life

“Enough is enough,” I said. “I need complete ADORATION. I need loyalty. I need to own a minion.”

So I have. I got. I did.

I have a puppy.

I HAVE A PUPPY. A REAL LIVE PUPPY THAT IS ALL (well mostly all, let’s not get into nitty gritty details) MY OWN.

I’ve wanted a dog for years. Forever. Ask anyone. If you want internet proof, ask Lydia, because we traced back our first conversations to being about her dog and my lack thereof. Ask my parents. I begged for a border collie, a kelpie, a dragon (they always rebuff my imaginative suggestions). Ask my sister, Mime. (Her response to I want a dog, “What’s the point of it? It smells.”) Okay…maybe don’t ask Mime. But just know that:

I really really really wanted a dog.

On our way back from our Sydney holiday, we picked up my fluffy baby Schnoodle. He’s 2 months old.

He’s half Shnauzter and half Poodle…so therefore a schnoodle.

I call him Atticus Bean.

“Atticus” from, obviously, To Kill a Mockingbird (which is a fabulous book and I am a literary person) and then “Bean” out of Ender’s Game, who is one of my favourite secondary characters. (I considered “Atticus Ender”, but “Atticus Bean” sounds better.)

In actuality, I call him “hey you” and “puppy” and “here boy” and “fluffy” and “trouble” and “sneaky” and “baby” and “spit that out”. I’m 100% sure he thinks his name is Spit That Out.

While we were considering purchasing my tiny minion, this happened:

Dad: You want a female dog, right?
Me: Um, I —
Mum: She wants a male of course. It’ll probably be the only boy she ever has in her life.
Me: …

Things Atticus Bean Does During His Day:

– Cries when I leave the room.
– Eats my socks, my shoes, my chair, the table leg, the mat, the carpet, Mum’s skirt, my hair, my toes, my fingers…and occasionally a toy.
– Screeches (trust me, he can screech) away when I put his lead on.
– Runs in terror from plastic bowls.
– Gets hiccups from listening to thunder.
– Learns how to growl and then does so at nothing in particular.
– Eats copious amounts of dog food.
– Sleeps on my bed. Never his.
– Chews a toy crocodile/dragon (we can’t even tell…it’s one of those undefined stuffed toys).
– Eats my paper from my Paper Sisters business.

I introduced my small human minions to my fluffy item.

I would like to say that Xave (4) and E.B. (2) are my minions…but I’m kind of lying. I am their slave. They are my Tiny Overlords. But they do have some habits that I taught them (like Xave shouts “Aw, gawsh” occasionally) and they are both on the path to geekdom.

Xave would like full possession of my puppy and E.B. is too rough. She may or may not have been bitten a little for pulling his tail.

But see their shirts?! Mime and I bought them Spiderman shirts for their birthdays and they absolutely love them. LITTLE GEEKS.

Atticus Bean is utterly cheeky.

And he bites me…like a lot. But I have the beginnings of an army here, peoples. Just so you know. He’s cute and fluffy and adorable now, but one day this little mite will be trotting at my heels as I subtly take over the world. (I proposed getting a Great Dane so I could ride him into battle, but my parents are, again, unimaginative and squashed that idea…along with getting a dragon).

Sure, I don’t get anything done anymore because distractions, but this is the cutest distraction that has ever uncoordinatedly fallen into my lap. I think I’m in love.

pets, pets! i want to hear your petly stories! do you have any minions of adoration in your lives? have you ever owned a puppy?

Cait is supposed to be posting about Sydney, but let’s face it: this is was the highlight of the excursion so you get to see it NOW. Sydney pictures later. She still hasn’t read anything because of Puppy Distraction but she doesn’t even mind. Currently Atticus is asleep on her leg and she can’t move.