For April I did a special magic trick called: falling off the face of the planet.
I’m super good at this one 🤗 I like to remember my YOUTH when I used to write 30,000-words in a day and read a whole book and answer 500+ blog comments weekly and post 2 x a day on instagram and basically…be a content machine. Right now? I just had a very warm hot chocolate and I would like a nap (it’s 8:30pm but you know what? Whatever). I got old. 😭 Possibly I wore myself out. But I’m trying not to berate myself for what I can’t do now, and just be softly proud of what I have achieved.
And this month I did edits! I mentioned in March that I signed with a new agent (!!!) and I dug in hard and deep to edits this month and I am so so fiercely happy with how my book is shaping up. But I sort of abandoned ship on everything else. What is MULTITASKING and BALANCE and can I buy some prepackaged and ready to bake.
Other Things That Went Down In April
- I celebrated The Boy Who Steals House 1st birthday 🥺So proud of this kid. I answered some Q&A questions from everyone!
- I baked a cheesecake for my sister’s birthday…or was it for me. Who can properly say.
- Atticus (my dog!) had another vet appointment, and while he’s doing so so well after nearly dying from organ failure and pancreatitis earlier this year…he’s still not better. I worry about him a lot. But he’s still back to being mischievous and full of attitude! He also gets jealous if I talk to my sister?! He’ll go rip up his toys?? 🤨 Let’s talk about your controlling relationship tendencies, Atticus.
- COVID-19 restrictions are slowly lessening in Australia. (Not that social isolation changed my life at all. That’s just…um, my every day.) But it’s freaking scary what’s happening to the world and how everyone is suffering. I hope you’re all doing okay, but truly…it’s a hard year. I hope no one is beating themselves up for not being super productive or for struggling.
- I’m barely buying books at the moment because prices have just soared. We’re talking $30 for a paperback on Book Depository?! I cannot.
- But in good news, it’s getting COLDER. I THRIVE in winter. As a massive insomniac, being able to burrow under a thousand blankets is such bliss. I may have two pieces of sleep soon.🤗
Like I said, I DID EDITS. I’m so exhausted. 😂 Writing is not extraordinarily fast for me anymore. I have to search for every word and polish it off before slipping it onto the page and hoping it fits next to the others. It’s hard. But it’s also so so rewarding and I’m remembering why I love writing. I so so love it and I feel like I’m getting back in the game. I wrote nearly every day (sometimes all day) and was just so proud of this story of messy kids and dark whimsical fairy tales. It has!!! my heart!!!
- I’m going to take May SLOW for writing. Maybe start working on another side-project. A little fantasy perhaps…👀
- Also I need to read?! I barely read in April!
- I want to read Save the Cat this month and start honing my craft.
- A pro of not writing so fast and hard anymore is I don’t break 3 keyboards a year!!!
I read exactly 9 books this month and this is…hilariously bad for me. But I was WRITING okay. And I struggle to switch gears. When my brain zones into Writer Mode™ I just want to keep working or melt into an amorphous shadow.
The hilarious part is me moaning about having no library access anymore last month and…since then I’ve read exactly one (1) library book. 😌 No need to drag me. I can do that myself.
(all covers link to goodreads)
BOOKS BOUGHT…
FOR REVIEW…
Vote and help meeeee!

Here are my reading highlights of April!
The Starless Sea // right, so let me introduce one of my NEW HEART FAVOURITES. I honestly struggle to fully capture how deeply I adored this book. It was slow and ponderous at times, but so whimsical and gorgeous, dark and often bizarre. Zachary was THE clueless loveable dumbass queer bookworm who was not quite sure what was happening at any given time. I relate. I love. This is such a love letter to storytelling. It stole my affections.
Burn // another Ness masterpiece of complete oddness. I really liked it, though it didn’t engulf me quite like some of his other books (my heart for A Monster Calls). It has dragons, is set in the 1950s, there’s a teen cultist assassin, and alternate realities and it’s just WEIRD. But good.
Red White & Royal Blue // a reread! It had been too long and I desperately wanted something super funny. I still love it so so much, and felt I actually kept up with the politics better. But I also felt the darkness of the story more? Especially at the end, with Alex’s anxiety. 🥺 I laugh and it broke me. Perfect book.
The Dark Tide // oh this was such a whimsical witchy tale, totally reminded me of the Ice Queen story where the girl goes off to rescue the stolen boy…but what if instead she falls in love with the queen? It’s gorgeously written. I did want a bit more depth to the world, but this is definitely a darkly pretty read.
Magic by Midnight // fractured fairy tales galore! This was just FUN and had so much humour too! About librarians controlling fairy tales. And it leaves you in an utter mess by the end so I really want the sequel!
Ninth House // Another reread! I tried it via audio this time and I felt like I kept up so much better. The language is really incredible at times, definitely academic and clever (maaaybe a little pretentious but I also love that about it). Gah I am in awe of Bardugo’s ability to weave such complex plots. Also the world is incredible, I adore it. I also forget like, um, everything…so it was practically like reading a whole new book. (A NESTING DOLL of villains omg.)
Other Books I read
did you spend April writing? tell me how you went! and what was your FAVE read of the month? do you balance reading vs writing well, or do you struggle to switch focuses too?
THAT CHEESECAKE LOOKED PERFECT. Also it seemed like you had a really productive month! Edits are tough. You go <3
YAY for you doing edits! Congrats!
(Also hiiiiii 😀 I’ve been lurking around your social media for ages hehe, you always reignite my reading ambitions! Oh and: tbwsh is just *heart eyes*)
I’ve honestly barely written anything fiction wise this year, I’ve been blogging and I did a lot of Journalism stuff whilst I was in Cape Town but nothing fiction. I’ve been struggling with motivation thanks to the whole lockdown thing and haven’t really been feeling in the mood to look at either of my WIPs. I want to try and get back into writing this month, but I don’t want to push it, so we’ll see how I’m feeling. My favourite read of this month was The City of Brass, it was just the escapist read that I needed at the moment. I do manage to balance reading and writing, though maybe it’s easier at the moment because they are literally all I can really do!
You’re amazing and all your accomplishments make my heart sing. <333
COVID-19 has been HARD for me (I live in the US and it's a total mess and people are getting sick everywhereeeee and my mom had to go get tested last week and even though she turned out NOT to have it she's still not feeling well, and … yeah.) So writing has been hard. But!! I'm querying!!! With my Maggie Stiefvater-esque fantasy cowboy novel!!! And I've gotten lots of encouraging responses from agents ("this isn't Just Right for me but it's very good, keep looking around), soooooooooooo that's been hopeful.
My favorite read of the month was "Monstrous Regiment" by Terry Pratchett and ALLLLLLLLL the characters turned out to be GIRLS DISGUISED AS BOYS, EVERY LAST ONE OF THEM, and it was hilarious and I was In Lurve.
Quite a good month for being ‘off the face of the Earth’… LOL… Happy writing!!
The cheesecake looks amazing! I hope your dog continues to improve 🙁 I meant to do Camp NaNo this month but didn’t finish… I fractured my finger and I’m using that as my excuse because typing is slow work, but let’s be real, I had already gotten out of the habit of writing daily even before that happened. XD
I’m so excited that you were able to edit so much this month! I am so excited about your next book. When will we be able to know expected release date?? And I read … four books last month? All of them were for school, so … if that makes you feel any better 😛
Glad you had a decent month, Cait! Sorry about edits though, I totally know how you feel. I’ve been rewriting (from scratch!) and holy cow is it hard!
congrats for all the great writing achievements in april!! i’m glad you’re remembering why you love writing — while my writing was definitely less lowkey than you, i also felt the same way! and aahh i really am due for a reread of rw&rb soon, though i’m hoping to hold out on it until i get really sad and need a pick-me-up haha. hope may is amazing for you!! <3
Oh my goodness, I didn’t know Atticus had been ill – I’m so sorry. I almost lost my Schnauzer to ketoacidosis, as we weren’t aware that she had diabetes. It’s so sad when our pets are ill!
I struggle to switch gears when writing too, actually with most things. I’ll focus intensely on one thing and then move onto something else. At the moment I’m reading so much, but I’ll probably find myself focusing on another hobby next month. Maybe piano or art! XD
I hope your May is good! Also, don’t worry if you don’t get all the things done – you’re doing amazing! <3
Personally, I think reading nine books whilst writing is pretty incredible. I really enjoyed Red, White, and Royal Blue when I read it earlier this year. I’m editing right now – it’s slow going. You used to break keyboards?!?!?!?
I’m glad your writing is going well. I hope you have a good May!
I am so sorry that Atticus is struggling, that has to be so hard, especially in times like this where like, Idk about there but you can’t really go to doctors and such anymore here. You can get a vet appointment (which it sounds like you did thank goodness!) but it’s drive-through. Like you legit toss your dog to them and then you have to like, retrieve the thing later. Bananas, friend.
And look- no one accomplishes anything these days so getting edits done is a HUGE deal, like I hung up some poster frames and a shelf and I am walking around like Rocky. And YES omg I feel your pain with Book Depository what ARE these prices?! There were a couple books I was waiting to buy til I got my tax return and such and well, looks like I am not doing that anytime soon, yikes.
I am so glad that you mostly liked The Dark Tide and Burn! I will be reading them, along with Little Creeping Things, in the next couple weeks. Also now I am dying for cheesecake and I shall blame you 😂
April has been…interesting, hasn’t it? Haha. But I’m SO SO SO happy that you’ve signed with a new agent!! That’s incredibly exciting and I’m crossing my fingers so hard that we’ll get to see this novel you’re editing. 😉 And I’m so sorry to hear about Atticus. Hopefully, things will start looking up for him; I can’t even imagine how stressful that must be for you/your family. But him being full of attitude sounds like a step in the right direction. Ooh, I read SAVE THE CAT! WRITES A NOVEL last month, and holy hell, it’s completely changed the way I’m thinking about writing. I wish I’d read it sooner, honestly! A lot of the things it mentioned I think for me was instinct (or things I’ve learned from examining other novels/media myself) but having it written down & explained it just immensely helpful. I think…it’s going to make me more of a plotter…even though I’ll always be a pantser at heart, haha.
It’s been sooo hard for me to concentrate on writing in April (and I’ve generally been feeling burnt out and down about writing this year, gah)…but I’m hoping for a more productive May. 🙂
Atticus!!! He’s so cute! I love him! I don’t understand why some animals DO NOT like it when we talk on the phone. My cat gets out of control whenever I jump on a conference call for work and I have to put her outside.
I love the cold, too, and am jealous that you’re just now getting into the cold weather season and ours, here in Arkansas, is just ending and starting to get hot and humid. I’m out on the back patio as I type this and it’s only 11am and I’m realizing I should be in shorts, not jeans.
Oh your cats must have the same moods as my Atticus 😂 why are they like this?! Adorable but chaotic 😂 And yeah ugh the humidity of summer is one thing I particularly dislike.
SAME for social isolation being every day (or what I wish was every day??) And for falling off the face of the planet. You are The Most Relatable, Cait, and an inspiration to us all.
It’s so good to hear you’re enjoying your writing again, even though it’s slower!! And know that there’s a bunch of us who are eager to get our grabby little hands on whatever you write. <3
why thank you, Jem, I try I try 😌😌😂 (okay but seriously social isolation is actually just me, thriving). I’m really crossing my fingers that I’ll sell another book someday soon!
Congrats again on the new agent and diving into edits! I’m doing massive rewrites on my WIP right now while I query my other project and, oh my, it is haaaard. It’s a third draft and I did a complete overhaul on my plot, so when I say “rewrites,” I literally mean rewriting the entire thing from scratch. Hardly anything has survived from the previous 100,00-word draft. I cry.
I’m sooo glad to hear Atticus is doing better! Every time I see posts from you I keep thinking “IS ATTICUS OKAY??” I’m glad he’s back to his mischievous self.
Oh I totally get that level of rewrites! It’s HARD. The book I landed a new agent for was on like it’s….8th full rewrite?! It wouldn’t even be recognisable from the first draft 😂 ah the things we do to get our books just write. But I hope yours behaves and comes out just how you want!!
(omg thanks for caring about Atticus. I’m SO glad he’s doing better now.)
Oh my goodness, Cait!!! I am SO proud of you for all that you’ve accomplished this month!!! You may not think it’s that much, but DUDE. YOU ARE KILLING IT. Seriously. You read nine books AND edited your novel AND made cheesecake. I mean those first two things are pretty cool but THAT LAST ONE. Clearly you are winning at life and deserve a reward. (might I suggest more cheesecake?)
In all seriousness, though, you’re doing fantastic!!! And I hope Atticus starts feeling better soon… <333 That smol little gremlin is one of my favorite things to find in my Instagram feeds! <33
(also also also!!! CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR NEW AGENT!!! Oh my word, that must be so exciting!!!!!!)
Kenzieeee 💛 You are always too lovely . And I DO agree, there is always a reason for more cheesecake. I mean, we can never have too much right?! (And Atticus is now coming off the last of his meds so I am SO happy!!)
I have not read your blog in so long, but it feels nice to read again even tho so much has changed. I used to be waiting for you to post, this was more when I was a junior/senior in high school. Now I’m finishing my second year of college, majoring in literature and publishing. This blog post made me feel more assured in my life directions. I truly want to be in the depths of books forever. But I just finished school, and can’t leave the house to see friends so I’m definitely reading more. I’ve made it a summer goal to catch up on the few Cassandra Clare books I’ve let slip past me. And I’m currently finishing up Again, But Better by Christine Riccio. Also feeling pretty content just doing some spring cleaning and listening to podcasts, and working remotely of course. I’m quite happy to return to reading this blog, it made me feel comforted. Thanks
Aww hi, Leah!! I confess I haven’t been blogging as much as I used to either. But hey I’m so glad life is taking you in directions you want to go (and congrats on being in your second year of uni!!) and thank you for still reading my blog after all these years💛💛💛💛
I started coming back to a book of a sweet YA contemporary series I’ve been writing for years and finally editing it. I had been avoiding it and then I just sat down and started editing it and I’ve been scrapping and rewriting everything I’ve written for this manuscript. Crazier things have happened? But since editing it, I’ve been LOVING the re-edits and everything I’ve been writing for it which also means since it’s part of a companion series, I need to make sure the easter eggs that I placed just RIGHT.
Ahh that sounds so exciting though! I kind of like rediscovering old manuscripts too!!
Sounds like you had a productive April! Due to health issues and pregnancy, I did not get any reading or writing done in April like I had planned. But I just recently finished a book so I’m hopeful May will be different!
Aw that’s totally understandable!! Not all seasons are good for reading/writing anyway. Hope you and baby are doing well though!!
That’s very true! We’re doing well, I just have every symptom known to man. Haha.
Congrats on the edits! I’ve been mainly writing blog posts recently because I started my blog over again from scratch and I’ve had so much more fun writing posts. I still need to work on my networking though 😂 And I hope Atticus gets better, it’s always tough when pets get really sick.
Aw yay for more blogging!! I’ll come over and refollow your new blog 😍
All of this is… a mood. I barely read in April because I couldn’t focus that well and needed something *properly* happy so… I played Animal Crossing and did nothing else. And then uni started again and threw me into having to study all by myself for things I’m not… that good at. It’s challenging. But I started reading The Raven Boys again because I need this right now and oh what a good idea. It’s incredible how a favourite book can make everything a bit better, isn’t it?
Hope you’re doing okay!
I’m so so for rereads when times are tough. It just helps to read something you know you’ll like, but you also know what’ll happen?! Ahhh but May treats you better, and good luck for uni things!
i read so much i march to combat my anxiety,, but then in april i just,, didn’t read? i started about four different books and didn’t finish them and only finished three, and they were all rereads. keeping up with work and still having motivation to do anything is hard i guess.
I think it’s totally acceptable to just need rereads sometimes! Focus can be hard when the world is falling apart.
Ah I’m really proud of you for getting your new agent and getting into edits, yay! It’s such a complicated part of the process, but you’re doing amazing and I believe in your and all of your projects SO much. You’re an incredible writer, always rooting for you! <3
Ahhh you make me want to re-read RW&RB, it's such a fun, endearing and heartwarming book, I need it again ahah 🙂
I hope May will be kind to you, take care, Cait! <3
I love how reading a lot or a little is so subjective! When I was in high school I had months where I read 40 books, but in April I read 8 books and that was really good for me, especially when I take into account that so far in May I’ve only read 2 books. And one was a re-read! But like you said, I’m trying not to beat myself up about what I previously was able to do. I’m doing my best at the moment, and so whatever I manage to read is fine. Plus, I’ve been super busy studying for and taking finals, so it’s been really difficult to find time to read! Hopefully once the semester ends and I’m on vacation I’ll have the time and freedom to read more!
I really want to read The Starless Sea! I’ve heard such fantastic things and I love whimsical and ponderous stories! I think that a weirdly specific kind of favorite of mine! Maybe I’ll buy myself a copy as a post-finals treat!