft
✗ I’m pretty strict about this! And about backing everything up. Also GO BACK UP YOUR WORK RIGHT NOW.
typed so long that my wrists hurt
✓ YES and I don’t think it’s worth it, kids. 😫 Take care of YOUR BONES AND LIGAMENTS. Wow, I sound so so old these days. This is what happens when you turn 106.
spilled a drink on my laptop while writing
✗ NEVER. But I used to break my keyboard like 4 x a year from typing so much.
finished a novel
✓ I have finished exactly 35 novels in the last 10 years. 😌 Some of them are even good.
laughed like an evil villain while writing a scene
✗ the only time my face moves while I’m writing is when I’m accidentally trying out my character’s expression. Which probably makes me look like I ate a bowl of hysterical bees.
cried while writing a scene
✗ I’ve teared up but not technically shed the tears! I am notorious for not crying. But TWICE I have teared up: once for a sequel to a book I wish you could read. And once for the 6th book in this incredibly epic and windy fantasy series my teenage-self wrote, where I got to book 6 and was just like “How can I raise the stakes…oh! gonna kill absolutely freaking everyone.” I mean, okay, sure, 16-year-old-me. Where you working through some stuff.
created maps of my fictional worlds
✓ YES! I’ve gotten so into this! I downloaded programs and everything. And always quit because they looked tacky and I’m a perfectionist. 😂
researched something shady for a novel
✓ oh, isn’t this all of us?! I have done a lot: types of murder, how much blood can someone lose, scars, can you survive [insert near death experience here], poisonous plants, how long you can be unconscious for, stab wounds healing rates, survival chances of being walloped in the head. It’s like 😌 do I hate my characters here or something. Or do I just need readers’ tears to fill my morning coffee pot.
Feel free to take the questions for your own blog!! And tell me…
have you researched something shady for writing?! and do you struggle to pick character names?? 👀
Character names are the WORST and sometimes I want to kill the character off straight away just for being so hard to work with. And maps – would that we could all be arty enough to do our own?? because the programs are cool but uh never look like they do in my head.
also every time you remind us you are capable of completing a NaNoWriMo in two days, I have to kind of sit and stare at the screen and sigh for a while. How are you even real. (are you even real. I’d guess a dragon but how could you type 60k in two days if you had claws. magic??)
I recently had a dream with these face recognizing assassin foxes that had silver fur, and killed their victims by weeping venom into their eyes while they slept 😀 the first thing I did when I woke up was write it down, and then describe in great detail to my family, most of whom gave me concerned looks 😄
My main character has had at least two name changes, and I finally put up an Instagram poll for hr last name lol. XD
Most crazily, ~Olive
Good job writing that dream down, that’s wild! It’s always nice to hear other people have some pretty…interesting…dreams. 😉
I have 10/10 researched shady things for my novel. I was playing around with one idea where my POV character was a member of a rebellion and she served as a poison/toxicology expert in their “military”. It was pretty fun, not gonna lie.
I have researched so many weird things too xD Sometimes I type and apology in the search bar so if anyone ever looks at my history they’ll know I’m not insane xD
WOAH PAST TENSE I remember ye good olde days when you wrote a bunch of present tense xD but I’m glad you’re trying something (relatively) new xD
Also, quick question: people are asking if you actually exist and stuff, blah blah blah, but… aren’t you just a weeping angel? I mean it makes sense.
I hope you have the March of your dreams!
The staying up late thing to write is me, for my last nano project I stayed up until one thirty to finish the draft and cried, I have no regrets. I also I’ve never met a writer who didn’t have a weird search history, once I googled if opening a portal to another dimension is legal (fun fact: it is!)
Hi, this looks like such a fun tag! I will participate too. Love your answers… ♥
Have I researched something shady? Yep! I knew I’d probably reached a new low when I tried to find out how a body decomposes when it’s dumped in water.
Character names can be difficult at times. If I don’t start out knowing the name, I just use he/she until I figure it all out! 😉
i absolutely adore all of those questions and i will definitely (at one time in my internet life) answer them all myself lmao. i can’t name dates specifically but i’ll do it eventually — pinky swear. i envy you so!! hard!! for being able to write a whole novel in a month. that is wonderful and badass and so out of my league omg. i can’t even grasp that kind of power as a concept itself. like, you are a writing machine. the word wizard. the literature champion.
i have NOT researched anything shady yet for one of my started wips. heavy stressing on the ‘yet’ part, tho. also: i’m utterly lost when it comes to character names. i have, like, four names in my head that i just recycle for a lot of my stories. it’s like their all au’s of each other. just different versions of the same person or some multi verse/parallel universe kinda thing going on lmao. it’s quite frankly a problem. a huge one. a mess. chaos. i don’t know who gets to stay that name. who is the ultimate (insert one of the four archetype names)??? who gets to stay (insert one of the four archetype names) and who needs to become a different person?? who knows?? not me.
Have you tried the whole baby names website thing? There’s loads of them out there. Most give the meanings of a name but some also give strengths, weaknesses, famous people with that name, etc. In my current WIP I’ve been using a lot of family history as I discovered my two main families were French and German. So I needed French and German names. I try to use names I like the sound of but also whose meanings sound like my character or what I’m thinking my character my be like, what I want them to be like. Good luck!
I’v done so many of these! 😂 And I’ve researched so much that it’s not even ridiculous. I’ve looked up everything from the meaning of the Russian word “neva” (it’s “river” — so there is a river in Russia called “the River river” 😂) to sex positions. (Plz don’t ask!). I’ve looked up terminology for carpet fibre types, and what sort of tools vikings farmed with. Another weird writer thing I do that isn’t listed is Languages. I look up lexicons and language dictionaries and sites for root words to get all familiar with the language for the nationality I want to theme my book around. I’ve even taken Duo-lingo lessons strictly for this reason. It’s very satisfying. 😅
I have to agree with you, I’m generally expressionless when I write, UNLESS it is to work out an expression or to test how a line of dialogue sounds for a character!!! I’m so excited that someone else does that!! We are berry cool. (As Strawberry Shortcake would say XD)
I don’t think I’ve seen this tag before, but I was answering all the questions in my head, haha. I think the last shady thing I was researching was about being stabbed in the abdomen, which was basically another episode of “writer… or serial killer?” I feel a bunch of writers kinda sorta suffer from this slight issue XD
35 novels in the last ten years–WOW. WOWWWWWWWWW. WE STAN A LEGEND.
That’s why you are the Queen, O Paper Fury, and you always will be.
<3
I’m just going to point out that there IS such a thing as potato flowers, and it was clearly just your heart subconsciously yearning for your adoring fans to shower you in pretty flowers. *nods sagely* *throws bouquets of flowers at you*
Names ARE hard. Sometimes I just substitute random letters like XXX and come back later. You know, when I’m better equipped with, like, military grade armor and can maybe tackle that beast.
30K A DAY? I am … I have no words. There’s no words. Astounded doesn’t even begin to cover it. I consider 30k a month good for me. xD I am just not a fast writer.
I would be suspicious of anyone who HASN’T researched something shady for a novel. At one point, I had to research the stages of decomposition in detail. I’m pretty sure I’ve probably landed myself on a watch list or two … or I should’ve, based on my search patterns. xD
Ooh – this is a very cool tag! Yes, I’ve researched shady things for writing – let’s just say I have several stories that lean towards (read: are very) morbid and leave it at that… And I’m usually pretty good with character names. 🙂
I’ve definitely researched shady things for writing. One of my favorites was a series of google searches involving medieval methods of anesthesia… so that I knew what sort of poisons could be used to knock someone unconscious. I eventually settled on a mixture that included hemlock and opium, if anyone’s curious – but 17-year-old me combined with the power of Wikipedia probably wasn’t the best medical resource. 😉
I had such a fun time reading this! I’m super impressed that you’ve never lost a draft after not saving it. I’m pretty on top of constantly and consistently saving anything I write, but I’ve still had a few forgetful moments! And I change tenses all the time when I write! In high school that was a comment I’d consistently get from all my teachers on my writing! I think part of my problem is that I never actively pick a tense, I just start writing, and then switch the tenses as I see fit. It’s my writing and I can do as I please!
Such a fun tag! I identified with a lot of your answers, but oh how I wish I had the power to write as much as you do! I always find an excuse or a friend/family member needs me the second I sit down to write. 😂 Also, I LOVED what you said about your book being a product of your time and not to bother about putting references in that may date the story – I think it’s enjoyable to read a book that isn’t super brand new. ❤️
Google recommends a raw chicken. Lol. Google, are you okay?
And what are these names you speak of? I once had a character who went an entire rough draft without a name. If I don’t know what to call somebody, I’ll put an abbreviation of their role in parentheses, like antagonist name turns into (AN) for pages on end. My current novel is filled with various parentheses.
Great post, by the way! I may borrow some of the questions.
Ha ha this is great, thanks for sharing. Do not feel bad, it’s probably good for you not to drink coffee while writing. Using writing as an excuse is a great way to go write! I’m like, “oh I’ll be doing some writing. Yup, but thanks anyways”. Note to self, we definitely need to write today, like now! 30k a day? Nice that’s impressive, and so is finishing more novels than not. I wish I could say that but my doubt monster is a fearsome troll and she has beat me so many times, up until two years ago and my current WIP. Bout time I kicked her butt! Names are weird aren’t they? I don’t have a terrible time with names, I actually like having to find names. I really don’t like that I’ll keep leaning towards the same letter, or same three letters. I actively fight that. But I did just change the names of two brothers after at least a year of L names they’re not Ms. It was strange at first but now I’m used to it. I had to remember what they used to be just now. What I am nervous about is that I have a book title – I don’t think they’re necessary to have until the book is finished – that came to me when this was just going to be a short story. However these days I’m not so sure it fits anymore. Not a huge deal but I do find myself wondering if maybe it’ll work after all. Just let it go!
😀
Just put my answers up! Thanks for sharing this and providing this opportunity. 😀
This is a fun tag! It’s so funny because I have even done some of these stereotypical things and I am not even really a writer! I DO write down my dreams often, because they are generally better than anything my conscious mind comes up with? Like I absolutely would pursue those! Funny, but I actually LOVE character names! Also I genuinely cannot imagine writing a whole story by hand either. Just… how? Like I have been typing stories since I was 8 and got a 1990 Tandy computer for Christmas but can’t hand-write more than like 3 lines without getting annoyed.
Your posts always make me laugh, so thanks for that! Laughter is so necessary right now. Oh yes, I’ve certainly researched shady stuff. Murder/forensics related mostly. Names I tend to be good with. I let the character ‘introduce’ themselves to me.
I definitly researched how much blood can someone lose and a few things about the brain, depression and that kind of stuff. I would die if someone sees me during my research.
And my name problem is not about picking but remembering. I forget all the names, almost, except my main characters.
I love writing at night and thanks for not judging non-English speakers (always wondered why you use this “-“, but I like it).
And seriously: how the hell did you get to write 30K a day? I mean, a day has 24 hours. I just… I don’t get this kind of maths.
Oh gosh, I don’t have the writing prowess you do, Cait, but I will say names are my favorite part of a book. If writing was just naming people and titling things, I’m in. I’m all in. I’d basically be Margaret Atwood. I think that’s the only research I’ve ever really done for a book, too, is what names mean in different countries lol. I also did once Google murder-y/shady things, but it was just because I thought it would impress my friends that I knew how to clean up a crime scene without leaving anything behind. But now that I type that, I only worry about 16-year-old Ericka and why she thought that would impress people 😶