In a stunning turn of events, August is over and I’m trying to turn into a book.
I was sitting on my floor balancing my laptop on a stack of books so I could write a book because the only furniture in my bedroom now are BOOKSHELVES — and I realised I am 78% of the way to becoming a book myself.
This can’t possibly go wrong.
And further proof to my bookness — I FINISHED WRITING MY 6TH NOVEL OF THIS YEAR. The walls are closing in a bit, I can smell colours, and, my hands are a little tingly, and there was a meteorite in the sky at six am but like??? I’m sure it’s fine.
Shall we recap this month or shall we all just run away screaming now? *
* PRO TIP: run away screaming.
ALSO I REACHED 10K ON TWITTER SO THAT’S EXCITING. FOLLOW @ ME I’M FUNNY.
- THE HEARTS WE SOLD: This came in the Owlcrate Book Box (WHICH WAS SUCH A GOOD BOX OMG) and I’m so so excited for it. Deals with demons and missing organs. I mean. Exciting.
- THIS MONSTROUS THING: So I 500% bought this because I love The Gentleman’s Guide To Vice And Virtue so much. INSERT ALL THE HEART EYES. Also this is my reward for writing so many freaking books in 3 months.
- A LIST OF CAGES: I read an eARC of this in January and it bROKE me. So obviously I had to own it so I could be broke many many times. ★★★★★
- RULES FOR THIEVES: Soooo this is EXCITING. The author actually sent me this because about 3 (maybe 4?) years ago we were critique partners!! DUDE, I’M MENTIONED IN THE BACK AHHHHH. So excited to reread!
- TEETH: OMG SO GOOD AND SO BRUTAL. Basically magical queer fish, sickness, mermaids, sadness, and your heart in twelve pieces. ★★★★★
- WONDER WOMAN WARBRINGER: And this came in the Illumicrate book box! OMG IT WAS SO GOOD. I mean obviously because BARDUGO. And all the healthy complex beautiful female friendships of ever.★★★★☆
- SCARDUST: It’s like a softcore sci-fi about a boy who wants to spread his brother’s ashes on Mars and he meets a mysterious boy who fell from the sky and TRAGEDY AND BULLETS ENSUE. As much as I loved it, I was a bit anguished that it was only 250 pages and I paid freaking $25 for it. Hello, Australia, pls fix your BOOK PRICES. ★★★★☆
(Thanks to Text Publishing, Bloomsbury, and Allen & Unwin)
- BEAUTIFUL MESS: Honestly a good descriptor for my entire blogging aesthetic. EXCITED.
- BREAKING: Rich girls at boarding schools who are all backstabbing evil…like wow. So original and full of tropes I’m tired of. ★★☆☆☆
- GENUINE FRAUD: Okay WOW this will mess with your head. Such a twisty thriller! I maaaaaaybe interviewing E Lockhart soon too so STAY TUNED. ★★★☆☆
(all covers link to goodreads)
Sooooo close to 33K!!
Don’t forget to scroll/hover over the covers! They flip around and will show you a mini review and star-rating!
Also click on them to take you to my review. HOW FUN IS THIS. Spoiler: Very fun.
T O P P O S T S:
I N T R I G U I N G S E A R C H E S:
(These are things people have searched to find my blog and I’m helpfully answering them.)
- “favourite book from raven cycle” — I think you typo’d and meant to say all of them.
- “writing novel is so beautiful” — what kind of apple juice are you drinking because I would like some.
- “can reading too much be harmful” — only if people interrupt you constantly and then you must bludgeon them to death with your favourite hardcover. Then it’s harmful to the book. Not sure about the person??? They’ll be okay.
- “lord of shadows ending” — we don’t talk about it, ok.
- “the step-by-step guide to awesome bookstagram” — I am like SO FLATTERED you landed on my blog. Like is this the point where I crown myself and my head swells so big???? WOW.
- “paper fury new post” — AWWWWW!!! NOW YOU’RE JUST BUTTERING ME UP AND I’M BLUSHING. This glorious auspicious event occurs every Monday, Tuesday, and Saturday at 7pm EST Australian time usually followed by a shower of asteroids to herald the coming of my words.
- “what you get from reading too much” — I know the answer to this one.
- “ya novels that didn’t end up together” — This is really tragic but has happened to me too. I separate my YA novels all the time to stop them getting familiar and falling in love. My paperback of Blue Lily Lily Blue is on a different shelf to my hardcover of Blue Lily Lily Blue. They cry softly together at night. I am a monster. I do not bend.
- “why does my writing suck” — Because there’s not enough scenes solely dedicated to cake.
- “these books are not here for me” — Yes I agree. It’s like they show up, take our money, ruin our lives and then aren’t even emotionally supportive???? What the even.
- “what happens if you start reading” — you die. 1/10 do not recommend. Every one who has EVER read books has ended up dying.
- “stupid questions asked by people to bookaholics” — People keep asking me where my floor is since they can’t see it under all the books AND I’M JUST TIRED OF IT, OK. I DON’T WANT A FLOOR. I WANT PILES OF BOOKS.
- “writer’s block because you’re worried that your book is shit” — It happens. Eat some cake, set your hair on fire, keep writing.
- “lessons you can learn from the book ‘red queen'” — Don’t have 3 boyfriends at once.
- “that’s not realistic” — Welcome to my blog tho.
- “which film character’s face thatmy face resembles” — I don’t know about you but I am 500% sure I resemble Toothless from How To Train Your Dragon. But it’s important to figure out your film doppelgänger so please do your research.
GOOD NEWS!! It’s 20% off + FREE shipping on Society6 this weekend!
I have like so many designs and a lot of them are bitter bookworm ones or slightly SCHWABED or will ignite your inner violent writer. (Plus I’m open to requests!) I suggest ye get thine eyeballs over there and peruse.
A collection of bookish news I find in my
obsessive stalking lowkey travels across the internet:
- So obviously the BIGGEST NEWS OF THE YEEEEEEAR IS THAT VE SCHWAB IS WRITING MORE BOOKS IN THE SHADES OF LONDON WORLD. I’M SO FRIKKIN’ PLEASED I AM ACTUALLY DEAD. She signed a $1million deal (wughughuwua) and it comes out in 2020 and I might cry with happiness. She also blogged about how the idea started here.
- Sabaa Tahir’s Ember in the Ashes covers got a redesign! They now feature badass POC and I think the first one is particularly epic.
- If you’re dying for Jay Kristoff and Amie Kaufman’s OBSIDIO…here’s an excerpt!
- Emery Lord is writing a sequel to one of her well-loved books, The Start Of Me And You.
- Epic Reads HATES US and has 18+ new books for us to add to our TBRs.
- Mackenzie Lee, author of The Gentleman’s Guide To Vice And Virtue is writing A FLUFFY PERCY x MONTY NOVELLA. Ahhhhhh!!
- Maggie Stiefvater did some excellent Q&As to make me desperate for the Ronan trilogy even more.
- Tara Sim’s TIMKEEPER novels have new covers and they’re just GORGEOUS.
- There might be more Twilight and The Hunger Games movies coming. My entire opinion is: no.
- Neil Gaiman’s GOOD OMENS is becoming a movie! And starring David Tennant! This book is so funny I think it’ll be fab as a movie.
- More cast members have been added to The Hate U Give movie production! And mooooore here too.
- There’s a movie about Christopher Robin coming to make us all cry I guess.
- There’s a cast for the Dumplin’ movie.
- Jon Snow tries to be a dragon and is, basically, all of us. (No spoilers! Just a funny behind-the-scenes clip!)
- There was a HUGE scandal with a YA book buying its way onto the NYT bestseller list. I don’t quite understand what happened, but here’s a summary article.
- Lesley Livingston’s THE VALIANT is being adapted into a badass drama series by CW.
- Briana @ Pages Unbound Reviews has tips for writing your very first blog post!
- Kate @ All The Trinkets has 5 reminders for when you think you’re not worth enough.
- Ilsa @ A Whisper Of Ink interviewed meeeeeee.
- Kara @ Kara Terzis talks about why fairy tales and retellings are so amazing!
Also I BLURBED A BOOK!!!
This is Reign of the Fallen and comes out in January 2018. GET IT ON THINE WISHLIST.
And MY TWEET IS FAMOUS SO WOW. THERE WE GO.
BECAUSE MY RECAPS CLEARLY AREN’T LONG ENOUGH….OOOOH LOOK! A NEW SECTION.
I don’t generally watch a lot of TV or movies because I have the attention span of a very distracted grape. It’s a problem. But after writing SIX NOVELS THIS YEAR [insert screaming] I’ve been feeling a bit creatively drained. And I do find TV series in particular helpful to watch to take notes on character arcs and facial expressions and body language. Honest, if you’re a writer, it’s actually worth it to analyse film.
BUT I GENERALLY GET SO BORED OKAY. And also rarely have time. But anyway. This month I’ve been watching…
Which is basically about an 18yo autistic boy who wants to get a girlfriend. I HAVE MIXED FEELINGS. On one hand, some of the ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder) rep was really accurate, especially the sensory overload scenes and anxiety. But for a kid who’s been in therapy his whole life, the protagonist didn’t act like it. So basically stereotypes were way out of proportion. And I felt the crux of the show at the end was like, “Omg YAY SAM you are acting more normal!” which frustrates me no end. An autistic person’s character arc should never conclude with them doing something neurotypical to be “successful“. C’mon mate.
I’m in paaaaaain. Supernatural is my FAVOURITE and they’re absolutely destroying it with NO plot, and NO character development, and NO humour. I can’t even. It’s literally so boring I watch one episode and take a 3 week break. I’m only up to Ep. 14 and everything is dumb and I’m crying.
This show used to be so good? They need to do something new or end it. I miss the old Winchester bros.
Okay this was seriously cringey at times and yet at the end I really loved it and would totally watch S2. Yes I’m laugh/crying at me too. ALL THE TEENAGE DRAMA ANGST. I basically live texted my sister all my pithy thoughts until she threatened to travel 2000kms to my hometown and murder me. Rude. I actually only lived for the complexity that was Jughead + his deadbeat dad’s complicated relationship. But I kind of just started laughing in like the scenes were Uber Rich Girl is getting ready for bed WHILE STILL WEARING A PEARL NECKLACE AND STILETTOS. I’M NOT EVEN JOKING. I WISH I WAS. HOLY KELP, PEOPLE.
Also I should note it took me 3 months to finish like 13 episodes. Because no !! attention span !! And Betty Cooper (Lili Reinhart) looks like she’s Shailene Woodley’s long lost sister.
I am bad with faces, but this is the same person.
- Oh wow so there’s a lot to put here because apparently I HAVE A LIFE THIS MONTH. (It’s weirding me out too don’t worry.)
- HI, I FINISHED WRITING MY 6TH BOOK OF THE YEAR. Which is super intense?! I have never never never written so much before. I also posted snippets this time. (SCREAMING) It’s my epic fantasy Glass Monsters which I’ve talked about a smol smudge around here. It’s a hot mess but…also mildly funny. Someone else edit it for me thanks.
- And yes I did in fact write 3 books in 3 months, each one over 110,000 words.
- This takes me up to 880,000 words written in 2017. Yes, the mess on the floor is me. Can I get to a million though????
- #Overachiever #Problems
- I also rewrote one of my contemporaries. I don’t know why I said “I have a life this month” because I DON’T. Just writing. And then rewriting. And this was tough. I cried a bit.
- Ok fine I cried a lot. Are you happy seeing me be human now.
- Also just so you know, I AM VERY FREAKING HILARIOUS. I text my smol sister a lot and just will put it out there that my wit knows no bounds. Also I think she wants to mute me but like, whatever.
- Oh but the one on the end is ME + TEXTING MY SMOL 4 YEAR OLD NIECE. Whom I love. She’s practically a book blogger already seeing as though she’s got the book and heart emojis down. PS. She’s texting me on her mother’s phone. She’s more successful at texting than me. But okay.
- I HAVE A WILD TEXTING LIFE.
- Speaking of my niece, I’m so FREAKING EXCITED because MY SISTER + 2 x NIECES AND 1 x NEPHEW AND 1 x UNKNOWN = ARE COMING TO VISIT. As I’ve mentioned, I moved 3 months ago about 2,000kms away. I will put forth to the universe that I dislike this move to the 99%. (It was for my parents.) Imagine me as a very gnarly marmot biting everyone. That’s me. REGARDLESS! I’m so ridiculously excited to see my faaaaamily again. The “unknown” is because my sister is having another baby, not because aliens are coming. (#I #Wish.) Trying to convince her to name it Lemony or Snicket. So far, failing.
- I may be a little sparse online over the next 2 weeks but also probably not because do I truly exist outside the internet?
- I am a pile of books on legs.
- ALSO I’M DYING OF LAUGHTER BUT I got a friend request on Goodreads from someone who works at Goodreads and read my improvement post. I’m so embarrassed.
- MAYBE THEY’LL GIVE US HALF STARS?
- Ha ha…ha.
- Aaaaand my Netgalley ratio is up to 95%! Which is kind of unreal. Little bit worried about me because what if I actually conquer my TBR? What will I complain about??
- I ALSO WANT TO POINT OUT THAT I HAVE ONLY 7 BOOKS IN THIS HAUL THAT I HAVEN’T READ. Dude. I average reading 20 books per month so this means…I genuinely am getting ahead on my TBR. I’m actually terrified. Also lowkey worried I’m in a bit of a book slump because I’ve requested like NOTHING for months. But oooooh well.
- Maybe my TBR won’t fall on me and kill me flat!
- #delusional #paperfury