Nevernight was absolutely stabbtastic.
And “stabbtastic” is a word here which (A) does not exist, and (B) is a mixture of “stab” and “fantastic” so…STABBTASTIC. I know I know I’m genius.
I actually put off reading Nevernight for…um, ever. Just because the hype was so intense and I’m an Epic Fantasy Addict and have high expectations. IT DID MEET MY EXPECTATIONS!! (Because #stabstabstab.) But it also withered like a drowning avocado * in a few other respects. So obviously we are going to have a LIST REVIEW. *
* Admire my imagery.
** Is there any other kind of review on this blog? HA. I think not.
NOTE: There’s been discussion on whether it is or is not YA. The protagonist, Mia, is 16…but it is actually adult fantasy for the levels of violence and sex. Although, that saying, I’ve read fantasy that is a lot darker so I felt this was middle-ground-dark-adult-fantasy.
- IT’S AN ASSASSIN ORIGIN STORY. Which is, actually, my favourite. And Nevernight had ALL THE ASSASSIN THINGS. It’s brutal, bloody, stabby, and the characters go through some crazy circumstances that should’ve killed them except they’re all disagreeable and stay alive. (Although I lowkey thought the actual training routines of the assassins wasn’t as tough as it could be. What am I. A psycho maybe.) Plus it had a constantly interesting plot and creepified plot. #EPIC
- I REALLY LOVED MIA. She had the potential to be one of those “emotionless female warriors who has no opinion/emotion/personality” as seems popular in badass epic fantasy. BUT NO. MIA WAS AWESOME. She was a mixture of brutal cunning and brutal caring. Seriously, she really cared about things and would probably stab you in the face if you hurt her friends. She also can manipulate shadows and use them to attack people. She’s called a “darkin” and do we get to know the extent or reason for her powers???? HAHAHHAHAHAH NO LITTLE LAMB. We get to frown and ask questions. Where is mine sequel. Bring it thusly here.
“I’ve got tea,” Mercurio sighed. “And cake.”
The girl covered her growling belly with both palms.
“…What kind of cake?”
“The free kind.”
Mia pouted. Licked her lips and tasted blood.
- THE STORY IS WRITTEN WITH FOOTNOTES. Which were fully hilarious. It’s like a mysterious anonymous narrator is telling Mia’s story and giving footnotes commentary about (A) various pieces of world building that really developed the world, and (B) actual snide comments on Mia’s life decisions which are not good. BUT SARCASM.
- THE ROMANCE IS QUITE NICE. I mean, they’re assassins, so…I guess I shouldn’t use the word “nice” since they like beat each other up sometimes and snuggle other times. There’s a slow burn relationship between Mia and Tric. They’re both competing for top places in the Red Church Assassin School Thingie, but they also accidentally looooooove each other. #SHIPPINGIT I loved Tric! He was adorable and sweet BUT YET managed to be freaking badass and frightening at the same time. All the love for Tric.
“If I were going to name my blade,” Mia said thoughtfully, “I’d call it ‘Fluffy’.”
Tric snorted with laughter. “Fluffy?”
“‘Byss, yes,” the girl nodded. “Think of the terror you’d instil. Being bested by a foe wielding a sword called Souldrinker…that you could live with. Imagine the shame of having the piss smacked out of you by a blade called Fluffy.”
- THERE IS A TALKING CAT. There is literally no reason not to love a talking cat made out of shadows called Mister Kindly who gives sassy opinions and judges you 1000% of the time.
- IT WAS REALLY ADDICTIVE. I actually didn’t want to put it down?! And even though the hardcover copy weighed more than a Hobbit’s pantry and I nearly broke my wrists whilst reading…I STILL DIDN’T WANT TO PUT IT DOWN. (Although petition for someone to invent reading-robots to hold books open for we bookworms and turn the pages??? Because please.)
- IT WAS PREDICTABLE. Have I read too many books? Or just too many assassin stories?? WHO KNOWS. But I called a ton of the plot twists ahead of time. (Not the BIGGEST one at the end though.) I wanted shock. I got very small amount of shock.
- THE DEATHS WERE PREDICTABLE. This means my feels WERE NOT CRUMPLED because I was prepared for who would kick the bucket the whole time????
- THERE’S A BIZARRE TWIST AT THE END THAT MAKES NO SENSE. It was so out of character for Mia that I’m…angry?! And I shalt shout about it in spoilers again because I HAVE FEELINGS.
- THE PLOT ACTUALLY DIED IN FAVOUR OF SEXY TIMES. Like, sure, haha, let’s just pause ALL PLOT for a sex scene or two. (Sanity is throwing a tantrum in the background.) The problem was there was literally no plot happening about two-thirds through the book because all Mia was thinking about is sex. It was like Throne of Glass (my nemesis) ALL OVER AGAIN and I was bored and disappointed.
- THERE WAS A BIG EMPHASIS ON BEAUTY. I just hate this trope. I still see it a lot and I think it’s dangerous and poisonous. Like who defines “beautiful”??? GIVE ME A BREAK. Mia had to get a magical facelift and a boob job and I just…I’m so annoyed.
I’m definitely glad I read this!
It wasn’t perfect and I think the plot could’ve been tighter (so I didn’t feel like napping in a field of daisies in the middle there) and the deaths a leeeettle bit more unpredictable and we could’ve smashed the stupid ideals about “beauty”. But the writing was good and captivating! Mia was epic. Tric was adorable. THERE WAS SO MUCH SASS AND STAB. Which are my requirements for a good book.
So I shall be over here, wishing I had a talking shadow-not-cat to give me a running sass-commentary on my life and also petting the beauty that is my hardcover. And there are actually three beautiful maps in the UK hardcover. THREE!!! I LOVE MAPS JUST AS MUCH AS I LOVE CAKE AND THAT’S SAYING SOMETHING.
WOW I ACTUALLY BOUGHT THIS FOR MYSELF AND HAVE NO ONE TO THANK EXCEPT MY DRAGON COINS (AND WELL, THE AUTHOR TOO, I GUESS, FOR WRITING THIS NOVEL.)
Destined to destroy empires, Mia Covere is only ten years old when she is given her first lesson in death.
Six years later, the child raised in shadows takes her first steps towards keeping the promise she made on the day that she lost everything.
But the chance to strike against such powerful enemies will be fleeting, so if she is to have her revenge, Mia must become a weapon without equal. She must prove herself against the deadliest of friends and enemies, and survive the tutelage of murderers, liars and demons at the heart of a murder cult.
The Red Church is no Hogwarts, but Mia is no ordinary student.
The shadows love her. And they drink her fear.
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