Once upon a time, I vanished into the dark depths of February and wrote a book.
No. That’s a lie. I wrote two books. YES, FIENDS OF THE GALAXIES, I WROTE TWO BOOKS BACK-TO-BACK AND HOW AM I STILL BREATHING. I DON’T KNOW. I feel like February absolutely ate me, because I was lost in the dark depths of my mind * for 11 days straight. 8 of those days I spent writing, 1 = I spent puking because darn you family and your inability to keep sickness to yourself, and 2 = I took completely off so I could lay facedown on the carpet and miss my word-children so much I spontaneously decided to write the sequel.
Did February eat me or did I eat February? We’ll never know.
But I feel entirely out of the loop with blogging and reading! What’s going on? Who has done what? What has been read? Is the moon still shining? Have the trees waged war against the thousands of deaths of their brothers whom we call paperbacks and keep covertly in bookshelves? ** Has anyone grown an extra head? Hit some milestone? Missed me? Learned to play Beethoven’s 3rd? Turned into a grape???????
I just don’t know.
But I am back. FOR NOW. Because, quite frankly, I had the best time of my life writing these two books and it’s come to my attention I will need to slip away more this year to write. But then it will all need editing and who’s going to do that???
Because I may write fast, but folks, these books are messes. Beautiful messes though. I’m a proud parent of even my most dysfunctional and ugly children.
So! I asked twitter what it would like to see upon my return.
I’M SIMULTANEOUSLY PROUD AND TERRIFIED THAT YOU WANTED SNIPPETS. I get seriously nervous talking about my writing. Like I want to share all the things with you, but is it too much??? Is it confusing??? Am I gabbing on too much??? Am I even funny when I think I’m funny??? ARE THE PLANETS ACTUALLY IN THE SKY OR IS IT ALL JUST A GRAND ILLUSION???
#WritersLifeCrisisIntensifies
But instead of stuffing myself in an envelope and mailing myself to Jupiter (but is it even there, mate, or do the skies lie), I’m going to do a snippets post! I’ll also keep up the tradition and do a Q&A with myself on questions you never asked and probably didn’t want to know but HEY. WHAT HAVE WE GOT TO LOSE. ***
* Short horror story right there.
** Second horror story because omg if trees reclaim their murdered brothers WHAT WILL I TAKE PHOTOS OF FOR MY #BOOKSTAGRAM??? Am I ready for war with the trees?? I’m too young for this.
*** Like, maybe….MY MIND???? I mean I lost that years ago. But holy flipping pancakes, I’M AN UNCONFIDENT BEAN.
“SO, CAIT, WHY DID YOU WRITE 2 BOOKS AT ONCE? YOU SAID YOU WERE WRITING 1? WHY’D YOU LIE TO US, HUH?”
As a nefarious evil queen, I have to do evil now and then to uphold my name. It’s just how it is. Here is a cupcake. Try to deal.
Also my secondary answer is the small fact that book one ended on a horrible cliffhanger. The last word of the book was “SCREAMING” and I was screaming too! I needed to find out! My book was in pain and I needed to fix it! (By adding…in…more …pain???Okay I don’t even know.) I had an outline ready! NOTHING WAS THERE TO STOP ME, NOT EVEN COMMON SENSE, SO I WENT FOR IT.
FYI the last word of the second book is “DANCING” so I think we can all safely assume it’s best to skip book one and go to book 2 because #happier. *
* Or else it’s like a dance of pain and evil and I’m lying again about the supposed “happiness”. So. There’s that too…
“DID YOU BREAK ANY PERSONAL RECORDS THAT WE SHOULD ALL BE WORRIED ABOUT?”
FUNNY YOU SHOULD ASK BECAUSE YES. I wrote 200,000 words in 8 days. (That’s two books by the way, haha, don’t freak out.) Boom. For my next trick, I’ll write all that in an afternoon and then retire to the Bahamas and live in a hammock for the rest of my born days.
“CAN I HATE YOU?”
No, you’ll hurt my feelings and they’re very precious feelings because I only have TWO OF THEM. The rest of me is an uncaring seashell. #TeamProtectCaitsFeelingsTheyreAnEndangeredSpecies
“WHAT DID YOU EVEN WRITE ABOUT AGAIN? I GUESS STABBING, BUT WAS THERE ANY OTHER PLOT?”
You guess stabbing? Aww! It’s like you KNOW ME * and I’m so pleased. But what is it about? Let’s see…
I wrote a post and had you vote for my project ** so go over yonder and see details there! Or I’ll give you a quick list update now:
- it’s about stabbing (no one is surprised)
- and a haunted opera house that’s personified and has feelings and opinions and they are “kill all the things”
- it needs counselling
- it’s about a dancer boy whom is THE BEST and so the opera house wants HIM DEAD
- there is a timid cute ghost smol son
- everyone gets sassed half to death and back again
- cute cats
- set in an alternate-reality-fantasy-inspired-magician-ruled Paris
- not everyone dies at the end because a lot of them die at the beginning because #ghosts
- I’m so smart
* Oh wait. I’m writing the questions out. Darn.
** This book like…came…3rd on the poll????? SO WHAT WAS THE POINT OF HAVING YOU VOTE? I DON’T KNOW. My evil queenness strikes yet again. I’ve become a monster and am ignoring the people.
“HOW MUCH TIME DO YOU SPEND WRITING ANYWAY, YOU ODD GRAPEFRUIT?”
Stop name calling. What is this. Who is writing this.
Also I actually decided to track how long it took me to write! Inspired by hearing Marissa Meyer track all the hours she put into writing Heartless. SO I THOUGHT I’D DO THAT TOO.
I made colourful writing logs.
It amused me greatly.
I love charts and spreadsheets and stats. I’m addicted. It’s a worry and I don’t even care.
I regularly spent at least 8 hours writing and hit 30K most days.
Also 30K in a day is a new best for me. #yas
My hands hate me. I overhyped myself the whole time and couldn’t sleep barely at all. And I think I existed mostly on brownie.
2/10 would not recommend being me if you can help it.
Also ANY TIME I got to an emotion scene I slooooooowed down so badly. Any time I was writing like a fiend was when someone was getting thrown off a roof or set on fire. I’m a nice person in real life I actually promise.
PS. I always say this but…not everyone can take 4 days off to just write ALL DAY. Obviously. I’m very lucky! This post doesn’t exist for me to be bragging so hopefully it never comes across that way! I just want to share my liiiiiife with you, frens.
“ANY FUN FACTS WE SHOULD KNOW ABOUT THESE TWO BOOKS?”
Absolutely YES. Any reason to write a list, let’s be honest here.
- I named my character Toulouse after the kitten in Aristocats. So I gave him a pet cat who became absolutely VITAL to the storyline and literally stole the show 90% of the time. Oh it’s fine, dear outline, I WASN’T COUNTING ON YOU AT ALL.
- I didn’t get writers block. At, um, all. Wow. Must be the cake.
- I forgot to name most of my characters. And was then scrambling for French names on the internet and crying. WRITER PRO HERE.
- I’m actually HOPELESSLY IN LOVE with these two books. They were so easy and fun and exciting and heartbreaking to write. I had feels. I have feels. I’m struggling to let them go.
- Oh and I’ve officially written 25 books now. I have no life. Just endless parties in my head.
- Oh and they’re not…YA…as…intended?!? Like DARN YOU, NOVELS. I’m so mad. But they turned out super super dark and feels very much like adult fantasy instead. So. Bury me.
- They are full of the most terrible horrible puns in the world. I didn’t put this in the outline either. WHY EVEN DID I WRITE AN OUTLINE, HUH. My pun game is so strong, though. Everyone in this book either dies from (A) the opera house walls murdering them, or (B) using one too many bad puns and having the rest of the cast strangle them.
- There is so SO much dancing. It makes me happy. This should be a movie. Let’s skip the editing and go straight to there and make me a millionaire.
I’m so nervous, HOLD ME, FRANK. But here are a jumble of words that happened in both books. I’m proud of them but they’re messy and I honestly miss this book already. BRING ON THE EDITS! Except hahah no. Maybe in 2 years time.
PUN ME, SON:

THAT TIME IT GOT A LITTLE BIT META:
CAN’T STOP THAT PUN FEELING OHHH OOOH:
PARENTING IS A+ IN THIS NOVEL:
#SQUADGOALS
HE NEEDS TO STOP, LET’S BE REAL HERE:
THERE’S FOOD BECAUSE OF COURSE:
THE GHOST IS ALSO A KLEPTOMANIAC
THE PUNS FIND THEIR END, AT LAST OMG:
EVERYONE WANTS TO BE ALLITERATED
Now to let it moulder pleasantly while I nap.
Just kidding. I don’t sleep.
But I will be writing another book again soon! Probably April for Camp NaNo because 2017 is the year of WRITING ALL THE THINGS APPARENTLY!!! I just have so many stories. And I have to tell them or I’ll combust. So bear with me! And don’t panic about the blog because eeeeverything will be going back to normal here!
If it ever was normal.
What’s normal.
Help.
I’m still stuck with trying to write or outline or just think about stories. And I almost always end up not doing anything productive, so I’m kind of jealous of your productive “writing weeks”! And I want to read some of your books! CAIT WE NEED THEM. (I also need to write but who has time for that when you can read more books???)
Finding time to read AND write is actually the hardest, right?!? I read ONE BOOK in the last two weeks. I feel terrible. 😭😭😜😜
Now I feel a bit better, AT LEAST you are a bit human! If you wrote 2 books and read like 10 more, then I’d be really worried though. So don’t do that Cait, I need my heart!!
I promise I won’t!! 😂 There’s not THAT many hours in the day right?!?
Well, I’m not so sure about that. If you end up writing an ENTIRE BOOK in a single afternoon, then you’d have a lot of time to read, right? lol
OMG this was fantastic Cait! The snippets were amazing- my favourite was definitely the last one. ALTHOUGH I AM STILL CRYING BECAUSE I WANT TO READ YOUR BOOKS!!! WHEN ASHJFGHKJHK??? Plus now, I don’t believe it. You are not a human. You are a dragon aren’t you? Why did you hide this from us?
I AM A DRAGON. IT’S TRUE. THERE’S NO DENYING IT ANYMORE. Also *squishes you* Thankyou!!
I NEED THIS. Or these? WHICHEVER ONE, I WANT THESE CHARACTERS IN MY LIFE. I’m smiling so much right now, and am in simultaneous awe of your speedy writing skills, and ability to come up with so many dead puns. 😀
‘Everyone wants to be alliterated’ is my favourite, though it’s so hard to choose! Thank you for sharing your brilliant snippets! 🙂 <3
AWW THANK YOU. I’M SMILING SO MUCH RIGHT NOW.😂 *gives you cake* And omg coming up with horrific puns is actually my life’s work. I even paused writing to go for a walk with my dog and he was jumping around so I said “he moves with paw-pose…like purpose”. And my mum just rolled her eyes.
I’M SO GOOD AT THIS.
I love these snippets! Especially the last one and all the puns 🙂
But, 200K in 8 days? HOW DO YOU WRITE SO MUCH?
I really want to read these books, now!
I JUST USE BOTH HANDS, SEE. THAT’S THE TRICK.
(Also *squishes you* thank you!!)
These books sound so good. Please be kind and publish soon. Also #jealous you are like a writing machine except not so machiney!
YOU’RE SO KIND. And I’m working on it!😂
And then there’s me, trying to write just one in however many years I’ve been alive. I’m not jealous. I’m not. *cries in a corner*
*feeds your project cake to help it grow faster*
This is really adding to my Cait-is-a-robot theory. I mean, two novels in less than a month?? *Picks jaw up off the floor* Add that to the whole world domination thing, and you can see why I’m suspicious, right?
SNIPPETS! YAY! Also, BAD PUNS! YAY! Bad puns are life. My current story has at least two characters with bad puns for names. 🙂 I HAVE A FAVOURITE SNIPPET!! THE ONE ABOUT THE PASTRY! Because I too relate to going out with someone who can’t eat something, and nobly sacrificing myself to safe them from it.
Of course you can exist on cake alone. How do you think I, a non-coffee drinking person, am surviving uni? Sugar. Lots and lots of sugar. 😉
*nods sagely* I see why it is suspicious, although just add in “cait has no life and doesn’t sleep tbh” into your theory calculations. Being fuelled on cake helps too???? I’m sure robots can’t appreciate cake like I can. 😇 BAD PUNS FOR THE WIN THOUGH. There is nothing better than delivering a pun so bad everyone in the room hates you. 😂 I’m so glad you have pun names in your book too. *hi fives*
Your snippets got me laughing!! I’m really looking forward to reading the whole books!! 😉
OH PHEW THAT’S A RELIEF. 😂 I always get slightly nervous that I only find myself amusing with my weird humour.😂😂 THANKS FOR READING!! <3
Haha I know that feeling 😂
Have you ever sent a manuscript to a publishing house?
I actually have an agent in the UK! 🎉
That is amazing!! 😍
WHEN WILL WE BE ABLE TO READ THIS MARVELLOUS WORK? WHEN? *Wails*
I LOVE Toulouse (and Gavriel.. a bit) and THE PUNS OMG!!!!!
Favourite? UGH THAT IS SO HARD BUT THIS ONE MADE ME LAUGH SO MUCH (THE PUNS FIND THEIR END, AT LAST OMG:)
THESE SNIPPETS WILL NEVER BE ENOUGH – I NEED BOOK! AND CAIT you can’t die of nerves, I NEED SOMEONE TO KEEP FEEDING MY TBR!
Exist on Cake? YOU ARE Cake@PaperFury (Also a dragon, and you might just be a bookshelf but WHO AM I?) Oh wait, I’m a GOLDFISH because I cannot remember ANYTHING!!! But I might as well be cake to0 because I know you like me that much…XD
I DON’T KNOW WHY.😂 WE CAN LIVE IN HOPE.😂 And omg I love these two smol idiots so much too. Although if I decided to make it officially adult they won’t be so smol anymore but whateveeeeeer. I LOVE THEM. <3
I basically should change my name to CAKE. Let's be real here.
You write 30K in 8 hours and I can’t even get to 30K in 8 weeks.
<__>
Seriously though, that is AMAZING. And I think my problem is also the antidepressants. BUT I WISH I HAD YOUR MANIC WRITING SKILLS. (Also I found your puns to be ghostly. GET IT. GHOSTLY. GHASTLY.)
I’m obsessed tbh, Inge. And I have very inspiring cake. I’M SURE THAT’S THE REASON. *tackle hugs you* Also Toulouse would be in entire appreciation over your pun skills. :’)
Like I said on Twitter Cait, I think i love Gavriel. Any chance you could write me into a book 3 with him? 😛 I could be a ghost 😛 I love the last snippet 😀 Actually I love them all and wish you would publish your books so I could buy them and tell people about them and feature them on Bookstagram and basically just crown you queen (Since you are one already, I’ll just re-crown you?) AMAZING AS ALWAYS CAIT!!!
Also Cait, I just recently read Blue Lily, Lily Blue and loved it and had to tell you ’cause who better to fangirl about Raven Cycle with than you!! 😀 <3
*tumbles out of the darkness and starts shrieking* YAAAAS FOR ANYTHING THE RAVEN CYCLE FLAVOURED OMG I’M SO HAPPPPPPY YOU LOVED IT!! And isn’t that cliffhanger just a little bit cruel though, right??! I hope you’re reading The Raven King soon. TIME TO FREAK OUT OVER OUR POOR PRECIOUS CHILD GASNEY.
Hahhhha, omg but THANK YOU for liking the snippets!! I’d say SURE to book 3 except there’s honestly no one left alive to get through it. Well…maaaybe there’s a few people alive.😂*cackles mysteriously into the darkness*
Oh it was cruel!! I believe the book made me laugh and cry and thinking about Blue and Gansey made me want to step into the book, gather them and give them bear hugs!!
GANSEY IS A PRECIOUS LITTLE ANXIOUS CUPCAKE AND NEEDS TO BE PROTECTED AT ALL COSTS. <3 <3 And also Jesse?!? I love Jesse. Especially how he spoke in like allcaps. I can relate.😂
Hi Cait.
Congratulations on this massive achievment! I am happy that you chose to write your ‘Phantom of the Opera’ story. That is the one I voted for last month.
Eat some cake, you stabby dragon, you deserve it!
~Icky. 🙂
YAY!! Obviously I wrote it just for you then. 😉
And omg thank you!! YOU ARE KIND.
you amaze me cait. I’ve never finished a book. O_O I kinda wanna read it……but it will probably scare me….hmmm…….
oh, I TOTALLY understand the family getting you sick part. My little teeny weeny sister got sick, puked one night, the next afternoon, and then went to sleep early that night and slept THE WHOLE NEXT DAY. Then she was better, and running around like a maniac. Then my teeny tiny brother got sick, slept a whole day, and I don’t know if he ever threw up. Then I got sick yesterday, and vomited FOUR times last night. FOUR. and I couldn’t sleep, because of the cat, my thirst, and I couldn’t get up because my legs felt like noodles, I sniffed my gatorade to keep from going crazy, and when my dad got up i begged for some ice to suck on. so I’m still on the couch, sucking ice, and crawling to the bathroom will be the most I do today. Oh, and plot to become the next dragon queen. because I just re-read the Eragon series and I’m feeling inspired. 😛
very sickly, ~Olive
UGH I’M SO SORRY FOR YOU, OLIVE. *cries because knows exactly how you feel* My small nieces and nephews all had the vomit bug last week, but I thought I was in the clear??? Because A WEEK, right!? But apparently not. And I wrote like a fiend on Saturday and then was dEAD all of Sunday. It was so depressing. I hope you feel totally better really soon. <3
A week in between is one of the worst. 🤦♀️ Luckily, I’m feeling a bit better today. Which is good, since I have to sing in choir today. 😃 Aaaaaand, I’m still plotting to be the dragon queen! 😁 👸🏼🐉🐲
Most crazily, ~Olive
ahhhh i loved those snippets so much and your book sounds amazing!! NEED THIS STAT. a french fantasy world sounds so awesome! lol the puns are epic and i love gavriel already. congrats on this achievement!
You’re so kind! THANK YOU. <3
OMG 200,000 words in 8 days?? That is so cool! Go you!
I LOVE ALL OF YOUR PUNS. THOSE ARE QUALITY PUNS.
THANK YOU, VIVIAN, YOU KIND SOUL. <3
Omg Cait every single snippet is amazing and I want to read it all!!! Forget editing, just publish it now so I can buy it 😄😄😄 Lyndsey x
Bahahha, THIS MADE MY DAY!😂 Although I promise you it is 99% MESS and 1% snippets I can salvage that aren’t too hopeless.😂
Oh Cait!! You make it seem so simple. Like saying “I ate two donuts”=”I wrote two books”. I am glad you put up the colorful time schedule. That was fun to see. Keep going. Write more and create a world record (Not that you are any less of a record breaker right now).
Ahhh thank you *hugs* 😂 I really liked keeping the schedule so that’s something I’m going to do for all my writing from now on! And yeah, writing two books is basically like eating two donuts, right????😂
200,000 words in 8 days!? That’s an insane amount of writing! Congrats! 🙂
And I loved the snippets (and especially the ghost related puns!)! ‘I’m listening and unhappy with your parenting’ just made me actually giggle in the living room, and now my family are looking at me like I’m quite mad because I’m just sniggering to myself in the corner 🙂
Ahhh thank you!! 😂 It was definitely an insane thing, but also really rewarding and fun so I’m glad I did it even though I was worried I’d totally bomb out due to tiredness. BUT I DIDN’T SO HUZZAH.
omgggg it made you ACTUAL LAUGH?!? I’M SO RELIEVED. 😂 I get worried that my psychotic humour might only be funny to me honestly.😂
I love the snippets muchly; your story sounds utterly fabulous. Also, I continue to be in awe of your writing speed, so much so that the only way I can express myself is to quote Aaron Burr (musical version, not historical version): “How do you write like you’re running out of time? How do you write like you need it to survive? HOW DO YOU WRITE EVERY SECOND YOU’RE ALIVE, EVERY SECOND YOU’RE ALIVE?” I mean, seriously. 30K. In one day. Multiple days. For me, a really amazingly good day is getting 5K, and I’m dead after that. Basically, you’re amazing and I’m in awe.
Also, all the puns remind me of a friend of mine, for whom puns are basically a second language. He’s kind of awesome. He’s also going to be president someday, or he will if I have anything to do with it. So, yeah. I appreciate that.
Have fun recuperating from your novel!
AWW, THANKS, SARAH!! I know that’s from Hamilton, right?😂 I don’t even know how I write so fast. I haven’t done this much so fast before!! Last September I thought I was dead doing 130K in 6 days…but…apparently I’ve got more to give.😂 (I know a girl who does 50K in a day though! So that’s goals!)
I’m in entire approval of your friend. PUN FRIENDS FOR PRESIDENT.
You’re welcome! Yup, from Hamilton. Which is awesome and you should listen to it, just sayin’. (Although . . . I guess it might have limited appeal outside the US, ’cause it’s about US history? And I have no idea how Aussies feel about the US? But you should listen anyway, IMO. If you want. I won’t tell you what to do.) And ok then. I’m slightly terrified to see what happens next . . . but also super excited, so. 😀
I did try to listen to Hamilton once! Like…I just wasn’t really getting it.😂 I think it’s more because it’s rapping and Idk I’ve never been into rapping? I spent like 90% of my homeschool life doing American history haha, because our curriculums were always American, so I know a loooot about USA history weirdly enough!!😂
Cait!! You’re so amazing haha. I’ve struggled to write ONE book in the last 9 months and only at 140k words! Omg, not everyone can be as amazing as you haha. But I’m working on my second story and you are a dear inspiration to me <3 Congrats!! And PS your puns are to die for.
OMG 140K IS HUGE!!! WELL DONE!! The biggest book I’ve ever written is 130K but hopefully I’ll whittle that down in edits.😂
Awww, this makes me flail!! YOU’RE TOO NICE TO ME. <3
Just how? I’ve tried finishing my wip for a long time now and it’s just not working. I haven’t touched it since November and it’s about 40,000 words. I want for it to work so bad, that i’ve given up.
Thank you for the post though.
Aww, I understand that feel of wanting to give up. *sends you cake and hugs* I nearly quit writing once because I’d been working on a book for a YEAR and nothing worked. And honestly…switching to a different project sometimes really helps!! Some books just aren’t read, right? You don’t have to give up on it forever, just maybe let it rest for a bit?
I SAW THIS POST IN MY INBOX AND I SERIOUSLY SQUEALED FOR JOY AND THE PAGE COULDN’T LOAD FAST ENOUGH!!!!!!!!
And then I saw the title, and- oops. Might want to step aside for that wierdly familiar hurricane that is me, and is also SO TOTALLY FREAKIN OUT BECAUSE I AM ABOUT TO READ SNIPPETS????? FROM THE PAPER FURY HERSELF?!?!?!?!!??!????????? WHAT THE GUM?????
(Oh! Fabulous side note, I started and finished watching The Series of Unfortunate Events!!!!! IT WAS SO FANTASTIC I LAUGHED SO HARD AT COUNT OLAF!!!!! AND ALL THE SNEAKY LINES THEY PUT IN ABOUT THE SUGAR BOWL AND PEOPLE AND PLACES AND WRONG QUESTIONS….
AFAGGAHDHDYGSGAHJKDHSUBFUNSIAMNSYSHGYABATEUEOJWBCBNDHSIKSMHSBS!!!!!¡!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU KNOW?!)
OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH.
(Another side note, I am going to do a Q and A vlog pretty soon, so if you have any questions for me, you can comment on my blog! Not thatyou HAVE to, of course, but.. I might just… *sniff* cry…. 😊)
Also thought I could mention, that while your writing is obviously vastly superior to my own, and I probably won’t find a single thing wrong with it, I can ALWAYS try my hand at editing??????? Anything to ease your Majesties burden!!!!!! At this point, however, I will not do my usual and BEG you to let me beta read (I’m still open) but will refrain, since I am probably getting annoying at this point. (And I will be open to beta reading your books for the rest of time) Am I getting annoying???
WOW! THAT WORD COUNT IS SO FABULOUS, I’M JUST KIND OF GAPING OVER HERE. WHAT EVEN SERIOUSLY I NEED TO MOVE TO AUSTRALIA AND BECOME YOUR APPRENTICE. I WILL PAY RENT IN BOOKS AAAND CAKE ALSO SOME MONEY IF YOU WANT??????????????????????????????????????? I WILL LIVE OUTSIDE IN A CARDBOARD BOX AND WILL MAKE YOU FOOD WHILE YOU WORK AND KEEP YOUR FAMILY FROM GIVING YOU SICKNESS (FAMILIES JUST LOVE TO SHARE DON’T THEY? OH WAIT NO THEY ONLY SHARE THE SICKIES. THANKS A LOT FAM!!!!) AND ALSO I WILL BE AN ERRAND GIRL SO WHEN YOU NEED MORE BOOKS OR TEA OR CAKE OR CHOCOLATE OR PENS OR BATTERIES OR CHARGERS OR CAMERAS OR….. WHATEVER ELSE IT IS THAT YOU NEED, I WILL DO IT FOR YOU, AND I WON’T ASK FOR ANY PAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
JUST CAN I BE YOUR APPRENTICE??
I AM A MEMBER OF THAT TEAM. WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT TO HATE YOU WHEN YOU’RE THE QUEEN AND YOU’RE SO FABULOUS???????? I DON’T GET THIS. LET ME SHOOT WHOEVER WANTS TO HATE YOU. YEAH?
Yikes. Remember what I said about wanting to be your apprentice?? Well… Ahem… The thing is… I STILL WANT TO EXCEPT EVEN MORE BADLY NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE? PLEASE?????????????????????
AND ON MY GOSH. OHMGOSH. OHMYGOSHOHMYGOSHOH MY FREAKING OUT GOSH AND WHAT THE EVEN HECK????¿????????????????!?!??!??!???????!?!!!?!????!!!!!!??!!!!?!?!?!!??!??!?!?!!???!?!??!?!?!??!?!??!?!!??????????!???????
THOSE SNIPPENTS WERE ABSOLUTELY FANTABULOUS I CANNOT EVEN DO ANYHING OR SPEELLL WRITE OR EVEN WHAT THE HECK IF IT WEREN’T FOR AUTOCORRE CT I AM NOR SURE IF THIS WORJLD EVN BE LEGIBBLE. WHAT THE HEAVK EVEN WENT ON????????? PURE AWESOMENESS THAT WHAT THE HECK.
HOW IN MARS DO YOU DO IT???????? I NEED TO BE YOUR APPRENTICE. REALLY I DO.
OKAH. OKAY OKAYO KAY. MY FAVOURITE ONE WAS………. UM…… WAIT A SEC IM TRYING TO DECIDE…….. STOP PRESSURING ME!…………………NKAY……. UM………….DONT WORRY JUST HYPERVENTILATING OVER HERE…. NOTHING WROG AT ALL…….
NOOOOOO!!!!! I CWNT DECIDE AND YOU CANT MAKE ME AND I LOVE THEM ALL I NEED THESE BOOOKS IN MY HANDS WRITE NOW BEFORE I DIIIIIIEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i am so dead.
Okay most important thing first: YAS THAT YOU LOVED THE SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS SHOW!! SQUEEEEEE. WASN’T IT PERFECTION!?? I think I died about the line about the sugar bowl. I mean omg can they be any more perfect?!??!?? There were so many references to things to come and it basically renewed my faith in movie adaptions.😍😍😍 BLESS THAT SHOW.
Ahem. Ok. I am cool now. *lies because is still flailing over ASOUE*
Anyway I’m so glad you liked the snippets!!! 😱😂😂😂 You’re so encouraging omg it makes my day. I’m just laughing here because omg you leave the best comments.😂
…
Cait.
CAIT.
You wrote 2 novels… 200,000 words… in like… barely over a week?? O_O WHAT EVEN YOU MAGICAL BEAN. Next thing we know you’ll be growing into a beanstalk all the way to Jupiter and writing books there and then raining them down on earth because you have so many. Just. I AM FLABBERGASTED YOU ARE AMAAAAZING!!!!
Also. Wait. You wrote 8K in 2.5 hours??? O___________O I wrote 8K in a day once… it was the last day of my first NaNo and it took me 12 hours to write that and I only survived due to chocolate and family members pushing me back to the computer. I…I…I… how even. (I normally get 1K to mayyybe 1.5K in an hour.) You must type inordinately fast. O_O
“CAN I HATE YOU?”
No, you’ll hurt my feelings and they’re very precious feelings because I only have TWO OF THEM. The rest of me is an uncaring seashell. #TeamProtectCaitsFeelingsTheyreAnEndangeredSpecies
^THIS. THIS MADE MY LIFE. XD
“I have no life. Just endless parties in my head.” <–Life goals there. <3
OH MY WORD YOUR SNIPPETSSS!!! XDDDDD I AM DYING OF LAUGHTER. (Because… dying… and ghosts… Ohmyword you turned me into a Punning Toulouse.) Their bickering is the ABSOLUTE BEST OF EVER!!!! I LOVELOVELOVE WHEN YOU SHARE SNIPPETS OH MY GOODNESS THANK YOU SO MUUUUCH FOR SHARING THEM BECAUSE THEY MAKE ME HAPPY AND ARE HILARIOUS AND SNARKY AND THEREFORE THE BEST. 😀
ANYWAYS THIS POST MADE MY DAY ALSKDJFLSDKJFLK THANK YOU. DEFINITELY WRITE BOOKS MORE OFTEN.
THE BEANSTALK IS DEFINITELY NEXT ON MY TO-DO LIST. *nods wildly* I did have a 2 day break between writing the books though. So it was like 4 days work, 2 days off, 4 days on.😂 And I was super worried I’d be too tired but apparently it worked?!?? I don’t know if this is a feat to repeat though.😂😂
YAS FOR WRITING FUELLED BY CHOCOLATE. You know all the secrets. :’) And omg I didn’t realise I did the 8K in 2.5 hours….wow. I’m impressed with me. Break out the cake.😂
Toulouse would be VERY proud of that pun.😂 I’m soooo glad you liked the puns, too, but fajdksalfdj I get so nervous that my humour is secretly only amusing to me SO THANK YOU. <3 MY LIFE IS MADE.
😀 😀 😀
Just… 😀
I’M GLAD YOU LIKE. 🎉🎉
Hey, any book that ends with “screaming” has to be good and also soul-crushing, amiright? Plus, I say if your book has ghosts, dancing, death, and cats, it’s pretty balanced out. You’ve got the good, the bad, the cute, and the terrifying. (Also the puns, which makes every book better by 1000%.)
OMG, I totally want to make a writing log now! That’s such a cool idea. But I work so slowly and on so many different projects at once, I’d probably just end up making a way too long chart that’s horrifically embarrassing. xD
Ugh, isn’t it so annoying how the animals always steal the show? Nobody can own a cat or dog or pigeon without them thinking they’re the star.
I totally love French names for some reason. Juliette, Antoinette, Cosette . . . so maybe it’s just the “-ette” names. And any chance I get, I make some magic spell or potion or something fantasy-related French??? It’s a weird obsession.
Death by overuse of puns is a noble death, and nobody can convince me otherwise.
I WOULD TOTALLY WATCH THAT MOVIE.
FATHER SPEAKS THE TRUTH. I always think I know how my book is going to end, but nope, surprise! The characters have other plans.
Gavriel has an attitude problem. Those puns are golden.
Everyone needs ghost friends so you can eat their food. #SquadGoals
I have a hard time jumping into a new project right away. I usually take a big ol’ break after finishing something because I’m too sad to move on from those characters and that world. xD
YOU ARE SO RIGHT! *tosses confetti* And I mean, screaming is a lovely word to end on. So much potential. And usually I don’t take much notice of what my last words are, but this time they fit so well omg. I’m like cleverer than I thought. :’) *has a moment* *falls on face and remembers is a secret dork* 😂😂
YAS DO WRITING LOGS IT’S REALLY FUN!! It was also fun to see how somedays I could write 30K in 7 hours and some days it was waaay over 8 hours.😂 Like obviously the quicker days where when I got to write puns and torture. All the nice stuff was harder to write.😂
And dude, YES. Animals. What can we even do with them. I didn’t even write them into the outline and they were everywhere. Toulouse kept sneaking them into restaurants and it was glorious.
Gavriel just needs to find some happiness tbh. It’s like being a dead ghost has made him miserable or something.
I totally get you with needing the break!! I told myself I’d use March for editing but honestly I just want to wallow in missing these lot.😂
I applaud for finishing two books in a week and one day! I used to love writing, and I could barely finish a book. I always ended up falling out of love with the idea and completely scrapping it and starting over again. And that’s with you being able to juggle blogging and social media and reading, so congratulations for being able to do ALL THE THINGS. I wish I could, but I suck at multi-tasking! 😂
And, yeah for adult fantasy! I still haven’t read one yet (#why), and I absolutely must soon enough because I’ve gotten so many recs and they’re all so gigantic, so I never feel like sitting down and reading them. These are the problems bookworms face. 😩
Omg don’t worry! I definitely didn’t blog/read while I was writing!! 😂 That’s why my blog/goodreads were like DEAD these last few weeks!!! Multitasking and I = worst nemesis.
Adult fantasy is kind of terrifying in size. I HEAR YOU. I prefer reading them via audiobooks because at least I don’t break my wrists.😂
CAAAIITTTT, you’re incredible – seriously! Also, your books always sound SO INTERESTING, like, can I just read them all now? Please?? And those snippets are HILARIOUS! I LOVE TOULOUSE, he’s my spirit animal – I live for puns.
*flails wildly for 9000 years* THANK YOU, KYRA, YOU ARE SO INCREDIBLY NICE TO ME. <3
This is so fun!! I can’t wait to read your books someday. And this makes me even more excited to finish the books I’m writing right now. One is nice (meaning only two people die(so far haha)) and full of wishes and magic and pretty words and the other is still outline shaped and includes murderous Parisian pickpockets who wear necklaces made of bones. It will be wonderful.
OMG BOTH YOUR BOOKS SOUND AMAZING AND I AM HERE DROOLING OVER THEM. Especially murderous Parisian pickpockets.😍😍😍 Your ideas are GOLD, Lenna, GOLD.
Wow, you just made my day!! Thanks! I just finished outlining the first half and it is already 2,000 words long. I’m excited to get to the actual writing!
Ahhh that’s spectacular news!!! And oh your outline is all growing up, eeep, that’s so spectacular. :’) I HOPE YOU HAVE FUN WITH IT!
I love your blog, but I don’t usually take the time to comment, but I just have to this time because of your writing. It’s so hilarious and inspires me to write funny like that, but I usually can’t. Anyways, did you think of all those puns? Because they’re amazing. I might be slightly bias because I love all things puns, but still. Please teach me your secrets. Thanks so much for this 🙂
-Sarah
foreverchanged13.blogspot.com
I appreciate this comment soooo much, Sarah! THANK YOU FOR THE TIME. <3 And omg I'm just so happy you liked it!! I'm actually flailing out of my eyeballs basically. Some of the puns I'd heard before and some I just made up.😂
I can’t believe you wrote TWO books (!) and your brain didn’t melt. You deserve cake!
I’m surprised my brain didn’t melt either, tbh.😂 I think it helped that for some reason these were really easy books to write. Unlike last NaNo where I nearly collapsed haha.😂 THANK YOU, INKLING, YOU ARE KIND.
THOSE SNIPPETS. XD Good glory, Cait, I want to be their BFF. They sound like a marvelous group of weirdos. Also, ALL THE PUNS. I am on Toulouse’s side. Puns are the highest form of humor. *nods* Most definitely.
They are the most marvellous weirdos. 😂 And honestly completely annoying to each other BUT AH THE FUNNESS OF FRIENDSHIP. Puns are total cleverness and underestimated. :’)
(I’m so glad you liked them eeeeep thankyou!!)
I started freaking out when I read what your novel was about because dancers and it totally makes me think of Phantom of the Opera and I’m Phantom trash. Seriously, it sounds so amazing. And I LOVED the snippets. Now I’m even more excited to get my hands on your books. Like I need to read them now. Oh, and the puns! Those were great. I was laughing way too hard when I read those. XD
It is actually a Phantom of the Opera retelling!! It’s kind of wildly different from the original…but there are themes.😂 Although I made the Opera Ghost and the Phantom two different people instead of the same. IT WAS SO FUN TO WRITE THO. OMG. I’M GLAD YOU LIKE HOW IT SOUNDS!! *flails*
YOUR SNIPPET ABOUT WRITING BEING A SURPRISE IS LITERALLY ME. And yes, the book I was writing over NaNo turned out quite differently than I thought it would…and I’m getting ideas for edits and those are even MORE different. So. Plus I have a fantasy novel in my head that keeps changing its premise every time I blink, and I’m not sure what’s going to happen when I actually write it. (Not to mention that when I do, I’ll have a high fantasy and a contemporary in the works at the same time. Hopefully this doesn’t get too confusing.)
That’s so awesome that your books are growing by themselves!! EXCITED FOR YOU. 🎉🎉 And honestly not knowing exactly how it’s going to turn out is kind of a great part about writing…I mean, I had a 12,000-word outline for this book and it SILL surprised me.😂
I love that you work on multiple books! SAME. I plot at least two at once. Currently I have two sort-of fantasy ideas happening and I’m planning a 5th book in an adult epic fantasy series AND I’m revisiting 2 contemporaries in my head. 😂 I don’t even know anymore. AH THE WRITERS LIFE.
Oh my goodness.
There is SO MUCH SASS IN THIS POST. I AM DYING. You are a Brilliant Dragon Queen, Master of All the Puns. And I think my favorite snippet is the one where the extremely irritated ghost asks for a show of hands for who likes Toulouse’s puns. Eeeehehehehe I have such a strong, hilarious visual for that scene. (Random Q – did you get lots of typos writing Toulouse’s name?)
YAAAS I’M SO GLAD YOU LIKED IT.🎉🎉🎉 My day is made!! :’) And I’m glad you liked that snippet because honestly Toulouse got what was coming for a looooong time. I’m surprised he survived so long. 😂
CAIT! I’m DYING! I feel like EVERY SINGLE TIME I read one of your posts, I laugh out loud! Thank’s for the post! HAVE AN AMAZING DAY!
-Jared
THIS MAKES ME VERY HAPPY, THANK YOU, JARED. 🎉🎉
Toulouse trying to be “helpful” by eating another’s pastry. 🙂 I liked that.
I’m impressed that you were able to track your writing time so… neatly. Back in high school, I had to keep track of community service, athletic, and artistic hours… and I was terrible at it. I even had a stopwatch so I could keep track, but I inevitably forgot to hit the button when I was done with my activity, so it was pretty much useless. I ended up having to estimate. Just thinking about trying to do the same thing with my writing hours makes me kind of anxious!
Sequels are pesky things sometimes. They can just pop up and say, “Write me now!” and you really have no choice but to do it, unless you want to be tormented by words and phrases and characters intruding into your thoughts for the next few months. I wrote my first sequel 15 years ago (OMG… I’m old). After agonizing over the first book for ages, outlining and drawing maps and coming up with character names and plotting out every last detail, and finally spending two months writing the first draft… I went and wrote the sequel in two weeks. Maybe sequels are easier because you’ve already laid out all the groundwork, so you can just follow the characters and story where they lead you.
And can you live on cake alone? Technically, you probably can. Especially if it’s one of those “healthy” chocolate cakes that uses black beans in the recipe. Throw some fresh strawberries on top and you’re good to go.
Tbh that’s something I would do so I’m not sure if that was too much author-insertion right there. :’)
I totally get that! My family all thinks I’m a bit crazy obsessed with how well I track time.😂 But I literally live life on a schedule so tracking the hours was actually the most fun thing for me.😍 It was also interesting to see how I basically wrote at the same times. YA I’M HAVING A NERD MOMENT.
I love how you wrote your sequel so fast!! THAT IS THE BEST!! Like I hadn’t read a sequel in 5 years so I was super nervous…but it turns out it’s kind of easy because all the plot/characters are set up and you don’t have to spend so much time explaining, right?!? I LOVE IT. I WANT TO WRITE ALL THE SEQUELS NOW.😍
And exactly. *nods* Healthy cake is what I eat anyway tbh. I have this brownie recipe that is mostly zucchini and it’s delicious and I ate a vegetable so #win.
DUDE SO LIKE I WRITE 2 PARAGRAPHS IN 4 DAYS IDEK HOW YOU DO THINGS. Also like I want to take days off life just to do things I like, bc why not? Except that thing called school which I have and you don’t, so like, #UNFAIRNESSANDTHINGS
Also those snippets are great!!
AGh that thing called school does get in the way *nods sadly* TBH when I was in school I probably wrote like 2 paragraphs a day and that was the best I could do.😂 We do what we can right!??
THANK YOU THO! I’M GLAD YOU LIKED THE SNIPPETS!
That was scary to read. *slow claps* I still think you’re insane. GO GIRL!
#supportinsanity
THANK YOU. *bows* 😂😂 I’m glad you liked the post!
AHHH, CAIT. WELCOME BACK to the blog-y world! *all the stardust-tossing over Queen Cait*
Oh good gracious YOUR SNIPPETS. I don’t care what number this book came up as in the poll – I LOVE IT YOU DID A WONDEROUS JOB. Your characters are all the best <3. And HOW did you write to giant books back to back without exploding?! *stares at the two precious books suspiciously* I think you had help from your pet dragons xD.
And OH YES, April Camp – I'm majorly excited for it and I plan to write more words in one month than I ever ever had before. Either it will be fun or I will explode from sheer exhaustion and writer's block xD.
*flails happily in star dust* WHY THANK YOU, KIND SOUL. And ahhhhh I’m so glad you like the sound of it! That makes me so ridiculously happy I cannot even. :’) And honestly I don’t know how I didn’t explode?!? Day 3 of the second book I was very tired. Because I kept overhyping myself and writing so late I couldn’t sleep.😂 What is my life. BUT ANYWAY. It’s done!! I’m really happy and I was really excited to see how far I could push myself!!
YAS YOU’RE DOING NANO IN APRIL TOO!! *hi fives* We shall be able to flail together. Exploding is totally an option for all we writers for sure. Stockpile cake!!! That is the answer!!!
MAHAHA THE PUNS ARE SO BAD BUT I LOVE THEM. Also great name choice. Also I’ve actually been meaning to tell you that I grew an extra head when you were gone! It’s hair is coming along pretty fantastically if you wanted to know. ALSO YAY FOR SNIPPETS. Now just post the whole book?? 🙂
Simi
SO SO BAD. I’M SO PROUD OF HOW BAD THEY ARE. Tbh I don’t know how Toulouse got through the books without being strangled by all his friends. He’s so gloriously annoying. :’)
CONGRATS ON YOUR EXTRA HEAD!!!! I knew exciting things must’ve been happening while I was gone!!
YOU ARE A RIDICULOUS HUMAN BEING. My PB for a single day is 10k, and even then my hands felt like they were going to fall off. ARE YOU EVEN REAL????? Also I love the snippets because #puns. And Toulouse is just the best name.
ps can I read them
I AM MAYBE NOT REAL. *existential crisis intensifies* Although tbh, 10K used to seem ridiculously out of reach for me once, SO. It just takes being obsessed pretty much. :’)
PS. I would looooove you to read them when they’re edited. <3 <3
I love Gabriel and Toulouse. They are a special level of precious. You better not have hurt them.
I did. OH I DID.
Oh my goodness your puns are spectacular! I love the relationship between Toulouse and Gavriel already! Also, I LOVE that he is named for the Aristocats. And that he has a cat. Cats in books are like the most wonderful thing in the world. Aside from stabbing in books. And cats that encourage stabbing in books. And your books sound so good! I’m intrigued to learn more about the plot, and just generally read them. But we shall all sit back and let you edit first. And have some much-needed personal space while you let the words simmer untouched. *sigh*
I’m planning on doing Camp NaNoWriMo in April too 🙂 Though I will be NOWHERE NEAR 200k per every 8 days. Not happening. I’m hoping to finish my prequel before April, then use April to write book 2. And at some point go through and edit book 1 from last Nov.
I’ve never even written cats into a book because I’m a dog person….but it was SO FUN.😂 I will have to do it again for sure. Eeeep. I’m glad you liked my Aristocat references. What can I say. DISNEY WAS MY CHILDHOOD.
Aww, thank you! I’m glad they’re intriguing!! And hopefully one day I’ll be able to do something exciting with them because I loooove these ones so much.
YAY YOU’RE DOING CAMP IN APRIL TOO! *hi fives* I doubt I’ll write quite this much then too.😂 And good luck with the edits too!! I need to start on editing a project but honestly…writing first drafts is so much more exciting. (Bad cait, bad.😂)
First, omg thank you for this glorious cupcake. Second, YOUR NOVELS SOUND SO AWESOME AND AMAZING AND MAGICAL AND AAAAAGGGHHHH. Third, those snippets were beautiful and snarky and great. I like Toulouse already–GREAT PUNS. Fourth, THIS ID LIKE THE THIRD TIME I’VE SEEN THAT FONT OMG IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL WHAT IS ITS NAME I MUST HAVE IT TELL ME WHAT IT IS CALLED CAIT.
Me? Obsessing over a font? Hahaha you’re funny.
But eek, I love your writing and story ideas and writing style and dialogue and everything. *claps* BRAVO!
(But seriously, what is that font called???)
YOU MAKE ME SMILE SO MUCH YOU HAVE NO IDEA OMG. THANK YOU MAY. <3 THANK YOU ETERNALLY. Also the font is Cochin!!! It's really nice right?!? It's the default font on Scrivener which is why I end up using it.😂
YOU’RE WELCOME CAIT-WHO-IS-VERY-WONDERFUL-AND-SHOULD-RECOGNIZE-THAT. And agh that is a beautiful font must download now asdfghjkl. And EEK I MUST HAVE SCRIVENER RIGHT NOW BUT I’M BROKE #thestruggle
Scrivener is honestly LIFE and I totally recommend it!! The fact that you have to pay is the sad downside. 😭😭 They do sales around NaNo though I think?!
Scrivener seems super cool and I want it SO BAD. Yeah, they do! But… NaNo is… so… far… away… XD
I love your writing! My favorite quotes are the #squadgoals, and The Parenting is A+ in this Novel. I love sarcasm and I use it in my day to day life:) People around me don’t find it as amusing. I will probably never have the drive that you have to write. Plus I feel like I write slow. I also hate to edit! I have not even finished my last NaNo. I started editing the first half before I write the second half. But I hated editing the first half and never finished editing. Urgh…why is editing so slow and meticulous. I haven’t written anything in a wrong-age category, yet. I don’t like to set what I write for an age group, it makes me feel limited in what I can write. So I just kind of write and then label its genre and age group. I understand about sharing writing to. I don’t like to share mine but I share some of it, but I always feel like I want to snatch it out of the persons hands while they read it. I love your quotes though!!!! And yes, I could live off of cake alone, but it would be a sad world without ice-cream.
Oh oh thank you SO MUCH Leah. <3 It's so intensely encouraging (and relieving haha!!) to know you like them!! And omg what is it with people not finding our marvellous sarcasm amusing? Shame on them. We are obviously the pinnacles of wit. 😂
Editing is honestly PAIN so I completely understand!! My aim is to start editing in March but mostly I want to pretend I didn't make that goal.😂
That's actually really awesome how you just write and then see how it comes and decide labels later. *nods* You are wise. I always considered myself a 100% YA author up until about September last year. Then I discovered I don't mind writing adult fantasy.😂
Icecream CAKE though, however, is the answer to all our problems.
if you really want a drug, there’s a few XD like valium and such. Good job writing so much! And I should say that February ate you and spat you out because you tasted horrible.
And what is Shah Ru Khan doing as a meme ?
Haha, yes February wouldn’t want to eat me. I’m all bitter and stringy. :’)
These snippets are adorable. I love the puns; they’re great xD I love reading the snippets you have on twitter, too. And I’m not gonna lie, I’m kind of jealous of your writing speed. I can finish a first draft in a couple months (not too terrible), but I can’t read anything at the same time. Though revising for me is its own special kind of spider-infested hell. I think I might be able to write this much if I had the time, but alas, I work about ten hours a day. My weekend is my only real time to write (and I use it well).
OH THANK YOU. <3 That's so encouraging and you're the nicest. 😊😊 I don't read and write at the same time either!! I read like ONE book in this entire time and it was 160 pages and I read it on the day in-between haha. So me? Multitask? Nopity no.😂
Revising is a spider-infested hell. RELATABLE. Ugh. *runs away screaming from it*
Thank you so much for sharing some snippets with us! I’m sure that was probably super nerve wracking! I loved them! I can’t wait to read your published works one day! It will totally happen!
It is always super nerve-wracking sharing writing!! BUT WORTH IT FOR REACTIONS.😂 It’s always nice to know if my humour is actually funny to anyone besides my warped brain bahaha.😂 ahem.
HOW CAN YOU LEAVE ME WITH JUST THOSE SNIPPETS? They were amazing and I want more and why the heck aren’t you self-publishing these so I CAN BUY THEM IMMEDIATELY?
BTW, you are my writing hero. Because the way you write, you’d release 50 books a year and that’s an author I can get on board with! Puh to all these authors who take ALL YEAR TO WRITE ONE MEASLY BOOK. There’s just no need, when you can crank a book out in a day!
BECAUSE I’M MEAN.😂 But omg that just makes me flail out of my skin that you would want to read more. 😱😱😱😊😊💕 *hugs you*
I’d totally release 50 books a year *nods* Obvious goals for the future.
OH MY GOODNESS Like, you are literal writing goals right now. You are an inspiration, my dear.
YOU ARE TOO KIND. *gives you cake and flails*
THIS POST SDFSGJHDKAJLKSAJD SO MANY FEELS AND I DON’T HAVE TIME TO FLAIL ABOUT THEM ALL BUT OMG THIS IS THE GREATEST THING EVER OK <3333333 First off you are a literal SUPERHERO and you probably hear that from everyone but PFFT IT BEARS REPEATING. YOU ARE A LITERAL SUPERHERO. HOW DO YOU WRITE SO QUICKLY??? LIKE NOT EVEN WRITE BUT TYPE. I couldn't TRANSCRIBE 200k in 8 days. *awards you with many many waffles because obvious reasons* Also you were sick. Like….how do you not veg on the couch with a completely dead brain and watch 10 hours of TV without moving because that's all I can manage to do when I'm sick. YOU'RE OBVIOUSLY NOT HUMAN. *moar waffles*
THE SNIPPETS ASJLFKJDKLS ARE THE BEST SFHLKAJFKS THING SHLFJAKJLGKSH EVER. OH MY GOODNESS I'm just sitting here laughing out loud and lowkey crying because THESE CHARACTERS ARE SUCH SASSY HILARIOUS BEANS OMG. <3 I LOVE THEM ALREADY. Also the setting sounds freaking epic!!! AND I'M ALL ABOUT JUMPING OFF ROOFS (or was it not voluntary?? either way) AND BURNING THINGS DOWN AND SCREAMING <333 it sounds wonderful tbh. :') PLEASE DON'T LET IT ROT FOR LONG BECAUSE WE ALL NEED THESE BOOKS IN OUR LIVES!! Also I totally get you about writing a book and then finishing it and being like "uh maybe this isn't quite for that age group after all lol" I kind of experienced that with my last book because things got a little heavy and my lovely character beans got a little angry and….it's still beautiful for what it is. I HOPE. *concerned laughter*
THANK YOU FOR BLESSING MY LIFE WITH THESE SNIPPETS!!!!
*tackle hugs* AREN’T YOU SO NICE TO ME OMG ABBIEE. I’LL JUST SQUISH YOU FOREVER NOW. And trust me, the writing-speed-thing is just a combination of working up to this for yeeeeears. About 2 years ago I thought 10K was absolutely insane.😂 And now look at me. (Ok I secretly want to do 50K in one day but I’ve literally run out of hours so.)
Probably most likely a dragon tbh. Not human.
Aren’t they the sassiest??!😂 I feel bad though because Gavriel gets so much thrown at him. What did he even do to deserve all of this.
I’m so glad I’m not the only one who accidentally writes from the wrong category then.😂 I mean, like we are writing FOR THE CHILDREN and then it turns out to be NOT FOR THE CHILDREN???? PROTECT THE CHILDREN???? *covers the children’s eyes from our works*
I feel you should know your (well, Toulouse’s) terrible puns are making me laugh indecently hard 😉
I want to hug Gavriel. He’s angry and fierce and insecure and also very very dead. #aminlove
My favorite snippet is INDUBITABLY the last one, “Everyone Wants To Be Alliterated.” No contest there. It’s perfect.
Oh . . . do you know what I did???? I REACHED 40000 WORDS IN MY W.I.P. WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT. I know that doesn’t sound like MUCH but I write pretty slowly so it’s a huge deal for me. I’m probably about halfway through right now, actually. THERE IS LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL. #winning
THAT MAKES ME SO HAPPY OMG I CANNOT EVEN.😂 I get worried that my sense of humour is probably only humours to me…so it’s actually a relief to know it’s genuinely funny.😂 Although Toulouse seriously needs to nope. Gavriel spends the book being 5000% done with him.
YAYYYYYS THAT YOU REACHED 40K THAT IS AMAZING, JESSICA. IT IS A HUGE DEAL!! I hope you’re celebrating?!? Always celebrate milestones. With cake. This is professional advice I’m sure.
THANK YOU. I WILL DEFINITELY CELEBRATE. *bows to the Dragon Queen’s professional will*
OMG Cait!! that’s awesome! I love it you always manage to make me laugh! I want to write a blog post like you one day… (right now they are short and dull).. lol You did a great job and I love love love the snippets!!
I have a book in ;my head I keep saying I will write one day, just not sure when that day will come….
and lets be real.. of course you can survive on just cake alone. well and tea, cause you know you have to have something to drink.. 🙂
thanks for the laughs!
Llissa
Yaaaas I’m so glad it made you laugh! I’M SO HAPPY. *flails* And don’t worry — the more you blog, the easier it gets, I promise! And omg I hope you do write your book someday. Make sure it happens. It’s the most rewarding thing ever. 😉
And YAS agreed. Tea is also needed to wash the cake down. :’)
I am so in awe of you and jealous at the same time! 200,00 words in 8 days, what even!!!!!! I seriously admire your ability to sit down and WRITE, I could use some of that. And the snippets are awesome, your writing style is so much fun to read just like your blog posts 🙂
Aww, thank you, Morgan!! For some reason I can totally hyper-focus for writing but not for much else. 😂 THANK YOU THOUGH THIS IS LIKE THE MOST ENCOURAGING THING EVER. <3
Love the snippets!! These books sound pleasantly awesome.
Also, how in the world are you so productive with writing?!?!?! I’m both astounded and exhausted thinking about writing that much in so short a time. lol!
OMG THANK YOU. *gives you cake of appreciation* Honestly I think I’m just obsessed with writing and that’s how I get so much done.😂
Haha!! You should find a way to bottle that obsession and sell it as “writer fuel”. 😀 I would invest.
1000 words in an hour is enormously good for me. But I might just be a regular snail.
OMG 200,000 words in 8 DAYS????!!!!!!!!! You must KILL Nanowrimo! (excuse me while I stick my bulging cartoon eyeballs back in their sockets :P) I only recently discovered your blog and I’m now beginning to realize why it’s called paperFURY XD. I started my own book blog last month and it’s kinda boring now I think but I hope it gets to be as cool as yours someday. 🙂
I tried nano for the first time last year and I made it to 27,000 words in 15 days before I got burned out. 2,000 words in a day was exhausting for me, there’s NO WAY I can write that much that fast any time soon.
I LOVE your snippets! Your characters are hilarious. 😀
Oh btw, my Goodreads TBR is up to 956 now. 😛
AFJDKASL THANK YOU, HEATHER, YOU KIND SOUL. *squishes you* I did actually do NaNo in 3 days last year.😂 This year I might get it done in 2?? heeh. And omg I’m so glad you’ve just found my blog and WELCOME and here is cake for you. *gives you all the welcome cake*
And honestly the writing-so-much-in-one-day thing just takes time and practise and probably a lot of cake and a good dash of insanity. But mostly practise.😂 You’ll get there!!!
Awe, thank you. 😊 You’re so awesome.
The combination of Toulouse and Gavriel remind me of Robert Downey Jr and Jude Law in Sherlock Holmes. That witty and sarcastic charm just gets me! I really enjoyed these little snippets. I am definitely looking forward to more of your work <3
That is like the best compliment EVER. 😍😍 Although I have to admit Toulouse is no genius like Sherlock.😂 Basically the opposite…BUT I LOVE HIM STILL, THE LITTLE IDIOT.
Thank you soooo much!! I’m glad you liked them!!
WOW. That is seriously super impressive!! HOW ARE YOU NOT DEAD? Unless you secretly are and now you’re a ghost dragon with a blog? I wish I had the ability to super focus on writing like that, I might actually get stuff done lol. Unfortunately, I have the most distractable brain in existence and literally get distracted by a blank wall.
Those snippets are fantastic! The most beautifully puntastic thing I’ve ever seen and I want to read these books so bad! Toulouse and Gavriel are just the best only I worry about Toulouse a bit and that Gavriel will kill him for one pun too many.
It’s weird to think that camp nano is only a month away! Will you be writing one of the other books from the poll? I’ll probably get started on a YA fantasy series I’m super excited about because death and destruction everywhere!
I’m probably a ghost dragon with a blog, tbh, and this is actually my ghost typing…which is coincidentally excellent research for my book!! SO I’M WINNING HERE!! *flails ghostily in the darkness* And omg the super focus is like the best thing of my life.😂I can’t do it for anything else..but writing? Leave me alone for days and I’ll probably write until my keyboard breaks.😂
I’M SO GLAD YOU LIKED THE SNIPPETS. <3 That makes my day!!! I gotta admit...Toulouse has it coming. He is so horribly annoying and I love him.😂
Oh oh oh a YA fantasy series about death and destruction?! *begins cheering wildly for you* I AM HERE FOR THAT!! And omg yes it's weird to think April is so near. Eeek! I *hope* I'll write the pirate book in April but I won't lock myself down until like a few days before. Just in case I get smacked in the face with something else. 😜
I love everything about this post 😍😍😍 The snippets are my favourite (as always) and your humour is hilarious (as the term suggests) 💕💕 I’m so excited for all of your writing!
OMG I’M SO GLAD YOU LIKED IT!! And relieved that my humour is actually funny to more people than just me hahh.😂
All the time 🙂 I often go on twitter just to stalk your tl
TEE HEE THE KLEPTOMANIAC GAVRIEL. Love ittttttttttt omgeeee. SERIOUSLY CAIT HOWW. I have been totally slacking on my writing (MY OUTLINE IS ONLY HALF DONE IN 2 MONTHS WOE IS MEEEEEEE). Basically you are my idol NOT EVEN JOKING. Now you are inspiring me to get over myself and just finish that darn outline (the evil thing) so that I can procrastinate writing the actual book!! Bless you.
N’awww yOU MAKE ME SMILE, THANK YOU!! And yes! Yes! Work on that outline! CONQUER THE OUTLINE!! I’m kind of squishing this book because it came together and is fully written in 6 weeks and like duuuude that’s an all time record for me so either I’m a secret genius or else I badly ripped something off and just haven’t noticed yet.😂 Let’s pretend it’s the first and not the latter. AHEM.
Hi Cait! I loved the snippets and would actually love to read the entire two books! I was just wondering (and I’m sorry if you’ve answered this question already!) if there are any characters belonging to lgbtq+ or any not-white characters. I would love that! Keep up the good work .xx
There are actually! Toulouse (protagonist) is both. 😊 And I will be doing very serious research/getting sensitivity readers later on too to make sure it’s accurate. And THANK YOU KIND SOUL. THIS IS SO SO ENCOURAGING. 💕💕
CAIT! HOLY FROSTING!
I LOVE YOUR CHARACTERS SO MUCH! I WANT THESE BOOKS!!
I WAS IN CLASS (supposed to be doing work of course, but it was boring and I’ve had this blog pulled up for a few days waiting for a good time to read it) ANYWAYS! THESE SNIPPETS ARE SO PERFECT AND WONDERFUL I WISH I COULD WRITE AS MUCH AS YOU DO! 25 BOOKS! THAT”S INCREDIBLE!! AND THE PUNS!!! IDK WHO FRANK IS BUT I NEED HIM TO HOLD ME AS WELL I AM DELIRIOUS FROM LAUGHTER!! I LOVE IT!!!
THANK YOU, TONI. THIS JUST MAKES MY DAY. I AM SO HAPPPPPY.💕 *flails*
You are now my writer mom and I now and forever will look up to you just as a baby dragon would look up to you. *tearing up* Seriously though, you are a total inspiration. I miss my own book babies so much and I feel like I’m letting them down by taking so long to write them. ALSO THEY WOULD GET ALONG SO WELL WITH TOULOUSE AND GAVRIEL!! LIKE WOW!! AND PROBABLY ALSO THE CAT!
P.s: when I read any of your blog posts I immediately want cake..so your mind control has worked.
Omo that line about Toulouse explaining his puns XD I laughed so hard.
ALSO EXCUSE ME BUT I MIGHT BE FALLING IN LOVE WITH GAVRIEL AND I DID NOT ASK FOR ANOTHER CAIT-CREATED GHOST TO LOVE, DO YOU MIND.
How is Toulouse even STILL EXISTING. I’m surprised Gavriel didn’t murder him in bk 1 honestly. The line where Gavriel takes a vote is near the end of bk 2 because he is just so 50000% done with him by that point. :’) It’s beautiful.
HEY I CAN’T HELP IT THAT MY GHOSTS ARE TRAGIC AND SO CUTE THO. And I’m pleased because he’s very different from Thomas but still adorable. 😍 Thomas will stab you in the face, but Gavriel will hoard shiny things and feel personally victimised when people make jokes about him.
so basically they both need hugs
no wonder I love them
(I did love that line about him stealing props because he was bored of being dead XD)
HUG ALL THE GHOSTS.😍 Except I suppose that depends if Gavriel survives mwahhahahh hahahhhhhhahh.
*chokes on own evil*
*needs to go sit down*
the irony of that line is not lost on me
but also
i’m even more concerned now
can you not
DID YOU MEAN TO TYPE “CAN I YES”…BECAUSE YES!!!!!
NO I DID NOT TO MEAN TO TYPE ANYTHING ELSE I TYPED EXACTLY WHAT I MEANT TO TYPE
WHICH IS ALWAYS
AND WILL ALWAYS BE
FOREVER AND EVER
“CAIT CAN YOU NOT”
BUT ALL I CAN HEAR IS “CAIT YES”.
YOUR EARS ARE BROKEN
If it’s got puns, I want it. When you publishin’? 😀
My phone actually corrected puns to nouns. Which is even funnier. If it’s got nouns… yeah.
I am imagining all sorts of colorful covers for your books, and it is making me curious to no end.
It seems you were pretty much writing full time though! Mostly 8 hours a day. Impressive! You must be super tired. Sorry you had to get sick as well! I went through food poisoning (or something) last week as well, if it makes you feel any better. At least we’re through that now 🙂
And the blogging world missed you as well.
Puns are my language honestly. Particularly bad ones. 😊 Although tbh I’m surprised Toulouse is actually alive because his level of bad puns is VERY BAD. 😂
Omg no food poisoning is awful!! I’m sorry for you too!! Getting sick is the absolute worst…like I handle the flu or whatever, but not vomiting.😒🙈 STILL AT LEAST WE ARE BOTH ALIVE. GOOD JOB US.
I LOVE THIS POST IT HAD ME LAUGHING FOR LIKE TEN MINUTES. I am now calm enough to type a response. This story sounds amazing!! My favorite snippet by a narrow margin is the alliterated part. Yes. That gorgeous collection of dialogue. Also, the funny thing is, in real life, I think Toulouse would annoy the brain out of me, but in this context I love him.
And yes, I wrote a sci-fi thing once and it accidentally was a fantasy story…Funny how that happened. It’s still a mystery. I have trouble with finishing stories in general, but for my NaNo novel one year, I finished then went right into another project. My brain has never fully pieced itself back together…
YES IF CAKE WERE THE ONLY FOOD I THINK I COULD EXIST NO PROBLEM. In all seriousness, I don’t know if I’d make it without m&m cookies though.
Anyways, THIS HAS BEEN FUN. I am looking forward to future posts!
AWW, THAT MAKES ME SO INTENSELY HAPPY. 💕💕 And honestly Toulouse is an annoying brat who needs to be hi-fived in the face with a chair, but yet somehow I love him. But seriously if he gets smacked in the head by Gavriel, he WILL deserve it.😂
So it’s now a sci-fi/fantasy/mYSTERY!!! Genre combination ftw!!😂 Just teasing. 😉 I think books can sometimes ridiculously have minds of their own and it’s so rude. Like we are supposed to be the bosses here??? How dare they??
Yep. All those punssssssss. I love them.
True. Scifi fantasy mystery is a complicated genre mix. Don’t think I’ve read one of those before! XD Yes, and not just always the characters. I’m a firm believer that the book also has a mind of its own, and it chooses to side AGAINST ME, the author.
CAIT I NEED THIS. Seriously, your ability to have snippets like this in the actual pages of trash that are first drafts is amazing. I also appricate that you named your main character after a cartoon cat, because, in all honesty, that totally sounds like something i would do, too.
Awww, *blushes and then flail with happiness* Honestly this is the most encouraging thing of ever, THANK YOU FOR SAYING THIS, AINE. BLESS YOUR NICENESS. Also stealing names from Disney is obviously the best thing I can do here. What else was my childhood for.
CAIT. You are a magic writing dragon queen. I worship at your feet and I want these books because those snippets are everything.
I couldn’t choose between 2 WIP’S for myself and asked Twitter and they decided I should do both at once which ahahahaha nope. So I’m writing a YA Urban Fantasy story with a magic circus and demons and stabby and shooty things and a polyamorous romance. I’m 13K in and I adore it lots. These characters are everything.
I can throw it at you when it’s done right??
Omg, your book premise sounds amazing and exactly what I need in my life! If you ever need beta readers, I volunteer as tribute!
N’AWW, THANKS, BEE. *flails happily* I saw your poll! I can’t remember which I voted for…probably both because I’m mean haha. No wait! I think I voted for the contemporary. 😂 Either way I know it’ll be spectacular whatever you write!
Toulouse is such an interesting name, and even more interesting because ARISTOCATS.
Also, this: Have the trees waged war against the thousands of deaths of their brothers whom we call paperbacks and keep covertly in bookshelves?” Cait. XD It made me think of Ents and the trees from Narnia and how I’d very much like to be on their side.
Or maybe we’ll just make books out of hides and papayrus??
I am SO referencing the Ents, let’s be real here. That was the most moving scene in all of LOTR and all I can think of now is that’s how the end of the world is going to come about: Ents getting their revenge. WE KNOW IT’S GONNA BE THAT WAY.
HOW ON EARTH DID YOU WRITE 200K IN EIGHT DAYS I DO NOT UNDERSTAND
You are my queen.
I basically wrote for 8 hours a day.😂😂 I HAVE NO LIFE.
This is amazing, Cait! The sass is practically at level with Sage from The False Prince. You have to turn this into a real published novel.
Also, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE make it a friendship story! It would be the best thing ever and they are just so hard to find now in YA. Aside from The False Prince and the Brotherband series, I can’t remember the last time I read a YA novel with guy friendships. Gavriel and Toulouse would be the most adorable best friends! *crosses fingers
Aww, thankyou!! I do love The False Prince.😂 Which reminds me I should finish that series sometime…hahah. I’d love for it to be published someady. :’) *fingers crossed*
My favourite snippet has to be the last one. It’s amazing. But all the snippets were hilarious and I love all the puns.
Frankly I think the fact that you managed to write TWO BOOKS and not get writers block is the most astonishing thing ever. How did you do it? Did it require sacrifices to Satan? Deals with demons??! Please tell me so that I can do it too, bc I swear to god if I get writer’s block one more time I shall DIE.
AW THANK YOU. THIS MAKES MY DAY. <3 And absolutely yes: sacrifices to the moon basically. The moon will aid you. (And honestly the 'no writers block' is simply because of my super detailed outlines.😂 I think the outline for book 1 was 11K and then the sequel was 12K...darn that sequel it's so mammoth I think I might strangle it at some point.😂 Ahem.
Okay, so you mentioned not wanting to post about your writing because we might get bored or confused??? I think I speak for EEVVVVVERYONE when I say we WANT to hear more!!! Your snippets are awesome, we want to know all the things, you are a writing genius, and we need to learn how be like you. So. BRING ON THE WRITERLY POSTS.
*squishes you with happy* omg I am SO RELIEVED they’re not boring/confusing out of context!! That’s like my biggest fear.😂😂 I absolutely flail when people say they like my writing…it’s like the biggest encouragement boost of ever. YOU’RE TOO NICE TO ME THO, I SHALL GIVE YOU CAKE AND SQUISH YOU WITH HAPPY.
Oh my gosh, I need to read this book now!
And what? You’ve written 25 books already! 😮 #WriterLifeGoals
I better get movong writing my first book lol.
Good luck for your first book!!! Once you get started you just suddenly have 934893 more ideas you have to write.😂 WRITING IS THE BEST!
You need to find a publisher…soon! Like now soon!!! I love the characters! GIVE ME MORE!!!!
Aww, thanks! Hopefully one day!!😂
HOW DID YOU. WHAT. I AM IN AWE OF YOUR SPEED AND YOUR DEDICATION AND BANTER-WRITING SKILLS AND THOSE PUNS OHMYSQUEE. I’M NOT SURE I CAN PICK MY FAVORITE SNIPPET THEY’RE ALL SO GOOD?? I NEED ALL TWO HUNDRED THOUSAND OF THOSE WORDS. *puppy eyes* PLEASEEEE. IT SOUNDS LIKE THE MOST WONDERFUL STORY and sorry about the all-caps they must hurt your eyes bUUT AAAAAAAHHHH I NEED.
I JUST AM REALLY OBSESSED I GUESS AND WHEN I GET STARTED I DON’T STOP.😂😂 but omg I’m so so flailing at your comment. THANK YOU. <3 My day is made.
THAT’S REALLY AWESOME I’M TOO EASILY DISTRACTED FOR THAT HEH
YOU’RE WELCOME <3 😀
Your book idea sounds so amazing!
Are you considering publishing this? Because I have two actor friends who love les miserables and so, anything to do with France. And they also loves puns. I think they would run over me and their grandma to get a chance to read this book.
(No grandmas were harmed in the making of this metaphor.. Me….that’s another story)
I mean, I would buy it too. but they would probably break into the book store the night before the book came out and steal every. single. copy.
-Mary Kate
OKAY SO THIS BASICALLY 100% MAKES MY DAY. <3 Thank yoooooou. I would love to see it published haha, but I'm not sure when/if that'll ever happen. 😜 But just thank yooooou. This is so encouraging.
I hate you so much for your productivity. Like. HOW DO YOU DO. I’m still stuck with writer’s block, I’m ill and I’m writing a short story about bad guys, sandwiches and eggs because I’m playing Mario & Luigi 3 and because I’m hungry. Like. HOW DO YOU DO. HOW DID YOU WRITE 25 BOOKS. HOW DID YOU WRITE TWO IN A ROW.
Also I’m happy about French names because I’m French. And the puns actually made me laugh, which is bad because I’m sick and my throat’s on fire. But it’s nice. I’d love to read this.
*twirls about like a magical evil fairy wizard* I DON’T EVEN KNOW. I’M ANNOYING. I ADMIT IT. (But omg ugh to being ill. 🙁 *sends you virtual warm soups*) And sandwiches make a great foundation for a story so I heartily approve. And honestly I don’t even know still how I wrote two novels in a row. I did take one day off in between though.😂 I think perhaps I am strange.
Ok firstly those snippets were amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don’t have a favorite because they were all awesome. I love bad jokes and those were the worst….so even better!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Also, I’ve never tried it but I’m sure you can survive on cake. Excuse me while I go and test it.
OMG THANK YOU, POPPY. THAT IS SO NICE OF YOU TO SAY.❤️❤️