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Jack Of Hearts (And Other Parts) by A.C. Rosen || Glittery Cuteness vs Creepy Terrifying Stalkers?!

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Shhh, just excuse the terrible pun while I say this book had an incredible amount of heart. 

It’s a love letter to being a minority teen (by an #ownvoices author too) and it’s a call out micro-aggressions and it’s an encouragement to kids navigating sex and friendships and high school and stereotypes and the true trauma that are origami paper cuts.

(Look not that it’s pertinent to the review, but I do origami and use a hot glue gun for some of my crafts and the amount of cuts and burns I have…dude. If you can order coordination off eBay, I would.

 

Thank you to Penguin Random House Australia for the review-copy! This is out February 19, 2019!

➸ it’s also like a total hug to queer teens everywhere

You can tell how passionately the author feels about it and wants to boost and protect queer kids. The love in this novel is immense. Jack does a heck of a lot of call outs to micro-aggressions towards the lgbtqia+ community in his columns, including addressing straight people fetishing m/m sex and smacking down slut-shaming culture. And it wasn’t preachy? Jack was so heartfelt and loving the whole time…he’s just such a good egg.

 

 

➸ so yeah there is a lot of sex in this book

Jack ends up running a sex-advice column on his best friend’s blog and he’s partially doing it because everyone in his school  judges him and gossips about him. He’s a very openly gay teen who loves parties and makeup and sex and he is not ashamed of it. But he’s sick of being gossiped about (like??? yes) and slut shamed. It becomes his way of controlling the gossip and also helping out other queer kids who want advice on relationships and sex. I mean, it’s a lot more sex than I usually read lolol, but the emphasis on safe/consensual sex was really important. And I loved that the book took a moment to talk to the asexuals about how not wanting sex doesn’t mean you’re broken.

 

 

➸ the stalker plot line was intense and terrifying !!! like!!! super terrifying

It’s like a reverse-Simon VS the Homo Sapiens Agenda. While Simon had a cute anonymous boyfriend online…Jack has a stalker sending him threatening notes on pink pretty paper. And it’s frikkin’ creepy ok. The unravelling of it all was terrifying and seeing Jack wither into an anxious mess of stress at the threats and online abuse and blackmail was horrible. Like this sparkly, kind teen turns into this muted anxious shadow and my heart b r e a k s. Writing = EXCEPTIONAL.

 

 

➸ the friendships were also my favourite thing!!

It’s about sex, not romance, so the friendships in this book are the most important relationships aND I LOVE THEM. We have Jack, our glittery flamboyant sparkle, who takes no crap from anyone and just wants to be likeable and enjoy his life. Then his best friends are Ben, who is intensely good at fashion design and hat making, and he’s black and gay and holding out for his OTP of ever. And Jenna, who is badass and an amateur reporter and made of sharp corners, who lets nothing and no one mess with her best friends. They are EPIC together. I love them !!! so much.

 

 

➸ it discussed so so many important things in a nuanced and vulnerable way

Seriously, amongst the sparkly happy tone, it really went in to talk about:

✧ stereotypes and how Jack knows he fits the “glittery flamboyant” stereotype, but he’s being himself and that’s also ok.
✧ it unpacked how we can sometimes diminish our own pain (“oh yeah I’m being blackmailed horribly but at least…I’m not dead!”) and like positivity is important! It’s good and fulfilling. But don’t discount yourself just because someone has it worse. Also his BFF Jenna wouldn’t let him get away with being apathetic about it. Like just because Jack isn’t being beaten up in hallways doesn’t mean it’s not worth calling out other micro-aggressions he faces.

 

The only things I wasn’t thrilled about was that (1) it didn’t call out the neglectful parenting from Jack’s mum, and I reeeally didn’t think it was ok. And (2) why the frick are these kids SMOKING. That is CANCER and somebody needs a cigarette slapped out of their hand. And (3) the ending almost felt so easy after all the agony we went through the entire book? But like these are tiny tiny things and probably won’t bother most!

 

The story is intense and well written and impossible to put down. It managed to be this cute and glittery story about friends and sex and being true to yourself, AS WELL as having this super intense creepy stalker storyline going on in the back that absolutely made my skin crawl. Jack is loveable and amazing and his voice is important.

 

Jack Rothman is seventeen. A solid student with a talent for art, he likes partying, makeup and boys. Sometimes all at the same time. His active, unashamed sex life makes him a red hot topic for the high school gossip machine, but Jack doesn’t really care too much about what the crowd is saying about him. His mantra is: ‘It could be worse.’
And then it is.
When Jack starts writing a teen sex advice column for his best friend’s website, he begins to receive creepy and threatening love letters. His ‘admirer’ is obsessed with Jack – they know who he’s hanging out with, who he’s sleeping with, who his mum is dating. And while they say they love Jack, they don’t love his lifestyle. They want him to curb his sexuality and personality. And if he won’t, they will force him.
As his stalker starts to ratchet up the pressure, it’s up to Jack and his friends to uncover their identity, before their love becomes genuinely dangerous.

Goodreads | Book Depository | Booktopia | Penguin

➸ similar titles to try…

   

 

tell me a book you’ve read that was cute and fluffy…but also unpacked darker themes?? and is this one on your TBR? what did you think of it?

Two Can Keep A Secret by Karen M. McManus || Just The Kind Of Thriller I Love!

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Ok so Two Can Keep A Secret was EXCELLENT and exactly what I want a thriller to be!

Usually I’m tentative about thrillers and One of Us Is Lying, while I admire it for being super-famous, it didn’t click for me. However this one?! Miiiiine. It had the small town vibes, an autumn-y Halloween aesthetic, and siblings dynamics that I adored. It took time to develop the characters and there was muuuuurder. Obviously. It is literally a murder mystery. But someone must be Captain McObvious here and I volunteer.

And no joke: I obsessed over solving the case whenever I wasn’t reading! I was invested!

 

Thank you to Penguin Australia for the review-copy! This was out January 8, 2019!

➸ I really cared about the characters!

That’s what I want out of a book ok. Make me CARE. (Which is hard with my stone cold little rock of a heart.) But the book balanced unwinding this twisty murder mystery AND developing both the narrators (Ellery and Malcolm) into dimensional and complex humans who need a hug several times during the course of the book. Or two hugs, in Malcolm’s case. Kid had it rough.

✧ Ellery: She just moved to Echo Ridge (while her mum is in rehab) and she and her twin brother, Ezra, are staying with their estranged grandma. Ellery has a bushel of curly hair, possibly Latinx complexion (her dad is unknown), and a deep love of murder mysteries. Her brother is the chill sweetheart who frequently has to say things like: “NO MURDER BEFORE BREAKFAST, ELLERY.” And I loved them so much. (I wish Ezra had been more developed though. He’s queer, but his storyline is just a sliver.)
✧ Malcolm: His older brother is the aggressive epic jock dude, who was heavily suspected in his girlfriend’s murder several years ago. Never arrested. But Malcolm lives in that shadow, despite his mum having remarried this rich flashy lawyer and now Malcolm’s actual step-sister is like the QUEEN BEE of highschool which gets Malcolm a little school cred. (He also plays IN THE BAND so like…not that much cred.) Malcolm is a little nerdy and dorky and Soft™. I absolutely adore how his relationship with Ellery was really slow-burn, despite the shortness of the book. Also he has an epic platonic relationship with Mia and they are!! so nice !!! (Mia is also Korean-American and the book discusses how it feels to be part of a minority in an overly white town.)

I lowkey suspected Malcolm of murder at one point but like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I SUSPECTED EVERYONE. SUREFIRE WAY TO BE RIGHT AT THE END.

 

➸ The plot had me super invested.

I think because I cared about the characters so easily! I wanted to know if these string of missing-girls was connected. It reminded me of Sadie when they called out how missing girls need to be taken seriously, not just called a statistic. It’s twisty and there’s lots of theories with Ellery playing detective (but she’s not obnoxious about it). I called one of the twists about her mother’s past! I’M PRACTICALLY SHERLOCK. Nevermind that I was so wrong about the actual murderer. Lmao. Minor detail.

 

➸ I do confess I (a) got confused with all the characters, and (b) it didn’t chill me to my bones.

Honestly they’re such small complaints anyway! I felt like this was a Quiet Murder Town (shh that’s now a thing) and I didn’t actually have my heart in my mouth for Ellery’s safety. But I still WANTED TO KNOW so that’s a win. And hey I’m just generally bad at names and there are SO many characters here. And everyone just had these very common-American-names like LIZ, SARAH, MIA, DAISY, BROOKE, OH HELP ME.

It was really satisfying. I just wanted to keep reading and find out all the answers. Sure I didn’t get goosebumps, but I had a thoroughly good time investing in the characters and this odd little town of Echo Ridge. It felt like a sinister contemporary, full of autumn leaves and family secrets, with a background of murderrrr. Perfect.

 

Ellery’s never been to Echo Ridge, but she’s heard all about it. It’s where her aunt went missing at age sixteen, never to return. Where a Homecoming Queen’s murder five years ago made national news. And where Ellery now has to live with a grandmother she barely knows, after her failed-actress mother lands in rehab. No one knows what happened to either girl, and Ellery’s family is still haunted by their loss.
Malcolm grew up in the shadow of the Homecoming Queen’s death. His older brother was the prime suspect and left Echo Ridge in disgrace. His mother’s remarriage vaulted her and Malcolm into Echo Ridge’s upper crust, but their new status grows shaky when mysterious threats around town hint that a killer plans to strike again. No one has forgotten Malcolm’s brother-and nobody trusts him when he suddenly returns to town.
Ellery and Malcolm both know it’s hard to let go when you don’t have closure. Then another girl disappears, and Ellery and Malcolm were the last people to see her alive. As they race to unravel what happened, they realize every secret has layers in Echo Ridge. The truth might be closer to home than either of them want to believe.
And somebody would kill to keep it hidden.

Goodreads | Booktopia | Book Depository | Penguin Australia

 

➸ similar titles to try…

    

tell me your favourite thriller?! and did you read the author’s first book? (IT’S SO FAMOUS.) and which would you pick in: plot vs characters?

Batman Nightwalker by Marie Lu || Asylums, Sociopath Girls, and Not Enough Batmanning

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I’ve always wanted to be Batman when I grow up, so this book is an actual gift.

This is the second in the DC Icon series, following up Wonder Woman: Warbringer by Leigh Bardugo, which I freaking LOVED because a magical island full of warrior woman seems like the smartest idea anyone’s ever had. So I was pretty excited to try Marie Lu’s Batman: Nightwalker! Even though I was a bit cautious because (a) I seem to never connect to Marie Lu’s books (I WANT TO THO) and (b) I fell asleep watching a DC movie once and haven’t tried since. Haha haha.

I’m sorry.

So Batman Nightwalker ended up being a mixed bowl of cereal for me. I loved the tech and the writing and the mysteries, but I found the plot a little unrealistic. It was definitely fun! But it was also a bit like lifting a spoonful of cereal to your mouth and not paying attention and tipping it down your shirt. Not that I would ever do that. Haah ahaha.

Okay let’s move forward.

  • The story is more: Bruce Wayne > Batman.
    Which if I’m going to be honest, I find disappointing. I meant the cover says BATMAN not “Bruce Wayne: Nightwalker”. So while we get the Why Does He Don The Suit™ tale, it’s like…the end goal. Mostly we just have billionaire boy Bruce learning to find his way in this world with his heartache and his complex to make ALL THE WORLD A GOOD PLACE. And wow he was so aggressively Gryffindor. All you had to do was point and say: “SOMEONE NEEDS HELP!” and there’s Brucey…flapping over to help them. Hmm. My Slytherin soul just did a double take, but anyway. But Bruce was still cute and winning and I liked him!

 

  • It’s nothing like the Christopher Nolan Batman trilogy so don’t expect that.
    AKA DON’T BE LIKE ME. #Awkward. That’s like mega dark with a devious and sometimes-cruel Batman and blood everywhere. This is more the kid-friendly version which is a bit fluffy at times and is more here to make you feel good about heroes and being brave and eating eggs for breakfast so you grow up so strong. I EAT EGGS FOR BREAKFAST. I’M GOING TO BE BATMAN, MUM.

 

  • It’s really fun seeing the familiar names come up!
    But there ARE new characters too so it’s not overly predictable. But Harvey Dent is in there and it mentions Gordon (!!) and OF FREAKING COURSE the light of the universe, aka Alfred, is there. I love Alfred! He’s the perfect mix of father, butler, and teacher with a side-dish of tea and British disapproval. He tells Bruce to slow down while driving and makes him breakfast and says he has 0% sympathy when Bruce does something stupid. Basically Alfred is just a stressed mother, doing his best.

 

  • I found the actual plot a little bit unrealistic.
    Says me…reading about A MAN BAT. But okay. So this is in the blurb, so not a spoiler, but this is how it goes down:

    • Bruce wretchedly saves the day but also technically interferes with police business so.
    • SMACK ON THE HAND, BRUCE.
    • He gets community service!
    • Which he has to serve at…wait for it…waaaait…
    • ARKHAM ASYLYM.
    • So literally we have this billionaire famous kid moping floors at the worst asylum ever where he’s verbally abused by the inmates all day.
    • He is a kid.
    • So.
    • I do find this hard to believe. I get they wanted to make him “learn” but LIKE WHO THE HECK WOULD DO THIS. Especially for such a lowkey offence as he committed. He really should fire his lawyers because they suck if he got landed with this.
    • And then he gets all involved talking to this girl inmate whom he’s getting info from and nUNGH NUNGH she’s attractive so of course his little heart beats faster.
    • But why would they let him chat with an inmate.
    • Dude.
    • Duuuuude.
    • And they’re like “Now, Bruce, she is a MURDERER and bad and will manipulate you.”
    • Bruce: “ok but what if she’s not.”
    • DUDE.

 

  • So like I had FUN but I also blinked a few times and said, “Mate lmao what.”
    But I’m here to have a good time so I won’t lose an eyeball over this.

  • All up? Fun, but a bit silly, and didn’t have enough Batmanning in it.
    But it was really short and I ate through it after being in an annoying book slump so for that I AM PLEASED. And it adorably kept the bloodshed low and even the asylum inmates kept their language ok for the children (very kind of them) and basically it was a quick and fun story of LI’LE BRUCE before he finds his batwings. 

THANKS TO PENGUIN AUSTRALIA FOR THE REVIEW-COPY. Batman Nightwalker (DC Icons #2) by Marie Lu is published January 2018.

★★★☆☆

Before he was Batman, he was Bruce Wayne. A reckless boy willing to break the rules for a girl who may be his worst enemy.
The Nightwalkers are terrorizing Gotham City, and Bruce Wayne is next on their list.
One by one, the city’s elites are being executed as their mansions’ security systems turn against them, trapping them like prey. Meanwhile, Bruce is turning eighteen and about to inherit his family’s fortune, not to mention the keys to Wayne Enterprises and all the tech gadgetry his heart could ever desire. But after a run-in with the police, he’s forced to do community service at Arkham Asylum, the infamous prison that holds the city’s most brutal criminals.
Madeleine Wallace is a brilliant killer . . . and Bruce’s only hope.
In Arkham, Bruce meets Madeleine, a brilliant girl with ties to the Nightwalkers. What is she hiding? And why will she speak only to Bruce? Madeleine is the mystery Bruce must unravel. But is he getting her to divulge her secrets, or is he feeding her the information she needs to bring Gotham City to its knees? Bruce will walk the dark line between trust and betrayal as the Nightwalkers circle closer.

Goodreads  Publisher  Buy

 

  

 

do you have a favourite Batman movie/version?! and is there a superhero you would like a childhood-origin-story about!?? also are you reading the DC Icon series and what do you think so far??

The Dark Prophecy (Trials Of Apollo #2) by Rick Riordan // Narcissistic Teen Greek Gods Are My New Favourite Ever

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It’s the #1 fact of life that any book set in the Camp Halfblood world CAN DO NO WRONG.

The Dark Prophecy is a completely fabulous sequel to The Hidden Oracle! Although I didn’t like it quite as much because (A) it wasn’t as hilarious, although still funny, and (B) the plot wasn’t as exciting and twisty as the first one. But it was still an entirely winning read for me! And I think I’m half in love with Apollo — who is a dork, narcissist, and delusional god, but what can you do. He’s adorable.

 

THIS IS A NON-SPOILER REVIEW!

Although may reference things in previous Percy Jackson books but nothing huge or massively spoilery. So you can be safe.

Apollo’s character development is just so fabulous. He’s still full of himself and really surprised when the world doesn’t revolve around him (this happens to the best of us tbh), but he’s also SO LOYAL to his little demigod companions. And he’s utter trash for looking after Meg. And, on occasion, he might even do something self-sacrificial instead of letting everyone else perish in his wake. #lovely

I do hate how they ALWAYS give him a rough time though!! I mean, I get he was a horrible god and gets blamed for everything. But he tries so hard now! And Meg is so mean to him and Calypso and Leo give him 500% of a rough time. Althoooooough. ISN’T THAT WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR. It’s actually surprising that he stays in such good spirits about his own godliness when he’s cleaning toilets and peeling carrots.


I’m still trying to bestir my soul to care about Meg though. I wasn’t really impressed with her in book #1, and she just continues to be a rude little turnip. I suppose it’s meant to be endearing??? I find the actual root vegetable more endearing. I guess I’m a fan of manners and kindness, both of which Meg is allergic to.

 

  • the unexpected; because seriously you have no idea what this book is going to throw at you
  • greek gods on facebook
  • monsters, murder, and mayhem
  • booby traps at the dinner table
  • prophecies that nearly kill you
  • tofu turkey
  • mechanical dragons that are designed like lego
  • a house that only shows you the rooms it wants to and expands when requested
  • griffins
  • a featuring f/f parent couple
  • bisexual Apollo
  • sass
  • WAR AND CALAMITY
  • did I mention sass? because multiply that x 6

 

It’s also hysterically funny! 

I think Apollo’s tendency to use “god like speech” but then mesh it with modern pop-culture references and narcissistic haikus is just the best thing since cupcakes were invented. I am such a fan. He’s also got a really different voice to Percy Jackson too, which is GREAT. I love Percy, but it’s nice to have something different. (Considering Magnus Chase is like Percy’s twin.)

 

Speaking if difference…I also love how the structure of the plot is different in the Apollo books! They’re on an adventure that continually unravels, so it’s not the same-old-same-old plot set up of the PJO books (get a prophecy, assemble a team, go on a quest, nearly die, etc.) #Refreshing

But the real question: do you read the Apollo series if you haven’t read the original Percy Jackson books?

Erm, no. There are spoilers for the Percy books because it all happens chronologically. And you wouldn’t get a lot of references or understand the importance of reoccurring characters.

This was hilariously glorious and a solid sequel!

Maybe it wasn’t as fast moving or exciting as other Halfblood books, and maaaaybe it dragged a bit in the middle. But it was still funny and used many lesser-known Greek myths so I was forced to learn things. How dare it. I‘m definitely a huge fan of Apollo!! 10/10 will recommend giving Apollo a warm pretzel and perhaps a nap because he does try so hard even though he sucks. And it’s absolutely hilarious to read about a Greek God being a mere mortal human.

 

THANK YOU TO PENGUIN RANDOM HOUSE FOR THE REVIEW-COPY. The Dark Prophecy (Trials of Apollo #2) by Rick Riordan was published May, 2017.

★★★★☆

Zeus has punished his son Apollo–god of the sun, music, archery, poetry, and more–by casting him down to earth in the form of a gawky, acne-covered sixteen-year-old mortal named Lester. The only way Apollo can reclaim his rightful place on Mount Olympus is by restoring several Oracles that have gone dark. What is affecting the Oracles, and how can Apollo/Lester do anything about them without his powers? After experiencing a series of dangerous–and frankly, humiliating–trials at Camp Half-Blood, Lester must now leave the relative safety of the demigod training ground and embark on a hair-raising journey across North America. Fortunately, what he lacks in godly graces he’s gaining in new friendships–with heroes who will be very familiar to fans of the Percy Jackson and the Olympians and Heroes of Olympus series. Come along for what promises to be a harrowing, hilarious, and haiku-filled ride.

Goodreads  Publisher  Buy

\\ click to read reviews //

  

are you a fan of the Camp Half Blood world?!? (who’s your favourite character??) and have you tried the Apollo books yet?? THOUGHTS? also do you prefer when books use myths you recognise VS obscure ones so you learn things???

Magnus Chase and the Hammer of Thor by Rick Riordan // A Magnus-ificent Sequel

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I mean, obviously I loved it. IT’S A RICK RIORDAN BOOK.

Oh and before I apologise for the atrocious pun in the title of this post, lemme give you another one. Magnus Chase and the Hammer of Thor was ASGARD as the first one. (Because “Asgard” = “as good”…get it!?? Oh I’m hilarious it actually hurts.) OKAY BUT PUNS ASIDE — I totally collapsed in a fangirling heap over this exciting instalment of gods, demigods, dead people, falafel and mild doom.

Also it’s hilarious. Obviously. But there is a 100% chance I will laugh OUT LOUD when reading a Rick Riordan book.

Before we launch in, feel free to trot back to my review of Magnus Chase and the Sword of Summer, which is book 1 of the series. This is the sequel. NO SPOILERS WILL BE SPOILED. Obviously. I am a delightful person not a monster.

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Can we talk about the characters first?!

Because they are enormously amazing. And the diversity levels are on point which makes me very pleased. And the secondary characters?! They are complex and intriguing, JUST AS THEY SHOULD BE. But let’s go into list mode, yes. Because I can’t help myself.

  • MAGNUS CHASE of course remains my favourite. Although at times he nearly felt like a secondary character in his own story…just because the plot REALLY centred around Loki’s children in this one. And Magnus is a child of Frey. SO. #awkward But he still has so much snark and sass and is really a squishable darling with a very bad haircut due to needing his locks to stitch up a bowling ball bag. UM, I SWEAR IT MAKES SENSE WHEN YOU READ IT.
  • SAMIRAH is still a puddle of awesomeness and stubbornness. She’s also Muslim and POC and wears a magical hijab! And her love remains strong for her betrothed. Also someone give this woman a medal for all the dorky quips she has to put up with from Magnus. (Also 1000% happy she and Magnus can have an epic friendship with no love-triangle. Bless this book.)
  • ALEX FIERRO is a newcomer (child of Loki) but very important to this plot. At first I didn’t like Alex because they’re really rude…but noooo, stop your flapping about in panic there Cait, because Alex is AMAZING and is a cinnamon roll. Truly. Alex is gender-fluid, but uses either he or she pronouns depending which gender they identify with on the day. I also thought it was super interesting how they tied this in with Loki being gender-fluid too (YA KNOW THAT TIME LOKI WAS A HORSE AND GAVE BIRTH….) Mythology is awesome, peoples. Plus Alex shapeshifts. So, epic levels are just exploding.
  • HEARTH and BLITZ are present as always and we get so much more of Hearth’s backstory! Also I commented in book 1 how I thought it was unrealistic how accurately Hearth read lips (when in fact it is very hard to read accurately), but you know what? NONE OF THAT WAS HERE OMG. There was much more emphasis on sign language! I’M SO PLEASED.
  • THE GODS were all nuts. Truly. I love it. Every time a new deity was introduced, just prepare yourself to laugh at the nonsense levels.

 

“Why doesn’t Thor go check this barrow himself?” I asked. “Wait…let me guess. He doesn’t want to draw attention. Or he wants us to have a chance to be heroes. Or it’s hard work and he has some shows to catch up on.”
“To be fair,” Otis said, “the new season of Jessica Jones did just start streaming.”

magnus-chase-thor-2-riordan Also there remains NO ROMANCE. I have a feeling we’ll ship Magnus/Alex eventually? They could be cute. I can see it in the future. So far though, it’s FRENS. And I love this so much about this series!

I love all the pop-culture references too. They’re hilarious. Everything is hilarious. And yes if I say “hilarious” one more time in this review you can come smack me with a replica Thor’s hammer. (I say “replica” because are you worthy enough to lift it? hahah. No. Me on the other hand…) I love how the gods are taking selfies and watching Netflix. Plus the talking-sword, Jack, loves singing pop-songs. I KNOW. JUST APPRECIATE THAT STATEMENT FOR A MINUTE.

 

I flung him overhead. Jack spiralled out of view, flying after the goat-killer while singing his own version of “Shake It Off”. (I have never been able to convince him that the line isn’t cheese graters gonna grate, grate, grate, grate, grate.)

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The actual plot was 80% awesome and 20%“this is kind of a needless side-tour and wut r we doing here get to the point mate”.

The quest to find Thor’s hammer was a bit too rambly, with some of the side-quests feeling like unnecessary detours. But you know what? I’m a concise person. I like to see something and GO GET IT IMMEDIATELY. So a more patient person would probably be cool with this. I just want to CUT TO THE CHASE (hahahah, get it…because Magnus Chase?! Okay, to be fair, I warned you my pun game was strong today). But we have bowling competitions with giants and talk about butt-dialing the apocalypse too. And it’s all amusing, so I shall shush.

But I still couldn’t put it down! I zooooomed through those 470-pages and JUST WANTED MORE.

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Basically it was a monstrous tome of fantasticness.

I finished off with a huge craving for (A) more books which are not out yet dangit, and (B) falafel because Magnus has quite a thing for falafel and like I need to get onboard with this?? Someone make me some, yes?? But HEY. I laughed! I flailed! Any time Percy Jackson’s name was tossed in I THINK I FANGIRLED FAR TOO HARD.

And now, if you need me, I’ll just be petting the cover, because the font is slightly raised and shiny and beautiful.

 

Etiquette tip: if you’re looking for the right time to leave a party, when the host yells “No one leaves here alive,” that’s your cue.

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THANK YOU TO PENGUIN RANDOM HOUSE FOR THE REVIEW-COPY. Magnus Chase and the Hammer of Thor (Gods of Asgard #2) by Rick Riordan was published October, 2016.

4 stars

magnus chase and the hammer of thorThor’s hammer is missing again. The thunder god has a disturbing habit of misplacing his weapon – the mightiest force in the Nine Worlds. But this time the hammer isn’t just lost, it has fallen into enemy hands. If Magnus Chase and his friends can’t retrieve the hammer quickly, the mortal worlds will be defenseless against an onslaught of giants. Ragnarok will begin. The Nine Worlds will burn. Unfortunately, the only person who can broker a deal for the hammer’s return is the gods’ worst enemy, Loki – and the price he wants is very high.

Goodreads  Publisher   Buy

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do you have a favourite Riordan character?!? (i know it’s a torturous question, but do your best) and what do you think of the Magnus Chase series? do you think the books are too long, or just perfection?? and what’s another book that made you laugh out loud??? LET US CHAT!

Holding Up The Universe by Jennifer Niven // levels of #FABULOUSNESS are extreme

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I’ve been waiting for Holding Up the Universe for BASICALLY 74 YEARS.

Give or take, like, a few years…but it feels forever since I had my fragile and delicate destroyed by Jennifer Niven’s All The Bright Places (which coincidentally is one of my top favourited reviews on Goodreads with 400+ likes!) and I was SO READY FOR THIS NEW BOOK!

I’ll be honest: I don’t think it’s as good as ATBP. But it’s a different story, a different feel, and a different message. I don’t want to compare them too much! (I mean, it’s BAD ENOUGH that this poor book has that horrible permanent sticker on the front cover reminding it of its older sibling’s success while it is yet a new hatchling…poor dear.) All you need to know is: (A) I thoroughly enjoyed this, (B) even if I do have a few twitchy qualms, and (C) I am not destroyed! Yay!

HAHAHAH JUST KIDDING. THERE IS MUCH MORE YOU NEED TO KNOW. Read on, dear Algernon. We have much to discuss.

(And OBVIOUSLY this review will have no spoilers. But since it’s such a highly anticipated book across the blogosphere, I figured I should put that disclaimer.)

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I loved the message of being seen and finding self-worth.

Doesn’t everyone feel invisible and unwanted on occasion?? So this should resonate with basically 97% of everybody. Bless it. The story is equal parts about Libby (who is known as the “fattest teen in America”) and Jack (who has prosopagnosia, aka face blindness and recognises NOBODY). I adored their dual-narration and I loooooved their story line. NO BORING MOMENTS. Perfect pacing. And Jennifer Niven’s writing is A GIFT TO HUMANKIND ACROSS THE GALAXIES. Her writing always makes me feeeeel all the things.

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And the characters? BE STILL MY RAPIDLY BEATING HEART BECAUSE: JACK.

HE IS A PRECIOUS CINNAMON ROLL OF BAD DECISIONS. Seriously, such bad decisions. Stahp, Jack. He has prosopagnosia, which is face-blindness, which is actually a disability I’ve researched a lot and am quite interested about. I really felt for Jack. He doesn’t want anyone to know he can’t recognise faces, so he compensates by being “untouchable” like nothing and no one can hurt him with all his swagger. Plus I relate hugely to him, not because I have prosopagnosia, but just because I relate to (A) Jack having social anxiety, and (B) when he walks into a room he can’t recognise people so it’s basically like being surrounded by strangers all the time, and I struggle to read faces so Jack’s drowning feeling of “WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE, WHAT DO THEY THINK, WHAT’S GOING ON” was relatable to me and so so so well written.

Plus Jack has SWAGGER and an afro that he calls his LION’S MANE and the dude is just downright #FABULOUS.

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DUUUUUUDE.

 

Buuuut…I struggled to care about Libby.

She has a very self-righteous attitude and she makes DUMB DECISIONS TOO…but Jack is 100% aware of his, while Libby just denies/justifies hers. How is this fair??? It is not??? Jack and Libby BOTH assume people are going to make their lives hellish (#socialanxiety) but Libby deals with it by ALWAYS assuming the worst of people…even when they’ve done nothing but be nice to her. Ask first. Accuse later, maybe?? But HEY! Libby was seriously brave and intent on spreading messages of self-love and her sassy clap-backs to bullies were AMAZING.

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BRIEF LIST OF OTHER THINGS I LOVED

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  • SUPERNATURAL REFERENCES!! Which gives me life, honestly.
  • There is so much dancing. DANCING. The only time I’ve ever danced in my life is when I walked through a spider web, but that doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate it. They rocked the dancing here.
  • So much diversity! Of size, ethnicity (Jack is biracial), mental illnesses, and disabilitites.
  • #HAIRAPPRECIATION. I’m not even sorry. I have a deep love of fabulous hair.
  • Hate to love romance. My FAVOURITE romance trope.
  • I HAD AN EMOTION. I actually got totally squished with emotions. At one stage it was SO INSUFFERABLY CUTE that I had to stop reading and just squee. Also there are times when I had to stop reading and HOWL.

 

BRIEF LIST OF DISLIKES, UNFORTUNATELY

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  • Well, Libby. Which I feel bad about, but seriously…sometimes I didn’t feel like shipping them?
  • Not really sure what everyone’s motivations where. Like why wouldn’t Jack tell his parents he was face-blind?? His family was having Big Issues, but STILL. And why wouldn’t Libby go to the principal when she was bullied? She told another girl to go to the principal for being bullied??? And why would Libby BULLY HERSELF and then turn around and speak about self-worth? She legit wrote nasty things about herself in the bathroom. I just…I don’t…understand???
  • Sometimes Jack’s face-blindness didn’t make sense. For instance, he can’t recognise his family’s faces. Yes. But he kept saying things like “the man I assume is my father walks into the room” WHICH MAKES NO SENSE. I can freaking tell which member of my family is coming down the stairs without seeing them. He has “identifiers” like hair and weight and voices and physical features like sticking-out-ears…so it seemed silly that he KEPT underlining he couldn’t recognise his family.
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I’M HOLDING UP THE UNIVERSE, YES.

This book is still a precious little universe * of wonder and I COULD NOT PUT IT DOWN.

Sure I had quibbles, but I love love loved it and I just wanted to stay devouring it forever. Jack and his precious #FABULOUSNESS rates as one of my top-favourite-contemporary-boys. And any book that wants to talk about self worth is DOING GOOD IN THIS WORLD, THANK YOU. It hit me in the feels several times and just…HOLD ME. ** I love this book.

 

* See what I did there? HUH? HUH? GET IT?
** And see what I did there? I’m on a title pun ROLL right now, go me.

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THANK YOU TO PENGUIN RANDOM HOUSE FOR THE REVIEW-COPY. Holding Up the Universe by Jennifer Niven was published October, 2016.

4 stars

28686840Everyone thinks they know Libby Strout, the girl once dubbed “America’s Fattest Teen.” But no one’s taken the time to look past her weight to get to know who she really is. Following her mom’s death, she’s been picking up the pieces in the privacy of her home, dealing with her heartbroken father and her own grief. Now, Libby’s ready: for high school, for new friends, for love, and for every possibility life has to offer. In that moment, I know the part I want to play here at MVB High. I want to be the girl who can do anything. 
Everyone thinks they know Jack Masselin, too. Yes, he’s got swagger, but he’s also mastered the impossible art of giving people what they want, of fitting in. What no one knows is that Jack has a newly acquired secret: he can’t recognize faces. Even his own brothers are strangers to him. He’s the guy who can re-engineer and rebuild anything, but he can’t understand what’s going on with the inner workings of his brain. So he tells himself to play it cool: Be charming. Be hilarious. Don’t get too close to anyone.
Until he meets Libby. When the two get tangled up in a cruel high school game—which lands them in group counseling and community service—Libby and Jack are both pissed, and then surprised. Because the more time they spend together, the less alone they feel. Because sometimes when you meet someone, it changes the world, theirs and yours.

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have you read a Jennifer Niven book?! what do you think?! tell me someone else here has serious fictional-hair-appreciation because i need to flail hairily. also: do you ever find yourself loving one character but not the other, so not shipping them so much?

And I Darken by Keirsten White

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And I Darken was a very viciously stabby book and for that? I AM A FAN.

Excuse me, I think my psycho is showing. Ahem. Let’s move forward to my thoughts, shall we?

“But what is the book actually about, Cait?” you ask, because it is an oddly unique tome. And lucky for you today I’m writing a list of things this book is about. So you can (A) know what to expect when you read it, and (B) know if it’s for you. It ain’t your average YA, so this list will help you know whether you should devour it at dawn.

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7 FACTS ABOUT AND I DARKEN

 

  • It isn’t fantasy. Whoever is bopping around the internet saying “Ooh epic fantasy!” is WRONG and needs to sit down. This is historical fiction. Granted it is gender-swapped, but I don’t call that fantasy! I call that a retelling. So it’s a sort of historical fiction retelling. But there is zero magic okay? OKAY. Just clearing this up.

 

  • Hello monstrous amounts of politics. It almost reminded me of Game of Thrones in that respect. Because And I Darken it is 90% about who is at war with who and who wants to stab and impale who and it’s about alliances and broken alliances and who gets the throne and etc etc.

 

  • There is a lot of historical information. This is definitely not a negative if you like historical facts! Except not all the facts are historical (the author mentions this in her note at the end) so I unfortunately cannot wax poetic about Vlad the Impaler to my family because I’m not sure what was real or not. Here, let me calmly summarise: everyone distrusts everyone and there’s stabbing.

 

  • So many precious murder characters. Peoples, the dark and viciousness in this book is THE REAL DEAL. Often I read books where it crows “I am so dark and scary!” and the character, like, sneezes on a puppy and doesn’t apologise or whatever. So scary. Please no. YOU GET NONE OF THAT HERE. Lada is downright CRUEL. She stabs and bites and she’s 100% feral and wild and she’s basically amazing. I loved her. She is the most violent thing I’ve read in a long time.
    • It’s actually narrated 50% Lada and 50% Radu.
    • Radu is the younger brother and basically my favourite thing ever. He’s the “weak” one. He spent his childhood being abused and neglected. And despite Lada tormenting him 89% of the time, they have this awesome SIBLING BOND WHICH I ADORED.
    • They are the only ones they can depend on.
    • Seriously, these killer pumpkins are my favourite.
    • I cry over them.
    • I would never ever ever ever ever like to meet them in real life.
    • Just putting it out there.
    • I LOVE THEM FROM A DISTANCE.
    • OTHERWISE:

 

 

  • It is a love triangle. But I’m going to call it an Unrequited Oblivious Triangle Wherein No One Expresses Feelings And Everyone Is Somewhat Awful.
    • See, there is this young Sultan named Mehmed who is actually a little beast but also very charming.
    • He loves Lada.
    • Lada takes a long time to love him back.
    • Radu? Radu is so freaking in love with Mehmed that he basically sentences himself to his rooms so he can never see Memhed again. #logic
    • Mehmed has 0% of an idea that Radu loves him so much.
    • Do you see what I mean??? It ain’t your average triangle. Particularly considering most of the parties don’t even realise the other parties have feelings.
    • They are all for Oppressing Feelings.
    • And honestly, everyone’s so stabby and Mehmed has a harem and Radu manipulates people and Lada scares the living hell out of everyone, that I don’t even know who I ship.
    • (Although Radu is only 16% stabby and too precious for this world and very clever and also a spy and will probably end up ruler of all, to be honest.)

 

  • It’s very long. 500+ pages. My favourite scenes were the conversations between Mehmed and Lada and Radu. They were such an awesome and complex and dynamic trio. I will squish them. But I honestly wish the book had been half as long and involved more action.

 

  • It’s violent and dark, but I wouldn’t say overly graphic? There is death! But I felt like it mostly told the murder and mayhem instead of describing it in deep detail, which kept it well in the YA category. PEOPLE DO GET IMPALED THOUGH. Blood is shed and Lada is violently vicious. Just sayin’.

 

I have fond feelings for this vicious book.

It wasn’t an easy read. It was gritty and brutal and cruel and it was intense and actually kind of emotional?! I FREAKING LOVED THE CHARACTERS SO VERY MUCH. I will definitely read on with the series!! I NEED MORE RADU.

Definitely try this one if you like (A) gender-bent historical fiction retellings, (B) actually brutal characters, (C) impaling, (D) tragic precious darlings who turn out to be wickedly intelligent, and (E) detailed historical universes.

THANK YOU TO PENGUIN RANDOM AUSTRALIA FOR THE REVIEW-COPY! And I Darken by Kiersten White was published June, 2016.

25324111No one expects a princess to be brutal. And Lada Dragwyla likes it that way.
Ever since she and her brother were abandoned by their father to be raised in the Ottoman sultan’s courts, Lada has known that ruthlessness is the key to survival. For the lineage that makes her and her brother special also makes them targets.
Lada hones her skills as a warrior as she nurtures plans to wreak revenge on the empire that holds her captive. Then she and Radu meet the sultan’s son, Mehmed, and everything changes. Now Mehmed unwittingly stands between Lada and Radu as they transform from siblings to rivals, and the ties of love and loyalty that bind them together are stretched to breaking point.
The first of an epic new trilogy starring the ultimate anti-princess who does not have a gentle heart. Lada knows how to wield a sword, and she’ll stop at nothing to keep herself and her brother alive.

 

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do you like historical fiction? how about viciously stabby anti-hero princesses? do you like when books include tons of politics to make the world deeper, or does that terrify you? OH AND HAVE YOU READ AND I DARKEN? AND PLEASE DO.