I have a few problems.* Specifically BOOKWORM problems.
Trust me, the life of a bookworm is not all fricasseed frogs and eel pie. There are copious complications that can send us into a frizz at any given moment.
Thanks to the latest Top Ten Tuesday prompt…I’m about to explain ALL my bookworm problems.
* I reserve the right to ignore any comments my family may have on this statement. Shhh, peoples, shhh.
* You do get eel pie of you understood this reference!
This Week’s Prompt: Top Ten Book Related Problems I Have
1. When my OTP becomes a Ghost Ship.
Because…seriously?! Why do I always pick the ships where one half DIES. Depending on the book, this doesn’t always matter. (Hello, City of Bones, where everyone at least dies once or so. They come back. It’s okay.) The logical annoyance aside, it’s just furiously saddening when most of my ships are GHOSTS.
2. When nooooo one has read the book I’m flailing over.
IT IS NOT FUN TO FANGIRL ALONE. And yet I continually am shrieking alone. Who has read Disruption by Jessica Shirvington? Who is flailing over The Maze Runner? Can I hear an ajfkdlsad over Gone by Michael Grant, PLEASE?
3. That gargantuan TBR pile.
It grows all on it’s own. It definitely multiples while I’m sleeping.
4. When I get “good-book-stage-fright”.
You haven’t heard of this? LET ME EXPLAIN! (I am awesome at explaining things, shh, shh, don’t disagree.)
“Good-Book-Stage-Fright” is when you know a book will cripple your feels and punch you in the face and turn your world upside down with sheer BRILLIANCE…so you put off the book because you’re not sure you can handle the pain right now. You cannot go on! You cannot read! You just stare at the book and suffer.
This is me and A Court of Thorns and Roses. I can’t. I want to. But I can’t. I’m terrified. And you better believe this is going to get horribly worse when Throne of Glass 4 comes out.
R.I.P. to Cait.
5. When it rains SO MUCH I can’t take good photos for my instagram.
I won’t lie: I love Instagram. I adore that “bookstagram” is all about beautiful pictures of books. Can life get any better?! Someone give me a tissue, I think this Vulcan is shedding a tear in pure happiness.
So when it rains. For weeks on end. It is excruciatingly frustrating. Although it does make for beautiful mossy brick walls as backdrops.
6. When I wreck MY OWN book on accident.
When someone else ruins my book, there is a silver lining. I CAN BLAME THEM! But when I destroy my own gorgeously fabulous book of joy…there is nothing left but to quietly glare at myself.
I took my copy of Divergent camping…it had a nice warm and dry little nook, and yet…there is a GOUGING HOLE in the back. It’s ruined. It’s over. It’s not okay.
7. When someone informs me (to my face) just HOW MUCH they hate my favourite book.
It’s weird how often this happens. But I’ll blog about a book and odds are someone will give me a detailed comment about why they hated it. It happens on instagram, twitter, facebook…where ever. Don’t get me wrong: you don’t have to like what I like! But you also don’t have to dump icy water on my enthusiasm.*
Have you, by chance, seen a wet koala before? It’s kind of like me.
* And seriously, it’s okay to tell me you don’t like a book I’m flailing over. I love your opinions! I’m talking about detailed explanations that go on and on and on about why I AM WRONG. I am not wrong! I am never wrong! Having an opinion is not wrong!
8. When my favourite author doesn’t write enough.
This is the worst, the absolute worst. I know, I know, “one book a year” is completely logical and more than fair but…I really really could use some more books by my favourite authors.
Why doesn’t Veronica Roth write more? I’ve read all of Maggie Stiefvater’s books now. Hurry up with The Fever Code, please, James Dashner. Don’t make me beg…
9. When I lose my bookmark.
I’m perpetually out of bookmarks. I blame this on my puppy, as well, who loves to chew them. (He thinks it’s hilarious when he takes off with my bookmark and I have to chase him. Ha, ha. So so funny. HOW ABOUT NO.)
I constantly use an iPod for a bookmark. That’s normal, right? RIGHT?
10. When people tell me I cannot read all the books of ever.
Pfft. You are clearly deluded. OF COURSE I CAN. Sure there are like 900-books on my Goodreads to-read list, and I add at least 100 more each year. And I only read between 100-200 books a year. BUT THIS MEANS NOTHING, OKAY? I can and will read all the books. I might possibly pause briefly to find the Fountain of Youth.
If I read 100 books each year for the next 80 years (I’m assuming I’ll live to 99, okay?) then that’ll be 8,000 books.
I’m doing this. The haters will not stop me.
so, my baccivorous bookworms! what are your #bookwormproblems? do you relate to any of mine?! also (important question here) have you ever accidentally wrecked one of your books?! (are you okay?)
Cait would like to take a small moment to explain that baccivorous means you eat berries. There is no real reason to call you this except she likes alliteration. Hence she frequently calls you bioluminescent blogglings as well. All sorted? GOOD. Currently, Cait is reading Golden Son and not loving it as much as Red Rising.